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mpsteve137

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mpsteve137

2Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 24 December 1991 (23 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 4963
  • Number of comments : 202
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 41 posted

About mpsteve137 : Haaa you don't really care

mpsteve137's page activity

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Liked!<b>patrickalamo</b> - the 01/09/2015 at 1:20pm<b>RainbowGirl123</b> - the 10/23/2014 at 1:48pm

mpsteve137's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

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You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

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Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.

See all of mpsteve137's badges

mpsteve137's favorite FMLs

Today, my teenage daughter asked me how old I was when I lost my virginity. I sarcastically replied that I'm still a virgin. She looked at me blankly and said, "Jeez, no wonder you're so uptight. You need to get laid, mom." FML

#20104739
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27032) - you deserved it (6949)

On 10/06/2012 at 8:05pm - kids - by TheVirginJenny - United States (Washington)

Today, I woke up after having a nightmare that my girlfriend broke up with me. Needing reassurance, I told her about it. She became furious with me saying that she'd never do that and called me an "inconsiderate fucking bastard for even thinking that." Then she broke up with me. FML

#20101222
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28169) - you deserved it (3281)

On 10/04/2012 at 10:44am - love - by Dave (man) - United States

Today, I was getting a bikini wax to prove to my husband that I could be sexy despite being five months pregnant. As the woman was applying the wax, she said, "You know, if I wanted to, I'm in the perfect spot to reach in and steal that baby." FML

#20097870
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27031) - you deserved it (3448)

On 10/02/2012 at 1:01am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, my mom decided the time was right to give me the sex talk. Towards the end, I had to excuse myself to the bathroom. As I came back, I overheard my dad telling my mom that I'm so unpopular, the only time I'll get laid is when I'm being put in a coffin. FML

#20091141
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36070) - you deserved it (2643)

On 09/27/2012 at 4:14pm - intimacy - by linn (woman) - United States

Today, I was trying to convince my flatmate to agree to let me get us a kitten. After gushing about how cute they are, and showing her loads of pictures, she just stared at me and said, "You really need a penis inside you now and again." FML

#20087001
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15767) - you deserved it (19817)

On 09/24/2012 at 7:12pm - intimacy - by foreveralone (woman) - United Kingdom (Cardiff)

Today, I spent hours crafting a tiara to look like the princess from my boyfriend's favourite game series, Zelda. I sent him a picture of me wearing it, and got the reply: "Sure, that's nice, but you'd be better as Majora." FML

#20079245
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19160) - you deserved it (3160)

On 09/19/2012 at 1:25pm - love - by MT (woman) - Finland

Today, I was pulled over. The cop stated that he "couldn't see" me because I had "blended in with the dark car background", and that it looked like no one was driving. I was literally pulled over for being black. FML

#20068526
209 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44713) - you deserved it (3897)

On 09/12/2012 at 3:00am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I realized that my manager and I have synchronized menstrual cycles. She gets extremely bitchy, and I get extremely vulnerable and emotional - she yells at me and I burst into tears. FML

Today, during a family dinner, my favourite underwire bra got tired of its job and tried to shish-kebab my boobs. FML

#20065022
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20007) - you deserved it (1944)

On 09/09/2012 at 5:38pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, a woman came up to me at work and screamed at me for "taking forever" to come and wait at her table. I work at Wendy's. FML

#20056260
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23489) - you deserved it (1596)

On 09/03/2012 at 7:43pm - work - by FastFoodWaiter (man) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I was feeling depressed and got very, very drunk. This evening, I was feeling equally desperate, and ended up having to get my special dildo removed from my asshole at the hospital. FML

#20051425
204 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12396) - you deserved it (35912)

On 08/31/2012 at 8:23pm - intimacy - by pride? what's that? :( (woman) - Belgium (Vlaams-Brabant)

Today, I finally confronted my boyfriend and asked him if he was cheating on me. He got flustered and said, "Technically, I'm cheating with you, not on you." FML

#20049344
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31168) - you deserved it (2520)

On 08/30/2012 at 11:24am - love - by nice one (woman) -

Today, I received a call from my future sister in-law, telling me that she and her future husband had decided to hold their wedding ceremony on my birthday. I was told not to celebrate my birthday, as it would "take away the attention to the true meaning of the day." FML

Today, I accidentally decoded the system my parents use for talking about sex while I'm around. It's a substituion cipher, using literary references. As they're both lit. professors, this has me perpetually grossed-out and wondering, "Are they really talking about Anne Frank, or anal fisting?" FML

#20042325
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23958) - you deserved it (2078)

On 08/26/2012 at 5:21am - misc - by ewww (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, my dog was diagnosed with depression. I got him to help with my depression. I guess we can just be miserable together. FML

#20039193
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27490) - you deserved it (2534)

On 08/24/2012 at 11:45am - animals - by alix - United Kingdom (Buckinghamshire)



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