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  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
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nabzilla

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nabzilla
  • Town/Country : Sydney, Australia
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 2626
  • Number of comments : 86
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

About nabzilla : n a b z i l l a ♥

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nabzilla's favorite FMLs

Today, two guys broke into my apartment to rob me at gunpoint. While I was wanking. FML

#14043132 (250)

I agree, your life sucks (44791) - you deserved it (7788)

On 12/01/2010 at 12:11am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Louisiana)

Today, the hooker I have been seeing regularly for almost a year texted me to say she thinks we should no longer see each other again. I just got dumped by a hooker. FML

#13915907 (243)

I agree, your life sucks (11444) - you deserved it (38166)

On 11/20/2010 at 8:06pm - intimacy - by pst - South Africa (Western Cape)

Today, I took my two-year-old daughter swimming. While sitting in the hot tub, my daughter pointed to the elderly man sitting across from us and mumbled something. I couldn't understand her, so I asked her to repeat it. After two more attempts, she shouted, "MOM! He has big boobs!" FML

#13912441 (87)

I agree, your life sucks (16550) - you deserved it (4720)

On 11/20/2010 at 2:07pm - kids - by Lexi - Canada

Today, a telemarketer found me so weird that he hung up on me. FML

#13861798 (100)

I agree, your life sucks (16027) - you deserved it (5865)

On 11/16/2010 at 3:07am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I just found out that my ex girlfriend is gonna be my step mother. FML

#13850566 (188)

I agree, your life sucks (59208) - you deserved it (2894)

On 11/15/2010 at 6:33am - misc - by xkal174 - United States (New York)

Today, was my girlfriend's birthday. I planned it to perfection: we went shopping, bowling, had lunch in a nice Italian restaurant, watched a French comedy, walked by the river. She also got many presents. Tonight, I was exhausted but happy for her... until she told me her birthday is tomorrow. FML

#13830674 (131)

I agree, your life sucks (8114) - you deserved it (21778)

On 11/13/2010 at 7:28pm - misc - by frenchboyfriend (man) - Australia (Queensland)

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, someone in my class wrote 'erase me if you can' at the very top of the board, as I am always tormented about how short I am compared to everyone else. No matter how hard I tried, I couldn't reach it. I'm the teacher. FML

#13815029 (214)

I agree, your life sucks (33005) - you deserved it (3461)

On 11/12/2010 at 1:23pm - misc - by Petitprof (man) - France (Provence-Alpes-Cote d'Azur)

Today, at the Museum I volunteer at, I was touching some of the things in the exhibit where you can feel what natural boobs and testes feel like. I started rolling the "boob" like a stress ball and forgot where I was. When I realized people were staring, it became very awkward. FML

#13799355 (158)

I agree, your life sucks (6516) - you deserved it (26962)

On 11/11/2010 at 6:30am - intimacy - by latino (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I tried opening a can for the first time using a manual can opener. I tried for a half hour to open a can of ravioli, mutilating the can in the process. Only after watching five Youtube videos on how to use a manual can opener did I notice the pull-tab on the top of the ravioli can. FML

#13789664 (237)

I agree, your life sucks (4760) - you deserved it (40759)

On 11/10/2010 at 12:14pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I was at the doctors office after throwing up for the past week. My diagnosis? Apparently I'm the first pregnant man. After about minutes of freaking out and explaining on how it was possible, he told me he was joking and that I'm fine, but my reaction was best thus far. FML

#13787466 (155)

I agree, your life sucks (35730) - you deserved it (12165)

On 11/10/2010 at 5:28am - health - by youreajoker (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I was writing my narrative essay for my English class. When I turned it in, I was really proud of what I thought I wrote. Evidently for some people listening to music while writing essays is a bad thing. My essay was filled with little bits of ZZ Top lyrics. FML

#13784109 (146)

I agree, your life sucks (4054) - you deserved it (19157)

On 11/09/2010 at 11:00pm - work - by hwscrewed - United States (Texas)

Today, I need to find a way to explain to my 5, 7 and 12 year old kids their uncle wants to become their aunt. FML

#13773002 (65)

I agree, your life sucks (39091) - you deserved it (6694)

On 11/09/2010 at 12:32am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I found my son's iPod touch and was looking at a light-saber app. He walked into the living room to see me fighting the cat and making sound effects to myself. FML

#13760701 (104)

I agree, your life sucks (4110) - you deserved it (17997)

On 11/08/2010 at 1:07am - animals - by yay! - United States (Arizona)

Today, I went shopping with my new "It's true, I'm a Ninja" shirt on. Suddenly an apple comes and hits me right in the eye. A little boy runs up to me, yells "You aren't a Ninja! A Ninja would have caught that!", and runs off. FML

#13756412 (201)

I agree, your life sucks (12470) - you deserved it (39098)

On 11/07/2010 at 8:13pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I went on a drive with my girlfriend when we went past a 'Dead End' sign. She pointed to it and said it was "Foreshadowing our relationship". FML

#13754319 (115)

I agree, your life sucks (22256) - you deserved it (2146)

On 11/07/2010 at 4:32pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)