About mpsteve137 : Haaa you don't really care
An insomniac or a creature of the dark
You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.
Mobility
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Up and coming moderator
It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.
Today, I was riding my bike and stopped at a street light. A little girl looked at me, then asked her mother, "Mommy, why does that girl have a ring through her nose?" Her mother then replied, "Because her parents don't love her." FML
I agree, your life sucks (58170) - you deserved it (15637)
On 04/05/2009 at 3:33pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, I met a really attractive guy outside of a club. We came back to my apartment and had sex. Afterward, we both fell asleep. I woke up and found 20 dollars on my nightstand that wasn't there before. He thought I was a prostitute, and apparently a cheap one. FML
I agree, your life sucks (59605) - you deserved it (28261)
On 03/28/2009 at 1:33pm - intimacy - by Chelsea (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, I came home and saw on our fridge, "Please don't drink anymore, I really worry about your health" written by my 7-year-old daughter. I figured she wouldn't ever find out, so I opened the fridge. But I found another note on a can that said "So you're going to drink anyway?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (43148) - you deserved it (492573)
On 03/21/2009 at 12:46am - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Florida)
Today, I had one of the worst panic attacks in years. I was worried nobody cared about me and that I had completely messed up my life. I was hyperventilating and crying hysterically. My mom walked by my room, looked at me, and said, "If you're going to make those noises, at least shut the door." FML
I agree, your life sucks (159355) - you deserved it (19614)
On 03/15/2009 at 11:38pm - misc - by Screwed (woman) - United States (New Jersey)
Today, I was talking to my mom. During the conversation she asked me, "Does he take his leg off when you guys are having sex?" Referring to the guy I've been seeing who has a prosthetic leg. My dad then asked, "Does he beat you with it too if you've been naughty?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (189202) - you deserved it (21757)
On 03/04/2009 at 6:07pm - intimacy - by Girl123999 (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I had sex with my girlfriend. Being the stud that I am, after a short time I turned to her and said "You think you're ready for a round two?" She replied "No, but I do think I'm ready for the rest of round one." FML
I agree, your life sucks (18246) - you deserved it (85161)
On 03/04/2009 at 2:03am - intimacy - by saddude (man) - United States (District of Columbia)
Today, my boyfriend and I decided to try anal sex. When he was done, I turned around to see him holding a strap-on with a smile on his face and said 'Now, do me'. FML
I agree, your life sucks (209595) - you deserved it (45110)
On 02/26/2009 at 12:57pm - intimacy - by Picaresque (woman) - United States (Missouri)
Today, I went to my crushes Mardi Gras party. He was handing out beads to all the girls at the party that flashed him. When he came around to me he stopped and said "I will give you these beads NOT to flash me." FML
I agree, your life sucks (45826) - you deserved it (3371)
On 02/25/2009 at 10:12pm - misc - by MADfml - United States (Virginia)
Today, my mom decided to give me relationship advice. She told me the key to a happy/successful relationship was "letting your man explore ALL your orifices." FML
I agree, your life sucks (37005) - you deserved it (2805)
On 02/25/2009 at 12:35am - misc - by Noname (woman) - United States (Oklahoma)
Today, my mom decided to give me relationship advice. She told me the key to a happy/successful relationship was "letting your man explore ALL your orifices." FML
I agree, your life sucks (37005) - you deserved it (2805)
On 02/25/2009 at 12:35am - misc - by Noname (woman) - United States (Oklahoma)
Today, I went to the gym and worked out with a trainer. While doing arm exercises he commented on how impressed he was with the size of my triceps. That really boosted my self-confidence, until he leaned in to feel them and said, "Oh, it's just fat." FML
I agree, your life sucks (34858) - you deserved it (5225)
On 02/24/2009 at 6:14pm - health - by Sheezey (woman) - United States (California)
Today, my sister asked if she could look through my closet to find something to wear. She is 6 months pregnant. FML
I agree, your life sucks (36131) - you deserved it (7110)
On 02/19/2009 at 4:11pm - health - by Noname (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, I complimented my mom with "Hey, I think you lost some weight." She replied with "Yeah, I think you found it." FML
I agree, your life sucks (36126) - you deserved it (5024)
On 02/18/2009 at 4:09pm - health - by Kristina (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, I complimented my mom with "Hey, I think you lost some weight." She replied with "Yeah, I think you found it." FML
I agree, your life sucks (36126) - you deserved it (5024)
On 02/18/2009 at 4:09pm - health - by Kristina (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, my boyfriend and I broke up. I said that at least I was always there for him when he needed me. He said "When did I need you?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (25373) - you deserved it (4395)
On 02/12/2009 at 2:04am - misc - by rainyday (woman) - United States (California)
Monday 17 June 2013
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