Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

mutantcow

Search for a member

mutantcow

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 9 March 1994 (20 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 19734
  • Number of comments : 49
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About mutantcow : hello. :D

mutantcow's page activity

Visits<b>sdlr32787</b> - the 12/15/2014 at 1:57pm<b>eddie367</b> - the 12/09/2014 at 2:58pm<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - the 12/07/2014 at 8:30am<b>datuglykorean</b> - the 05/31/2014 at 7:19pm<b>king_of_LA</b> - the 03/24/2014 at 9:24pm<b>KyngJulian</b> - the 01/18/2014 at 3:27pm<b>FamousPeace</b> - the 10/13/2013 at 10:31am<b>kingtice</b> - the 08/04/2013 at 12:04am<b>Torrixx</b> - the 07/02/2013 at 6:20pm<b>AGB10</b> - the 06/03/2013 at 1:16am<b>qwillis98</b> - the 02/04/2013 at 10:17pm<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 10:02pm<b>RedPillSucks</b> - the 06/29/2010 at 11:44pm<b>stephen_lee</b> - the 05/03/2010 at 12:34pm<b>22jrdn55</b> - the 04/21/2010 at 1:28pm<b>unmadebed</b> - the 04/17/2010 at 9:23pm<b>ILIEKGIRLS</b> - the 04/17/2010 at 1:38pm<b>unluckyluis</b> - the 04/15/2010 at 12:29pm

mutantcow's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

mutantcow's favorite FMLs

Today, I've recently gained weight so I bought an exercise video. I started it right away in my room on the top floor. My younger sister screamed and ran outside a few minutes later. She thought it was an earthquake. FML

#11865183
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34359) - you deserved it (9386)

On 07/14/2010 at 12:32am - health - by sarah - United States

Today, I got my sister to pluck my eyebrows. She shaped them wrong, so now I look constantly sad. FML

#11849273
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17144) - you deserved it (25976)

On 07/13/2010 at 11:02am - misc - by OhNo - United Kingdom (Sheffield)

Today, I fell asleep after finishing my exam. I had a dream I was falling and woke up smashing my face on the desk. Everyone laughed. FML

#7459742
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21875) - you deserved it (7715)

On 01/20/2010 at 6:19pm - health - by M_Kclift1994 (woman) - United States (Rhode Island)

Today, my friends thought it would be funny to try and break a watermelon on my head while I was asleep on the couch. FML

#7334131
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30134) - you deserved it (3349)

On 01/14/2010 at 3:46am - misc - by melonhead (man) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I went to visit my aunt who recently was released from an institution. She had leftover Christmas cookies so I began snacking on them. They tasted a bit off so I inquired about the ingredients. She told me they only had white icing so she used Crayola markers to give them color. FML

#7101732
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24626) - you deserved it (5155)

On 01/02/2010 at 8:33am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I had one more gift to buy: a copy of Fight Club. I asked a person working at Best Buy if they had any in stock. The man wouldn't sell me the last copy because I had broken the first two rules. FML

#6923345
189 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26803) - you deserved it (11854)

On 12/24/2009 at 3:10pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, it was the last day of finals. After sleeping less than three hours in the last two days, I got in the car to go to school. For a second, I thought my steering wheel, the gas pedal, and brake pedal were all missing. That's when I realized I was sitting in the back seat. FML

#6692026
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29044) - you deserved it (12425)

On 12/10/2009 at 8:08am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was taking a placement test for the new college I am going to. After the test and picking up a few numbers, I left with great pride. I opened the door and started walking out. I then realized that I had walked into the closet. FML

#6632044
45 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9350) - you deserved it (23949)

On 12/06/2009 at 9:58am - misc - by Wrongdoor (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, a doctor examined my wrist, which is completely swollen and painful. He diagnosed a case of tendonitis and asked me, "Do you use this hand for a particular sort of sport?" I just smiled like a twit. FML

#6480683
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8592) - you deserved it (43160)

On 11/27/2009 at 4:24pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I learned that as adorable as it might be to watch your cat follow your cursor around the screen, the humor ends when she dives into and breaks the monitor. FML

#6458973
39 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9443) - you deserved it (23880)

On 11/26/2009 at 4:22am - animals - by MouseChaser (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I found out that the plant in my kitchen that I have been watering for almost 2 years is fake. FML

#6453438
29 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9488) - you deserved it (48789)

On 11/25/2009 at 9:41pm - misc - by IlikeGreenPlants (woman) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I wore my cool new shirt with an oriental character on it to class. The Chinese TA burst into laughter and told me the shirt read, "I am a sad, pathetic person." FML

#6301645
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10509) - you deserved it (37047)

On 11/14/2009 at 2:48pm - misc - by Molly (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, I told my boyfriend how happy I was with him. He responded by pulling down his pants and slapping his ass. I have no idea what that was supposed to mean. FML

#6268851
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32764) - you deserved it (5392)

On 11/12/2009 at 2:11am - love - by neuroticallyours (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, my husband left his cell phone at home. I looked through his contacts and found a person named "The Bitch." Being a very curious person, I decided to call "The Bitch" to see who it was. My phone rang. FML

#6192797
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36403) - you deserved it (15146)

On 11/07/2009 at 5:22am - misc - by badwife (woman) - Japan



FML's blog

  • Malec's illustrated FML
  • Life is like a box of chocolate full of piece of rabbit droppings sometimes, isn't it? OK, I'll admit that's a weird way to start an article a few days before Christmas. Let me explain: you try and get…

Friday 12 December 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: