About mikeymayhem_87 : In case you're wondering... I am a heavy metal zombie!!
Hard at Work
Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.
Why am I up so early?
You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.
I moderated this!
In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!
Today, I was fired from my job. My boss claimed it was because I smelled like alcohol, never mind the fact that my job was brew master at a beer company. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24499) - you deserved it (1302)
On 03/06/2012 at 12:05pm - work - by sdk2010 (man) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, after a nice swim at the local pool, I ran into a naked girl in the showers. She screamed, kicked me in the nuts and ran off. I still have no clue what she was doing in the men's shower room. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28513) - you deserved it (1721)
On 02/29/2012 at 2:18pm - misc - by ouch (man) - Italy (Emilia-Romagna)
Today, I realized you should always knock on your parents' door before entering. Even at 6:30 am. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11071) - you deserved it (20103)
On 02/28/2012 at 1:55pm - intimacy - by none - United States (Illinois)
Today, my grandma seemingly decided that it was a really nice day to put my cat in the dryer. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21657) - you deserved it (1514)
On 02/28/2012 at 7:46am - animals - by JeffeeBojangles - United States (Texas)
Today, I was feeling frisky for the first time in months, so I started feeling up my husband. He kept insisting he had a headache and that he wasn't feeling it tonight. When I noticed his sarcasm, he said "Yeah, doesn't feel so great, does it?" and turned the TV volume up. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7287) - you deserved it (38898)
On 02/24/2012 at 10:07pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, I had to use antiperspirant deodorant under my breasts. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19476) - you deserved it (4601)
On 02/24/2012 at 10:05am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - Ireland
Today, my granddad had to start sleeping in my bedroom. He has flashback dreams to when he was a boxer, and he's already lamped my granny three times in his sleep. I get a camp-bed, and the chance to listen to him snore like a wild boar. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12769) - you deserved it (1201)
On 02/24/2012 at 6:36am - misc - by Lovernotafighter (man) - United Kingdom
Today, I gave myself a hernia while farting. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17041) - you deserved it (4922)
On 02/24/2012 at 3:40am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, I found out why you shouldn't drop instant mashed potatoes in a fish tank, especially when you have expensive fish. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5154) - you deserved it (32966)
On 02/22/2012 at 11:47am - animals - by Anonymous - United States
Today, my girlfriend said I could only take her virginity while I have a flaccid penis, so I won't hurt her. I get hard from just staring at her covered ass. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29695) - you deserved it (4053)
On 02/21/2012 at 2:17pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - Canada (British Columbia)
Today, I discovered the hard way that all the scare stories I'd heard about rats getting into pipes and finding their way into your toilet are, in fact, true. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19016) - you deserved it (1359)
On 02/21/2012 at 2:17pm - misc - by TheHezzer - United Kingdom (Bristol)
Today, I took my grandmother for a spin in my new car. Apparently, she had no idea that seat-warmers exist and that hers was turned on, because fifteen minutes into the ride she started shouting, "My ass is on fire!" causing me to swerve into a pole. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19264) - you deserved it (5041)
On 02/17/2012 at 8:25am - misc - by BOOP - United States (Montana)
Today, I discovered how startling it is to wake up by having your cat springboard off your face. The intended prey? Two fornicating geckos on the ceiling. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14776) - you deserved it (1483)
On 02/16/2012 at 2:52am - animals - by JukeboxValkyrie (woman) - United States (Florida)
Today, after applying for a job at the local pet store, I picked up a ferret. It began licking my cheek, causing me to turn my head. It then latched onto my ear and hung like a giant furry hoop earring. I screamed, then quietly left the building. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15674) - you deserved it (3595)
On 02/16/2012 at 2:43am - animals - by parkertownparadise (man) - United States (North Carolina)
Today, I visited the doctor. I had food poisoning last week, which led to diarrhea. The diarrhea was so bad it caused a hemorrhoid. The hemorrhoid somehow became infected. One bad sandwich, and now I have an infected asshole. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26490) - you deserved it (1602)
On 02/13/2012 at 7:03am - health - by loveinanelevator (man) -
Wednesday 15 May 2013
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