About mishaparis : Hey there. Misha here. I have nothing better to do before bed than read FML.
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PS. I have fat fingers and the iPhone 4S keyboard is tiny, so don't judge.
Perfectionist
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I moderated this!
In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!
Up and coming moderator
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Today, my boyfriend introduced me to his parents. My boyfriend is Japanese, and I wanted to introduce myself in Japanese so I'd asked him. Little did I know he'd taught me how to say, "Hello, I love your son's cock." I almost got kicked out of their house. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22548) - you deserved it (3170)
On 09/16/2012 at 8:50pm - love - by painfetish8021 (woman) - United States (North Carolina)
Today, my boyfriend told me he still has the key to our mailbox, while being at the other part of the country. Not to worry though, he sent it over. By mail. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17168) - you deserved it (1201)
On 08/03/2012 at 7:28am - misc - by Lara (woman) - Italy (Toscana)
Today, while life-guarding, I had to explain to teenage boys that shoving objects up each others' butts and complaining that someone was giving them anal was inappropriate at a family facility in front of kids under the age of 10. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16207) - you deserved it (853)
On 07/31/2012 at 9:54pm - work - by kaitlyna15 - United States (Washington)
Today, I had to slowly explain to my boss that in some parts of the world, it's currently winter, due to the different hemispheres. He scoffed, accused me of "making shit up," and said that if I took him for a fool again, I'd be looking for a new job. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20420) - you deserved it (1372)
On 07/14/2012 at 6:47pm - work - by Anonymous - United States
Today, I went to the airport to pick up my long distance boyfriend. Having waited six months for this, I was stoked. After waiting for three hours and sending numerous messages, I was eventually informed I was a week early. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15627) - you deserved it (10441)
On 07/02/2012 at 11:45am - love - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (London, City of)
Today, I had my end of year physics exam. I wasn't sure about some stuff, so I hid my notes and textbook in the bathroom. Halfway through, I got up, went to the bathroom, and as soon as I picked up the book, forgot what I was looking for. I can't even cheat right. FML
I agree, your life sucks (4621) - you deserved it (34662)
On 07/02/2012 at 3:23am - misc - by Anonymous -
Today, at a job interview, my interviewer bent forward and I admired his ass. When he turned, I couldn't tell if he caught me or not. At the end of the interview he shook my hand in congratulations of getting the job, then said "Yes, I do work out." I have to see him everyday now. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7020) - you deserved it (22710)
On 06/26/2012 at 2:18am - work - by cmck932012 - United States (Georgia)
Today, at a job interview, my interviewer bent forward and I admired his ass. When he turned, I couldn't tell if he caught me or not. At the end of the interview he shook my hand in congratulations of getting the job, then said "Yes, I do work out." I have to see him everyday now. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7020) - you deserved it (22710)
On 06/26/2012 at 2:18am - work - by cmck932012 - United States (Georgia)
Today, I used a prank app, where you shake the cell, and it makes the screen looks cracked. I ended up losing my grip on the phone. It went flying, and it is now cracked for real. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7153) - you deserved it (21276)
On 06/10/2012 at 2:24am - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)
Today, after a very painful mouth surgery, I went home to take a nap. Then my nose started bleeding, so I stuck a tissue in it and fell asleep. When I woke up, I was so high from painkillers that when I saw the tissue, I thought it was a ghost. I screamed so loud I burst a stitch. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24370) - you deserved it (3291)
On 06/07/2012 at 2:12pm - health - by LaurenB (woman) - United States (New Hampshire)
Today, I had an admissions interview at my dream college. I spent hours practicing questions and picking the perfect outfit. It was not until after the interview that I realized I'd scratched a pimple while waiting, and my forehead had been smeared with blood the entire time. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21727) - you deserved it (2563)
On 06/07/2012 at 2:09pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (North Carolina)
Today, I woke up from a sexy dream about my boyfriend. Too bad I'd fallen asleep in my living room with my whole family over, grandma included. They were all staring. I'd been sleep humping and moaning. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25732) - you deserved it (3908)
On 06/07/2012 at 1:41pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Oregon)
Today, I had to take Viagra. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23810) - you deserved it (4494)
On 05/24/2012 at 1:42am - intimacy - by aaah. (man) - Canada (Saskatchewan)
Today, my daughter's bed broke. Trying to see the damage, I lay down on her floor to get a closer look. I saw mountains of condom boxes under there. Now I know why the bed broke. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28891) - you deserved it (3585)
On 05/19/2012 at 11:08am - intimacy - by maggierose171 - United States (Wisconsin)
Today, I was at the supermarket checkout. I handed over my items, which included some tampons, tissues, and toilet roll. The security guard standing beside the cashier remarked loudly, "I'll be damned; she's flowing from every hole!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (31308) - you deserved it (2939) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!
Monday 20 May 2013
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