Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

mustang95

Search for a member

mustang95

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 15 August 1995 (19 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 3574
  • Number of comments : 11
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About mustang95 : Just you average southern country boy. Message me if you have any questions.

mustang95's page activity

Visits<b>ale2309</b> - the 10/04/2014 at 6:13pm<b>jazzybrar</b> - the 09/10/2014 at 7:54pm<b>curticus</b> - the 06/04/2014 at 10:18pm<b>tagallopes</b> - the 05/04/2014 at 3:23pm<b>jcroisdale</b> - the 04/29/2014 at 3:14pm<b>xxdreamloverxx</b> - the 02/21/2014 at 12:08pm<b>xx_moonwalker_xx</b> - the 11/07/2013 at 8:34am<b>Girosrabing</b> - the 10/26/2013 at 7:58pm<b>kingofks</b> - the 10/11/2013 at 2:15am<b>azan1</b> - the 05/07/2013 at 4:31pm<b>jetpackzach</b> - the 10/15/2012 at 12:17am

mustang95's FML badges

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

Socialite

You’ve used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…

Beginner

You have looked through 5 pages of the website. That’s a start.

See all of mustang95's badges

mustang95's favorite FMLs

Today, everyone found out about the strange but intense fetish I have for women physically lifting me. It all came out when my friend, a female bodybuilder, decided to grab and pick me up for a laugh. I came in my pants, in front of about twenty people. FML

#19983416
249 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38276) - you deserved it (8186)

On 07/25/2012 at 12:51pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, everyone found out about the strange but intense fetish I have for women physically lifting me. It all came out when my friend, a female bodybuilder, decided to grab and pick me up for a laugh. I came in my pants, in front of about twenty people. FML

#19983416
249 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38276) - you deserved it (8186)

On 07/25/2012 at 12:51pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, everyone found out about the strange but intense fetish I have for women physically lifting me. It all came out when my friend, a female bodybuilder, decided to grab and pick me up for a laugh. I came in my pants, in front of about twenty people. FML

#19983416
249 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38276) - you deserved it (8186)

On 07/25/2012 at 12:51pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, everyone found out about the strange but intense fetish I have for women physically lifting me. It all came out when my friend, a female bodybuilder, decided to grab and pick me up for a laugh. I came in my pants, in front of about twenty people. FML

#19983416
249 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38276) - you deserved it (8186)

On 07/25/2012 at 12:51pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I was in the hospital. I had recently broken my arm, and had to have it re-broken. I've secretly been a lesbian for years. Guess who came out to her strict Christian parents while on anesthetics. FML

#19982177
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31433) - you deserved it (4459)

On 07/24/2012 at 7:44pm - love - by Arthurie (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, my neighbor called me on vacation to tell me that she let my mother into my house to feed my fish. I don't have fish, and my mother passed away 3 years ago. FML

#19978365
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31508) - you deserved it (2131)

On 07/22/2012 at 11:48pm - misc - by My_Name_Is_Zach -

Today, my sister and I had a huge fight because I flushed the toilet while she was taking a bath. The faucet for the bath was not running, but she insisted that she felt the water in the tub turn "scalding hot." She won't listen when I try to explain to her that it doesn't work like that. FML

#19972921
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25526) - you deserved it (1725)

On 07/22/2012 at 2:54am - misc - by Raaaaage - United States (California)

Today, at the bank, my 8-year-old son decided to pull out realistic looking toy gun, and scream "FREEZE! Give me all your money!" The dim-witted bank teller pressed the silent alarm, and I was nearly arrested. FML

#19962934
274 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18040) - you deserved it (26313)

On 07/20/2012 at 6:20am - kids - by great - New Zealand (Waikato)

Today, I sat awkwardly and pretended like I didn't notice my cousin discreetly trying to masturbate while talking to me. This isn't the first time anything like this has happened. FML

#19956706
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32872) - you deserved it (3273)

On 07/18/2012 at 10:15pm - intimacy - by Awkward - United States (California)

Today, I went to the beach with a friend. We'd forgotten to get our towels out of the SUV, so I rushed back to the parking lot. I opened the passenger-side door and climbed in to begin my search. After ten seconds or so, I realized I'd busted into someone else's car. FML

#19954637
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18581) - you deserved it (5926)

On 07/18/2012 at 1:00pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was using a penis pump for the first time. It was awesome until it sucked my left testicle into the tube. I'll be singing soprano for a while now. FML

#19949637
283 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11416) - you deserved it (39235)

On 07/17/2012 at 11:32am - intimacy - by tuggernuts (man) - United States

Today, I was using a penis pump for the first time. It was awesome until it sucked my left testicle into the tube. I'll be singing soprano for a while now. FML

#19949637
283 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11416) - you deserved it (39235)

On 07/17/2012 at 11:32am - intimacy - by tuggernuts (man) - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I broke up after three years. I came home and when my dad asked what was wrong, I told him. His first reaction was, "Well damn it. Who'll go fishing with me now?" FML

#19948729
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24250) - you deserved it (2432)

On 07/17/2012 at 3:19am - love - by lovealways22 (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, while shopping, my six-year-old son threw a tantrum because I wouldn't buy him a video game. I ended up having to grab his arm and leave the store. He screamed that I was kidnapping him, at which point I was socked in the face and pinned to the floor by three bystanders. FML

#19942412
373 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35187) - you deserved it (3241)

On 07/15/2012 at 7:13pm - kids - by Zora (man) - Norway (Hordaland)

Today, my boyfriend and I were at a park, alone, late at night. Things were getting kind of heavy and he started undressing me, when we heard a loud "Hey!" and a flashlight coming through the bushes. My boyfriend then decided to ditch me, while still holding my shirt and bra. FML

#19935393
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28838) - you deserved it (8655)

On 07/14/2012 at 1:06am - intimacy - by anonymous - United States (Ohio)



Zach Stafford's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Zach's illustrated FML
  • Everybody's talking about Ebola at the moment. I have trouble keeping up with the latest trends. I'm going to wait until Christmas and see what special offers turn up in the shops, under funky new names…

Friday 17 October 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: