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Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.
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Today, I rushed home during a torrential downpour. When I got back, I went to take a pee and took off my wet socks while I had the chance. Once I finished, I stood up with used toilet paper in one hand and wet socks in the other. Guess which I tossed into the toilet. FML
I agree, your life sucks (4976) - you deserved it (3412)
Today, I finally found out where my great grandmother's antique handheld mirror disappeared to. According to the headmaster, my eleven year old son has been using it to look up his classmates' dresses at school. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17755) - you deserved it (1824)
On 10/28/2011 at 8:25am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States
Today, I talked to my mom about hanging out with her. She got out her phone to schedule an appointment. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15908) - you deserved it (1608)
On 10/28/2011 at 12:17am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Ohio)
Today, my roomate informed me that her snake was missing in our apartment again. Apparently, I need to be careful because the snake's attracted to blood. I'm on my period. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22729) - you deserved it (1691)
On 10/27/2011 at 11:48pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Kentucky)
Today, my mother told me I'm going to get lung cancer. Because she smokes. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25420) - you deserved it (1619)
On 07/16/2011 at 8:19pm - health - by imobesejk (woman) - United States (Ohio)
Today, my girlfriend went down on me for the first time. Just as I was reaching climax my brother raced into the bathroom right next to my door and began to vomit extremely loudly. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25220) - you deserved it (3694)
On 03/05/2011 at 12:05am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Georgia)
Today, I took a picture of myself and put it on Facebook. After I did so, I realized that in the background, you can see my crush's Facebook page up on my laptop. He tagged himself. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12052) - you deserved it (33311)
On 02/24/2011 at 7:37pm - misc - by verasam01 (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, I spent hours fixing my favorite food for myself as a little treat. While dishing it up, I made a mess, so I wiped it up with a napkin. I went to throw the napkin away on the way to the table. I looked down and was still holding the napkin. I had thrown the plate of food away instead. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11066) - you deserved it (20595)
On 05/29/2010 at 3:00am - misc - by Intoxicunt (woman) - United States (Tennessee)
Today, my uncle died. It was also my grandpa's 85th birthday. His reaction to the death? "Best birthday gift ever!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (22533) - you deserved it (1689)
On 01/17/2010 at 10:58am - misc - by poppet2010 - Sent from mobile version
Today, the last person I invited to my birthday party called and said they couldn't come because another party "came up" and they "hope I understand". It's on December 31st. This happens every year without fail. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18459) - you deserved it (5972)
On 12/28/2009 at 4:37pm - misc - by ahh (woman) - United Kingdom
Today, I had to take a dump. While looking for a book to read, I sneezed. The force of the sneeze caused me to shit my pants. The glob of dung then ran down my leg before falling out of my shorts onto my carpet, all in less than 5 seconds. Nothing in my life has prepared me for this. FML
I agree, your life sucks (67410) - you deserved it (9583)
On 10/14/2009 at 1:01pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Florida)
Today, I left home to start my new life at University. Saying goodbye to my mother, the last thing she said to me was "Don't turn gay". I'm gay. FML
I agree, your life sucks (39444) - you deserved it (7629)
On 09/30/2009 at 5:31am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (East Sussex)
Today, my roommate came home and began changing clothes in the same room that my boyfriend and I were in. I quickly got annoyed and angry and when I began questioning her about it she just laughed while saying, "Oh relax, it's not like he's never seen me naked before." FML
I agree, your life sucks (48810) - you deserved it (2963)
On 07/24/2009 at 5:04am - love - by Sally (woman) - United States (Indiana)
Today, I had just a few dominoes left to complete the whole project that I've been working on for about three weeks. I pressed record on my video camera, flicked the first domino, and watched with pride. When it finished, I realized I hadn't actually pressed record. FML
I agree, your life sucks (36996) - you deserved it (22175)
On 06/10/2009 at 7:39am - misc - by DamnDominoes (woman) - United Arab Emirates (Dubai)
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