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mongorian_beef

Offline (the 10/21/2014 at 7:46pm) | Search for a member

mongorian_beef

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  • Number of visits : 488
  • Number of comments : 1
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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mongorian_beef's FML badges

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

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mongorian_beef's favorite FMLs

Today, while on the bus, a friendly-looking guy smiled at me, so I smiled back. He then pointed at my teeth and said, "You gonna get those fixed, or just keep them as a conversation starter?" FML

Today, my college did a fire drill, and instructions were given by intercom in English and Spanish. The guy beside me mused: "If they say it in English and Mexican, why not say it in Black too?" That guy is my idiot brother, and he was dead serious. Sometimes I think our parents are related. FML

#21257016
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35281) - you deserved it (2921)

On 09/12/2014 at 4:47pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I won a gruelling fitness competition, only to find out the mystery prize was a voucher to get 10 free spray tans. I'm black. FML

#21249089
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46838) - you deserved it (3798)

On 08/31/2014 at 2:44pm - misc - by disappointedjamaican - United Kingdom (Coventry)

Today, I learned that while other people drunk call their exes, I drunk adopt cats. Seven cats, to be exact. FML

#21248352
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40851) - you deserved it (9484)

On 08/30/2014 at 7:56am - animals - by cat lady (woman) - Norway (Rogaland)

Today, as I was driving out of a parking lot, some douchebag yelled at me: "Nice car! Too bad you're so ugly!" It was my friend's car, so I don't even have that going for me. FML

#21246563
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36746) - you deserved it (2643)

On 08/27/2014 at 5:21pm - misc - by leem (woman) - Belgium (Antwerpen)

Today, while my teacher was demonstrating how to use the ultrasound equipment, we all figured out that I'm pregnant. FML

#21245451
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50617) - you deserved it (9734)

On 08/25/2014 at 10:37pm - health - by whotouchedyou1 - United States (Texas)

Today, I was playing Mario Kart with my wife. I threw a blue shell and it hit her. She then refused to speak to me for three hours straight until right before bedtime when she called me a bastard and told me to sleep on the couch. FML

#21244858
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42872) - you deserved it (7391)

On 08/25/2014 at 1:44am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, while on a tour bus, our guide told us that "Jimi Hendrix was like, uh, the Miley Cyrus of the '60s." I'm actually a committed pacifist, but I was already halfway out of my seat to choke the pimply-faced twat out before I managed to restrain myself. Now I'm scared of myself. FML

#21237562
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35352) - you deserved it (5011)

On 08/14/2014 at 5:13pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my husband and I attended a funeral. After the service, my phone vibrated. It was a text from my husband, saying "I've got mourning wood like you wouldn't believe! get it? MOURNING. haha :D" I looked up and saw him across the room, winking at me. Not the place, honey. FML

#21234106
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47867) - you deserved it (5556)

On 08/10/2014 at 3:26pm - intimacy - by jackie89 (woman) - United Kingdom (Cornwall)

Today, I was browsing the People of Walmart site, chuckling at all the weirdos on there, when I came across a picture of my mom. FML

#21214404
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50427) - you deserved it (6784)

On 07/19/2014 at 6:38pm - misc - by Death By Parent (woman) - United States

Today, my 3-year-old daughter asked me to carry her from the car to the house. I asked her for 3 kisses and a hug in return. She said she'd rather walk instead. FML

#21213512
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44650) - you deserved it (6052)

On 07/18/2014 at 10:56pm - kids - by kids say the darnedest things - United States (Colorado)

Today, I saw a drunk woman drop her purse in the street. I picked it up and went to give it to her, only for her to scream at me for being a thief. Then she started crying, apologized and hugged me, then got angry again, and finally threw up on me. FML

#21208109
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46220) - you deserved it (3764)

On 07/13/2014 at 5:14pm - misc - by all puked out (man) - Netherlands

Today, I overheard my mother talking to her friend, and using me as an example of how it's sometimes best to swallow. FML

#21196146
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46494) - you deserved it (4665)

On 07/02/2014 at 11:54am - intimacy - by unwanted daughter (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my sister ran into my room unannounced while I was on webcam with a potential employer. Before I could react, she looked at my screen, said "Damn, he's fucking hot." and flashed him. FML

#21191852
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52032) - you deserved it (4729)

On 06/28/2014 at 8:26pm - work - by justno - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I had a job interview where I was interrupted for using the word creative because there is "only one creator". FML

#21189976
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41031) - you deserved it (4173)

On 06/27/2014 at 2:11am - work - by IAMALITAHA (man) - United Kingdom (Newcastle upon Tyne)



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