Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

mutantcow

Search for a member

mutantcow

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 9 March 1994 (20 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 19605
  • Number of comments : 49
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About mutantcow : hello. :D

mutantcow's page activity

Visits<b>datuglykorean</b> - the 05/31/2014 at 7:19pm<b>king_of_LA</b> - the 03/24/2014 at 9:24pm<b>KyngJulian</b> - the 01/18/2014 at 3:27pm<b>FamousPeace</b> - the 10/13/2013 at 10:31am<b>kingtice</b> - the 08/04/2013 at 12:04am<b>Torrixx</b> - the 07/02/2013 at 6:20pm<b>AGB10</b> - the 06/03/2013 at 1:16am<b>qwillis98</b> - the 02/04/2013 at 10:17pm<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 10:02pm<b>RedPillSucks</b> - the 06/29/2010 at 11:44pm<b>stephen_lee</b> - the 05/03/2010 at 12:34pm<b>22jrdn55</b> - the 04/21/2010 at 1:28pm<b>unmadebed</b> - the 04/17/2010 at 9:23pm<b>ILIEKGIRLS</b> - the 04/17/2010 at 1:38pm<b>unluckyluis</b> - the 04/15/2010 at 12:29pm<b>cummlns</b> - the 04/15/2010 at 11:41am<b>knight0748</b> - the 04/14/2010 at 10:40pm<b>runo</b> - the 04/08/2010 at 4:10am

mutantcow's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

mutantcow's favorite FMLs

Today, I've recently gained weight so I bought an exercise video. I started it right away in my room on the top floor. My younger sister screamed and ran outside a few minutes later. She thought it was an earthquake. FML

#11865183
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34298) - you deserved it (9373)

On 07/14/2010 at 12:32am - health - by sarah - United States

Today, I got my sister to pluck my eyebrows. She shaped them wrong, so now I look constantly sad. FML

#11849273
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17114) - you deserved it (25947)

On 07/13/2010 at 11:02am - misc - by OhNo - United Kingdom (Sheffield)

Today, I fell asleep after finishing my exam. I had a dream I was falling and woke up smashing my face on the desk. Everyone laughed. FML

#7459742
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21821) - you deserved it (7710)

On 01/20/2010 at 6:19pm - health - by M_Kclift1994 (woman) - United States (Rhode Island)

Today, my friends thought it would be funny to try and break a watermelon on my head while I was asleep on the couch. FML

#7334131
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29161) - you deserved it (3281)

On 01/14/2010 at 3:46am - misc - by melonhead (man) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I went to visit my aunt who recently was released from an institution. She had leftover Christmas cookies so I began snacking on them. They tasted a bit off so I inquired about the ingredients. She told me they only had white icing so she used Crayola markers to give them color. FML

#7101732
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24564) - you deserved it (5149)

On 01/02/2010 at 8:33am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I had one more gift to buy: a copy of Fight Club. I asked a person working at Best Buy if they had any in stock. The man wouldn't sell me the last copy because I had broken the first two rules. FML

#6923345
189 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26736) - you deserved it (11839)

On 12/24/2009 at 3:10pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, it was the last day of finals. After sleeping less than three hours in the last two days, I got in the car to go to school. For a second, I thought my steering wheel, the gas pedal, and brake pedal were all missing. That's when I realized I was sitting in the back seat. FML

#6692026
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28989) - you deserved it (12414)

On 12/10/2009 at 8:08am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was taking a placement test for the new college I am going to. After the test and picking up a few numbers, I left with great pride. I opened the door and started walking out. I then realized that I had walked into the closet. FML

#6632044
45 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9327) - you deserved it (23890)

On 12/06/2009 at 9:58am - misc - by Wrongdoor (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, a doctor examined my wrist, which is completely swollen and painful. He diagnosed a case of tendonitis and asked me, "Do you use this hand for a particular sort of sport?" I just smiled like a twit. FML

#6480683
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8570) - you deserved it (43114)

On 11/27/2009 at 4:24pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I learned that as adorable as it might be to watch your cat follow your cursor around the screen, the humor ends when she dives into and breaks the monitor. FML

#6458973
39 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9433) - you deserved it (23852)

On 11/26/2009 at 4:22am - animals - by MouseChaser (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I found out that the plant in my kitchen that I have been watering for almost 2 years is fake. FML

#6453438
29 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9469) - you deserved it (48710)

On 11/25/2009 at 9:41pm - misc - by IlikeGreenPlants (woman) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I wore my cool new shirt with an oriental character on it to class. The Chinese TA burst into laughter and told me the shirt read, "I am a sad, pathetic person." FML

#6301645
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10486) - you deserved it (36995)

On 11/14/2009 at 2:48pm - misc - by Molly (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, I told my boyfriend how happy I was with him. He responded by pulling down his pants and slapping his ass. I have no idea what that was supposed to mean. FML

#6268851
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32707) - you deserved it (5389)

On 11/12/2009 at 2:11am - love - by neuroticallyours (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, my husband left his cell phone at home. I looked through his contacts and found a person named "The Bitch." Being a very curious person, I decided to call "The Bitch" to see who it was. My phone rang. FML

#6192797
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36350) - you deserved it (15126)

On 11/07/2009 at 5:22am - misc - by badwife (woman) - Japan



Zach Stafford's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Zach's illustrated FML
  • Everybody's talking about Ebola at the moment. I have trouble keeping up with the latest trends. I'm going to wait until Christmas and see what special offers turn up in the shops, under funky new names…

Friday 17 October 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: