Submit your FML story
- - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
About mybluedream : Quickly! If you look off the horizon there you can see the last fuck I gave about your opinion fly away!
My names Chase, just like the bank, yes.
I smoke weed. Daily. Love it. Almost more than how I love my Jack. Straight.
I listen to a lot of metal. Screamo. Some rap every now and then.
Don't watch that much tv. A movie here and there.
I'd like to think I'm pretty mind blowing, so shoot me a message if you're down to chat.
Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.
One ring to rule them all
You submitted an FML that was successfully published on the website. This makes you an exceptional human being.
You’ve used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…
Today, I was helping my friend create an online dating profile. When she got her search results, her #1 match was a blonde guy only 10 miles from her. His description: genuine, laid back, and ready for fun. He left off something kind of important. He's already married. To me. FML
Today, after reading a sign at the airport, my 6-year-old son thought it would be funny to yell, "Daddy's got a bomb!" Airport security then tackled me to the ground. Oh, and I missed my flight and my mother's birthday. FML
Today, I was lying in bed, trying to sleep, when I heard my parents having sex, so I put on my headphones. After listening to music for a good long while, I figured they were done by now, so I took off the headphones just in time to hear them finish. FML
Today, I went into my older brother's room to get a condom. This happened the other day too when my boyfriend forgot one. So I went in there today and there was a note that said "Little Sister, stop using my condoms. And your boyfriend sounds like a girl when he climaxes." FML
Friday 30 January 2015