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  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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mutantcow

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mutantcow
  • Town/Country : Boston, United States of America
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 9 March 1994 (17 years)
  • Number of visits : 18004
  • Number of comments : 49
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About mutantcow : hello. :D

mutantcow's last visitors

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How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

mutantcow's favorite FMLs

Today, I've recently gained weight so I bought an exercise video. I started it right away in my room on the top floor. My younger sister screamed and ran outside a few minutes later. She thought it was an earthquake. FML

#11865183 (122)

I agree, your life sucks (26333) - you deserved it (6840)

On 07/14/2010 at 12:32am - health - by sarah - United States

Today, I got my sister to pluck my eyebrows. She shaped them wrong, so now I look constantly sad. FML

#11849273 (218)

I agree, your life sucks (13242) - you deserved it (17899)

On 07/13/2010 at 11:02am - misc - by OhNo - United Kingdom (Sheffield)

Today, my physics teacher accidentally lit me on fire. FML

#9184901 (388)

I agree, your life sucks (42933) - you deserved it (4389)

On 03/18/2010 at 11:22am - health - by human torch - United States

Today, I fell asleep after finishing my exam. I had a dream I was falling and woke up smashing my face on the desk. Everyone laughed. FML

#7459742 (113)

I agree, your life sucks (15138) - you deserved it (5792)

On 01/20/2010 at 6:19pm - health - by M_Kclift1994 (woman) - United States (Rhode Island)

Today, my friends thought it would be funny to try and break a watermelon on my head while I was asleep on the couch. FML

#7334131 (105)

I agree, your life sucks (21834) - you deserved it (2384)

On 01/14/2010 at 3:46am - misc - by melonhead (man) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I went to visit my aunt who recently was released from an institution. She had leftover Christmas cookies so I began snacking on them. They tasted a bit off so I inquired about the ingredients. She told me they only had white icing so she used Crayola markers to give them color. FML

#7101732 (84)

I agree, your life sucks (16994) - you deserved it (3613)

On 01/02/2010 at 8:33am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I had one more gift to buy: a copy of 'Fight Club'. I asked a person working at Best Buy if they had any in stock. The man wouldn't sell me the last copy because I had broken the first two rules. FML

#6923345 (213)

I agree, your life sucks (18600) - you deserved it (8590)

On 12/24/2009 at 3:10pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, it was the last day of finals. After sleeping less than three hours in the last two days, I got in the car to go to school. For a second, I thought my steering wheel, the gas pedal, and brake pedal were all missing. That's when I realized I was sitting in the back seat. FML

#6692026 (112)

I agree, your life sucks (20884) - you deserved it (9042)

On 12/10/2009 at 8:08am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Illinois)

Today, I mailed out all my Christmas cards. As I was relaxing and being impressed with myself for being so organized this year, I saw the stack of Christmas cards on the coffee table. Everyone will be receiving an empty envelope for Christmas this year. FML

#6680637 (79)

I agree, your life sucks (6074) - you deserved it (22778)

On 12/09/2009 at 1:58pm - misc - by ChristmasCardDork (woman) - United States (Hawaii)

Today, I was taking a placement test for the new college I am going to. After the test and picking up a few numbers, I left with great pride. I opened the door and started walking out. I then realized that I had walked into the closet. FML

#6632044 (69)

I agree, your life sucks (6422) - you deserved it (15128)

On 12/06/2009 at 9:58am - misc - by Wrongdoor (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, a doctor examined my wrist, which is completely swollen and painful. He diagnosed a case of tendonitis and asked me, "Do you use this hand for a particular sort of sport?" I just smiled like a twit. FML

#6480683 (159)

I agree, your life sucks (6006) - you deserved it (30974)

On 11/27/2009 at 4:24pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I learned that as adorable as it might be to watch your cat follow your cursor around the screen, the humor ends when she dives into and breaks the monitor. FML

#6458973 (54)

I agree, your life sucks (6425) - you deserved it (15263)

On 11/26/2009 at 4:22am - animals - by MouseChaser (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I found out that the plant in my kitchen that I have been watering for almost 2 years is fake. FML

#6453438 (62)

I agree, your life sucks (6496) - you deserved it (34024)

On 11/25/2009 at 9:41pm - misc - by IlikeGreenPlants (woman) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I wore my cool new shirt with an oriental character on it to class. The Chinese TA burst into laughter and told me the shirt read, "I am a sad, pathetic person." FML

#6301645 (140)

I agree, your life sucks (7474) - you deserved it (26017)

On 11/14/2009 at 2:48pm - misc - by Molly (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, I told my boyfriend how happy I was with him. He responded by pulling down his pants and slapping his ass. I have no idea what that was supposed to mean. FML

#6268851 (163)

I agree, your life sucks (25208) - you deserved it (4101)

On 11/12/2009 at 2:11am - love - by neuroticallyours (woman) - United States (Virginia)