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mitch714

Offline (the 11/04/2014 at 6:13pm) | Search for a member

mitch714

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Monday 22 June 1998 (16 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 291
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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mitch714's favorite FMLs

Today, after working mah shift at McDonalds, I went to clock in at mah dispatch job. During a 911 call, I blurted, ( Would u lyk to try the McRib while it's back? ) FML

#21023934
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46429) - you deserved it (8735)

On 01/10/2014 at 9:25pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, was first day as a male ceerleader in an attempt to flirt. Te girls were stronger tan me an it's now job to be trown in te air by girls. FML

#21017728
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42295) - you deserved it (34342)

On 01/05/2014 at 11:16am - love - by give me an F - United Kingdom (Nottinghamshire)

Today , I realized just how lonely I am when I tried to time mah ejaculation to happen right as the new year started. mega FML

#21012409
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50207) - you deserved it (11918)

On 01/01/2014 at 1:41am - intimacy - by Lonesome (man) - United States (Louisiana)

Today , I Went To Mah Bedroom For Some Alone Time While Mah Daughter Watched TV. I Didn't Realize That Mah IPad Was Still Connected To The Apple TV , Until I Hit Play On Some Porn And Heard A Scream From The Other Room. FML

#21008990
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25976) - you deserved it (53503)

On 12/29/2013 at 2:01am - kids - by ConfusedDad - United States

Today, in the lunch line at school, a kid literally ordered a "hamburger with extra swag." FML

#20950369
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44469) - you deserved it (3354)

On 11/08/2013 at 3:12pm - work - by thank god you'll only live once (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today... son came ome for te fift time saying e didn't get te job... wondering wat e did wrong. I lookd at is resumé; under special skills was... "Keeping it real." Apparently e saw it in a movie an tougt it would work. FML

#20928390
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41318) - you deserved it (5068)

On 10/21/2013 at 12:18am - kids - by Wheredigowrong - United States (Iowa)

I was aving dinner wit my boyfriend's family... and e was saying ow well is driving lessons r going. During tis conversation is mum told im to "stop blowing yur own trumpet." He replied... "If I could do tat... I wouldn't need Anna." His dad gave im a ig-five. FML

#20836995
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (66315) - you deserved it (8437)

On 08/14/2013 at 12:22pm - intimacy - by NoMoreTrumpetBlowing (woman) - United Kingdom

looool Today, wile cleaning ma ears wit Q-tips, I came in ma pants. FML

#20835942
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48269) - you deserved it (17216)

On 08/13/2013 at 7:53pm - intimacy - by ANON (man) - United States (California)

Today, After Swimming In The Pool, I Went Into The Shower. Little Did I Know That Mah Niece Was Hiding In There. She Excitedly Yelled "I Saw Yur Boobs!" Now Mah Nephew Won't Stop Crying Because He Didn't Get To See Them As Well. FML

#20831181
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51392) - you deserved it (4077)

On 08/10/2013 at 8:04pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Nevada)

TODAY, IN THE MIDDLE OF EXAMINING ME, MAH GYNECOLOGIST SUDDENLY TOOK A SHARP INTAKE OF BREATH AND VOMITED ON THE FLOOR. FML

#20826932
168 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56666) - you deserved it (15965)

On 08/08/2013 at 7:10am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - Latvia (Jelgavas)

Today I was working as a nursa and an aldarly man had just passad away !! As tha patiant's wifa was laaving sha said ( Thank you 4 taking such good cara of my husband !! ) Than I intanding to say ( Sorry 4 your loss ) said ( Thank you 4 your loss !! ) FML

#20758244
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47424) - you deserved it (8603)

On 07/01/2013 at 4:35pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, the people fixing my phone called to say that 4 some reason, my phone's SIM card has wiped all my contacts except 4 four, and they are doing there best to try and recover the rest. I had to explain to them that I only had four contacts to begin with. The guy laughed. FML

#20567905
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40837) - you deserved it (5269)

On 03/31/2013 at 3:00am - misc - by Mr.no contacts (man) - New Zealand (Auckland)

Today, Mah Son,ho Saams To Think That Ha Is A "gangsta" Daspita Baing Ahita Boy From Tha Suburbs, Criad Bacausa I Accidantally Burnad His Grillad Chaasa . Ha's 28 . FML

#20045566
207 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29938) - you deserved it (5733)

On 08/28/2012 at 12:29am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Quebec)

2day My Grandmoter Treatend To Kill Erself Wit A Banana. Se Ten Got Angry Wit Me Wen I Didn't Attempt To Get Te Banana Away From Er. My Mom Punisd Me Cuz I Didn't Take Te Situation Seriously Enoug. FML

#19806269
186 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28842) - you deserved it (2896)

On 06/18/2012 at 7:38am - misc - by DwarfFrog - United States

Today , I Accidentally Moaned My Own Name During Sex. FML

#18703291
240 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31870) - you deserved it (27498)

On 01/04/2012 at 1:43am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States



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