About mustang95 : Just you average southern country boy. Message me if you have any questions.
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Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.
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Beginner
You have looked through 5 pages of the website. That’s a start.
Today, my girlfriend asked if her friend Alex from high school could join in with us and we could have an amazing threesome. As a horny dude how could I say no? Turns out Alex is also a guys name. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11662) - you deserved it (49464)
On 02/02/2009 at 11:29am - intimacy - by Randy Savage (man) - United States (New Jersey)
Today, my boyfriend called me by his mother's name for the 100th time. I'm a guy. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26297) - you deserved it (6977)
On 02/01/2009 at 2:01pm - love - by someonevexed - Germany (Baden-Wurttemberg)
Today, I was at a bar in Canada and was really hitting it off with a girl. She asked how big my junk was and I told her in inches... They use centimeters. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17483) - you deserved it (33197)
On 01/29/2009 at 10:32am - intimacy - by KD - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, at lunch, I told a bunch of people how I had been in love with this guy since freshman year. I made a bunch of jokes about how I was going to marry him and our kids would be so attractive. He was at the table next to mine and looked back at me as soon as I finished. FML
I agree, your life sucks (10606) - you deserved it (10444)
On 01/23/2009 at 12:31pm - love - by Noname - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, in class, I asked my teacher for a "rubber". I didn't realise that in America "rubber" doesn't mean "eraser", it means condom. FML
I agree, your life sucks (50194) - you deserved it (6941)
On 01/22/2009 at 7:42pm - intimacy - by TheEnglishOne - United States (California)
Today, I was woken out of my drunken state by a guy trying to stick his penis in my mouth. I'm a guy. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23250) - you deserved it (4246)
On 01/22/2009 at 6:21pm - misc - by Noname - Canada (Alberta)
Today, my girlfriend offered a blow job, but my hair got stuck in her braces so instead we tried to pull them all out. And no, I didn't get any. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21297) - you deserved it (8610)
On 01/18/2009 at 10:20pm - intimacy - by gjh - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, at a party, I watched the guy I've liked for AGES come out of a bedroom with one of my gay male friends. They were in there for a while. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16463) - you deserved it (1545)
On 01/17/2009 at 6:17pm - love - by C2 - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, the guy I've secretly been in love with for years told me how hot my brother is. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17452) - you deserved it (1433)
On 01/17/2009 at 2:49pm - love - by Shantoya - United States (Oklahoma)
Today, I was walking with my girlfriend, when she walked ahead of me cat-walk style, turned around and said, "Do you think I could model?" I blurted out, "Yes... for a plus-size clothing line." FML
I agree, your life sucks (3766) - you deserved it (33262)
On 01/17/2009 at 8:15am - love - by FailMan - United States (Connecticut)
Today, I was naked in bed. I was eating vanilla yogurt and it spilt. My dad walked in and then apologized that he had walked in on me while I was masturbating. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13164) - you deserved it (6344)
On 01/16/2009 at 5:10pm - misc - by stellarshaun - United States (California)
Today, I found my car completely vandalized when I came home from work. A paper on the seat read "That's for what you did to Hannah you fuck". Hannah? FML
I agree, your life sucks (25401) - you deserved it (1000)
On 01/15/2009 at 6:32pm - love - by Camm. - United States (New York)
Today, I'm flying out of the country in a few hours. A plane from the same airline just crashed into the Hudson River and is now floating in it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13672) - you deserved it (1413)
On 01/15/2009 at 10:05am - misc - by Tom - United States (New Jersey)
Today, I fell asleep on the train, totally wiped out after last night's party, which involved lots of booze and spicy Indian food. I wake up and notice a small boy staring at me, so I smiled at him. He turned to his father and said, "Daddy, the farting man has just woken up." FML
I agree, your life sucks (14406) - you deserved it (6629)
On 01/10/2009 at 9:11pm - kids - by mark - Sent from mobile version
Today, while I was looking for a file on my boyfriend's hard drive, I came across photos of a half-naked woman wearing my clothes, but whose head wasn't really visible. When I demanded an explanation, I realised that it wasn't another girl - it was him. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22661) - you deserved it (1918)
On 12/23/2008 at 11:11pm - love - by Lililaloose - Sent from mobile version
Friday 24 May 2013
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