About mikeymayhem_87 : In case you're wondering... I am a heavy metal zombie!! I enjoy tasty riffs!!
mikeymayhem_87's FML badges
You’ve used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…
Hard at Work
Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.
Why am I up so early?
You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.
mikeymayhem_87's favorite FMLs
Today, I was the 10th caller on a radio show. I answered the question correctly. The DJ informed I won a free air guitar of my choosing. I yelled with excitement over the air. The DJ then instructed me how to use my new air guitar. FML
by h4rdy / 03/09/2012 at 11:55am / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 03/06/2012 at 3:41pm / United States (Florida) / Kids
by sdk2010 / 03/06/2012 at 12:05pm / Canada (Ontario) / Work
Today, after a nice swim at the local pool, I ran into a naked girl in the showers. She screamed, kicked me in the nuts and ran off. I still have no clue what she was doing in the men's shower room. FML
by ouch / 02/29/2012 at 2:18pm / Italy (Emilia-Romagna) / Miscellaneous
by none / 02/28/2012 at 1:55pm / United States (Illinois) / Intimacy
by JeffeeBojangles / 02/28/2012 at 7:46am / United States (Texas) / Animals
Today, I was feeling frisky for the first time in months, so I started feeling up my husband. He kept insisting he had a headache and that he wasn't feeling it tonight. When I noticed his sarcasm, he said "Yeah, doesn't feel so great, does it?" and turned the TV volume up. FML
by Anonymous / 02/24/2012 at 10:07pm / United States (New York) / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 02/24/2012 at 10:05am / Ireland / Health
Today, my granddad had to start sleeping in my bedroom. He has flashback dreams to when he was a boxer, and he's already lamped my granny three times in his sleep. I get a camp-bed, and the chance to listen to him snore like a wild boar. FML
by Lovernotafighter / 02/24/2012 at 6:36am / United Kingdom / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 02/24/2012 at 3:40am / United States (New York) / Health
by Anonymous / 02/22/2012 at 11:47am / United States / Animals
by Anonymous / 02/21/2012 at 2:17pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Intimacy
by TheHezzer / 02/21/2012 at 2:17pm / United Kingdom (Bristol) / Miscellaneous
Today, I took my grandmother for a spin in my new car. Apparently, she had no idea that seat-warmers exist and that hers was turned on, because fifteen minutes into the ride she started shouting, "My ass is on fire!" causing me to swerve into a pole. FML
by BOOP / 02/17/2012 at 8:25am / United States (Montana) / Transportation
by JukeboxValkyrie / 02/16/2012 at 2:52am / United States (Florida) / Animals
- 1Today, my neighbor's 4-year-old daughter came up to me and asked if she could have my dog. When I… 2Today, after working for Uber for a few weeks I realized that my driver rating was dropping. After… 3Today, I moved three hours away from my boyfriend for college. Even though he got accepted to the…
- Today, after recently moving to Australia, I saw my first kangaroo. In the refrigerated section of… Today, I’m in China, and I took my Golden Retriever to the groomer’s to get him cleaned up, because… Today, my boyfriend whispered to me, “I’m so tired of these fucking mosquitos.” When I asked why he…