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millx

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millx

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 9 August 1994 (20 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 137
  • Number of comments : 6
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About millx : I like to watch to world burn

millx's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

millx's favorite FMLs

Today, I was at the laundromat when a huge, tattoo-covered man wearing nothing but denim booty shorts and a wife-beater sat down beside me. He stared at me for a while, before telling me all about how I reminded him of his "first prison bitch." FML

#19644212
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25140) - you deserved it (1932)

On 05/18/2012 at 10:35pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, I was babysitting this 12 year old. We were watching a movie, and he was being an angel just laying with his head in my lap. He fell asleep so I closed my eyes and had a little nap. When I woke up he had taken my shirt off and was feeling up my boobs. FML

#19343662
363 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39426) - you deserved it (12188)

On 03/25/2012 at 8:09am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, my 18-year old son decided to run his hand over our wooden fence to try and get a splinter, as he "forgot what they felt like." Last month, he stabbed himself in the arm with a sewing needle because he "forgot what an injection feels like." I raised this idiot. FML

#19159270
191 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32143) - you deserved it (7760)

On 02/25/2012 at 6:25am - misc - by badmom (woman) - Ireland (Dublin)

Today, my dad and I got into a fight over who gets the last corner piece of the brownies. I ended up with a black eye and and a sprained wrist. He ended up with the brownie and ran away laughing. FML

#18275537
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24781) - you deserved it (6915)

On 11/17/2011 at 7:50pm - misc - by alliez108 - United States

Today, at some point, and for some reason I'll probably never fully understand, it seemed like a good idea to get completely shitfaced on tequila and try to shave my ballsack with a straight razor. I'm not sure if these wounds will ever heal. FML

#17334283
268 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11683) - you deserved it (65480)

On 08/01/2011 at 5:47pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, the police were canvassing my neighbourhood about a recent robbery. When I answered the door, my brother saw badges, panicked, and jumped out our apartment's third-storey window in an attempt to escape. He thought they were after him for using a bong two weeks ago. I'm related to this twit. FML

#17252613
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31483) - you deserved it (3099)

On 07/25/2011 at 10:10am - misc - by Bec (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I ran a red light in front of a cop and got pulled over. My friend thought it would be funny to throw a knife in my lap and scream "Help me officer, he has a knife!" FML

#15773415
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44443) - you deserved it (6715)

On 04/13/2011 at 6:57pm - misc - by FrOsTy25 -

Today, our class was focusing on discrimination, and our teacher asked us if anyone had ever felt discriminated against. I put my hand up to share a story, and my teacher immediately said "It's because you're ginger, isn't it?" That's not what I was going to say. FML

#13688243
239 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39055) - you deserved it (6988)

On 11/02/2010 at 1:43pm - misc - by gingerninja (woman) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I had to use my butthole to negotiate with my husband so I can get a new tattoo. FML

#12753768
272 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13696) - you deserved it (47726)

On 08/26/2010 at 9:32am - intimacy - by H8TR (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I fainted for the first time in my life. I was in the shower. With my girlfriend. Apparently, my brain and my erection had a battle for who got the most blood, and my erection won. FML

#6583595
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22074) - you deserved it (3157)

On 12/03/2009 at 12:50pm - intimacy - by Silent - United Kingdom (Hampshire)

Today, I parked downtown for a few minutes to pick up a pizza. As I was getting out of my car, a sketchy guy came up and asked me for $5. I told him to get lost and walked away. I walked back to the lot with my pizza and my car was gone. The sketchy guy was a parking attendent. He had my car towed. FML

#1251625
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12043) - you deserved it (63770)

On 04/23/2009 at 9:25am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I was teasing my little brother. Later that night, I went to the bathroom to wash up. While I'm brushing my teeth, my little brother slips a photo under the door that shows him scrubbing my toothbrush against his nuts. FML

#221601
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46462) - you deserved it (25476)

On 03/05/2009 at 9:27pm - misc - by mr.palendrome (man) - United States (New York)



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