About mustang95 : Just you average southern country boy. Message me if you have any questions.
Hard at Work
Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.
Socialite
You’ve used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…
Beginner
You have looked through 5 pages of the website. That’s a start.
Today, after a particularly difficult late night workout at the gym, I decided to shower in the locker room. I must have passed out, because I later woke up naked, surrounded by police after someone called to report a dead body in the shower. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21443) - you deserved it (2014)
On 07/09/2012 at 3:06am - misc - by wetandnaked (woman) - United States (California)
Today, my wife is giving birth to our first born. I am an officer stationed overseas. Apparently, I am not only missing the birth, but I also missed the conception. FML
I agree, your life sucks (46663) - you deserved it (222)
On 07/08/2012 at 8:30pm - love - by moodyreallyrocks - United States (Kentucky)
Today, my boyfriend of seven months and I were looking at some pictures on his iPad. I saw a picture of a kid of about two years old that looked a little like him. I jokingly said, "What, is that your son?" Imagine my surprise when he said that it was. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20658) - you deserved it (2355)
On 07/08/2012 at 8:42am - love - by confusedbutloved (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, I woke up early and spent hours baking and icing a three-tier cake for my friend's eighteenth birthday, which is this evening. I just found out my mother threw it in the compost bin because she's on a diet and it was "tempting" her. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28215) - you deserved it (1266)
On 07/08/2012 at 2:58am - misc - by JadedBaker (woman) - United States
Today, I watched as my dad noticed a spider on the ceiling. Instead of getting a shoe, he pulled out a 9mm and shot it. I'm not sure if this is an epic win or a sign that my family is crazy. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23777) - you deserved it (2627)
On 07/07/2012 at 2:10am - misc - by kalikanna - United States (New Jersey)
Today, I bought a home at a bargain. It will need 5 grand in repairs to fix plumbing and electric, but it's mine. When I pulled up the listing to show pictures to my friends, there was a new listing that was in the same neighborhood, and a larger, nicer house that is move in ready. Same price. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17865) - you deserved it (3512)
Today, I woke up to a nude picture of my girlfriend. Once I looked at it my morning wood went away. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26323) - you deserved it (7265)
On 07/03/2012 at 1:33pm - intimacy - by bob - United States (Ohio)
Today, as I was getting ready to go to the midnight premiere of the new Spiderman movie, I was actually bitten by a spider. He gets super powers and a hot girl, I swell up like a balloon and get to spend the night in the hospital. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20635) - you deserved it (1406)
On 07/03/2012 at 4:03am - misc - by spiderfail - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, I saw my best friend, who's a cop. He was dressed up in regular clothes and with six other guys. I said, "Officer T.? Didn't you have work today?" Turns out he was undercover, and I blew his investigation. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14038) - you deserved it (29680)
On 07/01/2012 at 4:45am - misc - by immabitch - United States
Today, I was T-boned at an intersection. In an ambulance. On the way to the hospital after being T-boned at an intersection. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28899) - you deserved it (1137)
Today, I saw my girlfriend walking hand-in-hand down the street with another man. When I confronted her, she claimed she had no idea who I was, and the guy told me to beat it. Later on, she returned to our apartment and actually tried to act as if nothing had happened. FML
I agree, your life sucks (35082) - you deserved it (1736)
On 06/29/2012 at 9:06pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I found out just how easy it is to be launched against the wall and sucker-punched into oblivion by a 200-pound former Marine turned professional body-builder. I discovered this after I told my fiancée's dad that we were expecting a baby. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19967) - you deserved it (3567)
On 06/29/2012 at 7:57pm - health - by fuckjuggalos (man) - United States (Oregon)
Today, I realized just how much of a bitch I am when I grounded my son for not telling me what he got me for my birthday. FML
I agree, your life sucks (4278) - you deserved it (57294)
On 06/28/2012 at 4:29pm - kids - by MeanMother - United States (Missouri)
Today, my boyfriend finally met my brother. He arrested him for drunk driving. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18647) - you deserved it (2216)
On 06/28/2012 at 2:11pm - love - by daniella101 - United States (Louisiana)
Today, I had to have a long and awkward meeting with my boss. It wouldn't have been too awkward though, if I didn't have to avoid staring at her exposed breast whilst she fed her 8 week old baby. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17330) - you deserved it (3495)
On 06/27/2012 at 6:32am - work - by Wubba87 (man) - United Kingdom (Liverpool)
Monday 20 May 2013
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