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I moderated this!
In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!
This isn't what should be happening
You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.
50 favourites
Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!
Today, my water broke while my boyfriend was breaking up with me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (64638) - you deserved it (5330)
On 05/08/2013 at 1:41am - health - by Carrie - United States (California)
Today, I was out jogging, when I saw a girl fall off her bike and start crying. I ran over to see if she was hurt. Apparently her neighbour thought I was trying to kidnap her, because he ran out with a baseball bat and threatened to beat me to death if I didn't get lost. FML
I agree, your life sucks (40077) - you deserved it (2124)
On 05/07/2013 at 4:21pm - kids - by bet a woman would've been thanked (man) - United Kingdom (Worcestershire)
Today, I turned 35. Because I'm still single, my sister bought me a cat to help start my "inevitable collection." FML
I agree, your life sucks (39188) - you deserved it (4917)
On 05/07/2013 at 4:17pm - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Ohio)
Today, I tried lying to my parents for the first time. My mother is a neuroscientist and my father is a psychologist. Somehow, they managed to make me admit that I was lying before I'd even finished. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27216) - you deserved it (35238)
On 05/06/2013 at 8:52pm - misc - by blondie107 - United States (Texas)
Today, I found out that my wife is having an affair with the same guy my ex-wife left me for. FML
I agree, your life sucks (75340) - you deserved it (4368)
On 05/06/2013 at 2:13pm - love - by Anonymous - Ireland (Donegal)
Today, I woke up to the sound of my newborn screaming. I frantically hopped out of bed and stumbled into the nursery where I was met by the priceless sight of my five-year-old daughter attempting to breastfeed her understandably frustrated little brother. FML
I agree, your life sucks (55916) - you deserved it (4776)
On 05/06/2013 at 2:29am - kids - by SkeetinKeaton (man) - United States
Today, my dad called me a "deadbeat loser" after I came back from my first day of voluntary rehab for my meth problem. He's never had a job in his life and sits on the sofa all day, smoking weed and playing video games, all on my mom's salary. FML
I agree, your life sucks (48538) - you deserved it (6739)
On 05/05/2013 at 11:53am - misc - by Anonymous - United States
Today, I tried to show my boyfriend's mom a picture of my prom dress on my phone. She scrolled to the right to find a picture of her son, naked. FML
I agree, your life sucks (32861) - you deserved it (61215)
On 05/05/2013 at 1:44am - intimacy - by beyondembarrassed - United States
Today, I finished a dance competition. With competitions, it requires you to wear a lot of makeup like false eyelashes and red lipstick. I went into a Starbucks to get a coffee and a boy around 18 asked me, in all seriousness, what my rate is for one night. FML
I agree, your life sucks (49517) - you deserved it (9332)
On 05/05/2013 at 1:01am - misc - by dancer, not a hooker... - Canada (British Columbia)
Today, my dumbass colleague was too lazy to go buy balloons for a party in recognition of our company's huge merger. Instead, he made condom balloons. Let's just say you don't make blow up condoms for a prestigious company event. A company whose CEO is named Dick. FML
I agree, your life sucks (45591) - you deserved it (3695)
On 05/05/2013 at 12:14am - work - by ADickySituation - United States (Illinois)
Today, I learned that my mother counts my jeans as two pairs when she counts how many she's putting in for a load of wash. I've gotten that fat. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20433) - you deserved it (31221)
On 05/04/2013 at 8:41pm - misc - by Fatty Fatty Fatso (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, I walked into the living room to find my 11-year-old daughter about to kiss her "not my boyfriend" on the lips. When I asked what she thought she was doing, she peeled a piece of scotch tape off her lips and said, "It's okay! We're using protection." FML
I agree, your life sucks (58077) - you deserved it (8180)
On 05/04/2013 at 8:51am - kids - by wtfmama (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)
Today, I caught my 14-year-old daughter stealing alcohol from me. After berating her for half-an-hour I finally said, "At least you're not doing drugs." She gave me a guilty smile and sheepishly said, "At least I'm not a prostitute?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (54567) - you deserved it (11085)
On 05/04/2013 at 3:22am - kids - by prostitott -
Today, walking by myself, I was caught up in a group of people that got arrested, and we all got fined for creating a public disturbance. When I explained I wasn't with them, the group backed me up. The police thought I was the ringleader, and now I have to go to court. FML
I agree, your life sucks (53020) - you deserved it (2713)
On 05/03/2013 at 9:14pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Netherlands
Today, marks the third week in which my girlfriend has gone without taking a shower. She does this every so often, taking showers roughly once per month. She's convinced baby wipes will "hold her over". FML
I agree, your life sucks (45936) - you deserved it (7557)
On 05/03/2013 at 1:16am - love - by SingleStrongArm - Canada (Ontario)
Friday 24 May 2013
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