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monkeyCanDoMYJob

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monkeyCanDoMYJob

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 3404
  • Number of comments : 32
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About monkeyCanDoMYJob : I look nothing like my picture.

monkeyCanDoMYJob's page activity

Visits<b>JoeTheBow</b> - the 06/01/2013 at 5:27pm<b>missalice0306</b> - the 08/07/2012 at 10:39am<b>lmc94</b> - the 02/03/2012 at 12:14am<b>slim_lady</b> - the 01/17/2012 at 4:53pm<b>Riiley</b> - the 12/02/2011 at 3:08pm<b>lastsinglepanda</b> - the 11/30/2011 at 5:25pm<b>token_blackguy</b> - the 11/05/2011 at 11:30pm<b>cOnVeRsE94</b> - the 10/10/2011 at 3:40pm<b>Haganbottom234</b> - the 10/07/2011 at 7:33pm<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 9:05pm<b>WtfLoser</b> - the 08/30/2011 at 1:42pm<b>HappinessForFree</b> - the 02/11/2011 at 3:10pm<b>CherriBerri</b> - the 02/03/2011 at 8:19pm<b>Doortje</b> - the 02/03/2011 at 5:22pm<b>DocBastard</b> - the 01/02/2011 at 1:32am<b>sugarnspicee</b> - the 01/01/2011 at 11:40pm

monkeyCanDoMYJob's FML badges

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

Up and coming moderator

It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.

Perfectionist

Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.

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monkeyCanDoMYJob's favorite FMLs

Today, my girlfriend started to plan our wedding. We've been going out for 3 days. FML

#17794409
250 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40528) - you deserved it (4891)

On 09/21/2011 at 8:38am - love - by Anonymous - United Kingdom

Today, while at work, after reading more than 100 FMLs and moderating more than 500, I decided to write one of my own with the help of my boss, who had been standing next to me for over an hour. "How about being fired?" FML

Today, my mom made me teach my delusional gran web browsing. I barely made it to YouTube before she sneered at me, and told me to "stop pissing about before I smash your face in." Two hours and multiple slaps later, she still doesn't get what a URL is, and I fear for my life. FML

#17783230
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23770) - you deserved it (2588)

On 09/19/2011 at 8:46pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, while playing with a lighter, I jokingly told my boyfriend I would burn his mustache off. He responded by telling me he would burn off mine. FML

#17781306
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13003) - you deserved it (31853)

On 09/19/2011 at 4:27pm - love - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I was eating some popcorn with a guy, and I noticed a piece of hair coming out my mouth. I pulled it... and pulled it... and eventually some popcorn pieces came out attached to the end of the hair. I was so embarrassed, he tried to make me feel better by saying it looked like a magic trick. FML

#17708928
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28572) - you deserved it (3779)

On 09/10/2011 at 1:57am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I started my first day working at a toddler day care center. At one point I decided to play "got your nose" with one of the kids. It turns out this kid has a physical birth abnormality on his face. I got his nose... his prosthetic nose. FML

#17629318
194 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40976) - you deserved it (11517)

On 08/31/2011 at 12:04pm - kids - by MJjunior (man) - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, while playing with bubble wrap, I dislocated my thumb. FML

#17628790
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22333) - you deserved it (13119)

On 08/31/2011 at 10:02am - health - by Bigpoppa0507 - Canada

Today, I walked into my shed to find my daughter's boyfriend asleep. He was also completely duct-taped to the ceiling, with his face painted like a clown. FML

#17628781
221 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30876) - you deserved it (2969)

On 08/31/2011 at 10:00am - kids - by piece of shed - United States (New York)

Today, at work, I heard a weird sound coming from the ceiling. As I looked up to see what it was, a huge splash of water hit me in the face. I called mall maintenance to let them know. They told me they already knew about the leak... from the sewage line. FML

#17621192
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26518) - you deserved it (1940)

On 08/30/2011 at 1:35pm - work - by honeybee2487 - United States

Today, this girl who has been stalking me for almost 7 months sent me a 12 page text comparing her love for me with her passion for cheese. FML

#17547922
218 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33560) - you deserved it (3237)

On 08/22/2011 at 1:19pm - love - by Say Cheese - United States (Michigan)

Today, I married the man of my dreams. At the after-party, my psycho grandma stood up, called for quiet, and engaged in a long rant about how this was "the beginning of the end" and advising everyone that the secret to a successful marriage is "cheating, plain and simple". FML

#17539435
190 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29643) - you deserved it (2719)

On 08/21/2011 at 4:18pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (Kentucky)

Today, my beloved pet chicken ran away from home. I got so distraught that my dad offered to buy me dinner. Specifically, KFC. FML

#17538600
179 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27507) - you deserved it (5483)

On 08/21/2011 at 2:23pm - animals - by xXangelaXx - United States

Today, I learned the hard way that when a pierced, tattooed, and otherwise extremely stereotypical biker chick jokingly threatens to find you and beat you up if you don't call her back after a one-night stand, she's not actually joking. FML

#17531904
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13148) - you deserved it (43836)

On 08/20/2011 at 8:08pm - intimacy - by owmyhead (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, my brother told the family that if you pull on the dog's back foot then she always obeys. I later found my mom tugging on the dog's foot whispering "jump off a cliff" repeatedly. FML

#17531478
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26413) - you deserved it (2140)

On 08/20/2011 at 7:02pm - misc - by lala7 - United States

Today, I went to the movies. I was seated next to a woman who talked through the film and said: "Awwww" every time she saw a primate. I went to see 'Rise of Planet of the Apes'. FML

#17527301
184 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32561) - you deserved it (2703)

On 08/20/2011 at 5:54am - misc - by RensM (man) - New Zealand (Auckland)



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