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mustang95

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mustang95
  • Town/Country : united states
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 15 August 1995 (17 years)
  • Number of visits : 531
  • Number of comments : 11
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About mustang95 : Just you average southern country boy. Message me if you have any questions.

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mustang95's FML badges

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

Socialite

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You have looked through 5 pages of the website. That’s a start.

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mustang95's favorite FMLs

Today, I went to go get a haircut and I asked how much it was for a haircut, shampoo, and a blow job. I meant to say blow dry. FML

#145421
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14102) - you deserved it (43011)

On 02/26/2009 at 6:21pm - misc - by Stixchop (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I knew my girlfriend was having a bad day. I went to bring her frozen yogurt at work because she loves it. When I was in the elevator, I overheard her colleague saying that the reason she was upset was because she had been cheating on her boyfriend with her new intern. FML

#142506
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (84210) - you deserved it (2680)

On 02/26/2009 at 12:01pm - love - by froyo (man) - United States

Today, at work, we finally got a digital projector so our theater can show 3D movies. Our first movie is The Jonas Brothers Concert. FML

#137064
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57731) - you deserved it (7189)

On 02/25/2009 at 8:31pm - misc - by Noname (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, everyone at school was talking about some guy that did another girl while he was going out with someone. I started to spread the rumor myself, until someone told me that that guy was my boyfriend. The other girl was my best friend. FML

#125458
35 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43981) - you deserved it (18248)

On 02/24/2009 at 6:28pm - misc - by LockandKey - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was discussing sex with my guy friends in their dorm when I asked one of them what he would do if I got naked and crawled into his bed. He replied, "Nothing. You're one of the guys now." They all agreed. FML

#113943
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53271) - you deserved it (17138)

On 02/23/2009 at 2:28pm - intimacy - by NeverGonnaGetAny (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I handed in an assignment in health class that had to calculate my BMI. Embarassed by my weight I put it 15 pounds less. I got the assignment back and lost credit for something. Circled in red pen on the top was you must put your "EXACT" weight. FML

#92098
42 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32020) - you deserved it (12269)

On 02/20/2009 at 9:49pm - work - by ohh jeez. - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my girlfriend and I were up late watching tv when an infomercial for "male enhancement" came on. I grabbed for my phone to make a call when my girlfriend said "O honey, dont buy that, it's okay that you're small." I was checking my voicemails. FML

#89031
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39306) - you deserved it (4505)

On 02/20/2009 at 3:15pm - misc - by allyshah - United States (District of Columbia)

Today, I walked through my college dorm and a freshman was watching some overly dramatic show on her laptop. I smiled and asked if it was a new episode of 'Gossip Girl.' She was on a video chat with her boyfriend. They were about to break up. FML

#74742
24 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8799) - you deserved it (33830)

On 02/19/2009 at 12:22am - love - by baddormgirl (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I was masturbating on my inflatable air mattress that squeaks when you move. Suddenly, my mom busted in my room to ask if I'm okay because she thought the squeaking was my crying. I ripped my hands from my pants and turned on my side; she walked over and grabbed my hands to console me. FML

#70419
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20313) - you deserved it (48478)

On 02/18/2009 at 6:01pm - intimacy - by dirtyhands (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I was eating at a restaurant with my boyfriend, he is 6'2 and i am 4'11. Out of nowhere, the hostess started openly flirting with him, and asked him if he needed a booster chair for his daughter. FML

#70392
188 comments

I agree, your life sucks (62207) - you deserved it (3410)

On 02/18/2009 at 5:57pm - misc - by not-so-young-shortie (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, I was a host during kids' event. I did my job and started to do some funny moves to entertain the kids. I was wearing a top with a really low cut. Then noticed that all the children were pointing at me happily and adults looked surprised. Then I noticed that both my boobs had popped out. FML

#46183
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8037) - you deserved it (40239)

On 02/15/2009 at 10:49am - misc - by Nastiaa (woman) - Estonia (Harjumaa)

Today, I ran over a beer bottle which popped my car tire, which then caused me to swerve into a police cruiser. FML

#46008
28 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48410) - you deserved it (2939)

On 02/15/2009 at 8:28am - misc - by andjusticeforall (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I logged onto facebook to realize that my boyfriend is now listed as single. News to me. FML

#13746
34 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36588) - you deserved it (2474)

On 02/07/2009 at 6:04pm - misc - by klv8 (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, while my 4 year old nephew was hugging me, he stepped back and declared, "Auntie, my Pee-do is hard, but it will go away." FML

#11033
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24780) - you deserved it (2139)

On 02/05/2009 at 8:30pm - misc - by Fag_Hag (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I sent my best friend Mike the link to a porn site we were talking about at a party. Turns out the name "Mom" is right next to "Mike" in my contacts list. FML

#9718
20 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10493) - you deserved it (37699)

On 02/05/2009 at 10:39am - intimacy - by menerethrr - United States (Virginia)



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