mikepzz

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Offline (the 06/20/2016 at 4:21am)

mikepzz

8Fucked!

mikepzzmikepzz
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Sunday 22 November 1992 (23 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 2096
  • Number of comments : 247
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

About mikepzz : I'm a Heavy equipment mechanic, race car driving, bad ass motherfucker :D

mikepzz's page activity

Visits<b>missmorggan</b> - the 06/14/2016 at 12:45pm<b>Darkarron</b> - the 04/14/2016 at 8:42pm<b>ZiaBerry</b> - the 03/21/2016 at 5:19pm<b>jurgen15948501</b> - the 03/07/2016 at 11:37pm<b>Alex5074</b> - the 02/24/2016 at 4:34pm<b>notabanana</b> - the 02/21/2016 at 8:33am<b>scaredpollo</b> - the 02/02/2016 at 8:52pm<b>sweetgurl1985</b> - the 01/18/2016 at 8:06am<b>oldmanringo</b> - the 01/18/2016 at 4:49am<b>GAeroNKissR</b> - the 01/11/2016 at 12:52am<b>Ashd09</b> - the 12/17/2015 at 6:10pm<b>RawrPancaked</b> - the 11/02/2015 at 9:57am<b>personthing</b> - the 10/05/2015 at 3:18am<b>sarika</b> - the 09/10/2015 at 1:56pm<b>One_Way</b> - the 08/08/2015 at 12:17pm<b>tylercoffman420</b> - the 07/20/2015 at 12:41am<b>Michael_Alex</b> - the 07/16/2015 at 1:29am<b>ireply_wlyrics</b> - the 06/08/2015 at 12:19pm

Fucked!<b>notabanana</b> - the 02/21/2016 at 2:33pm<b>GAeroNKissR</b> - the 11/01/2015 at 6:23am<b>missmorggan</b> - the 07/25/2015 at 3:47am<b>snarkytruth</b> - the 04/04/2015 at 8:02pm<b>DamnBailie</b> - the 04/01/2015 at 9:56pm<b>sweetgurl1985</b> - the 03/01/2015 at 8:12am<b>jimmayiscool</b> - the 02/18/2015 at 3:32am<b>RobotUnicorn1209</b> - the 10/30/2014 at 2:36am

mikepzz's FML badges

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

See all of mikepzz's badges

mikepzz's favorite FMLs

Today, while leaving McDonald's, I threw a fry out the window to a flock of seagulls. I watched in the rear-view mirror as it landed in the opposite lane and about 60 winged rats descended upon the street, causing a truck to veer off the road and crash. FML

by John / 07/09/2013 at 10:48pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, it's been weeks since some asshat started placing gnomes in my front and back yards. I resorted to setting up cameras, which I thought had deterred the idiot, until I walked into my kitchen this morning and found two gnomes on the counter. Nothing on the tapes. I'm freaking out here. FML

by ilivealoneandwhatthefuck / 06/23/2013 at 1:02pm / Guam / Miscellaneous

Today, being near-broke, I resorted to shopping at Walmart. Barely ten minutes in, an obese sack of lard posing as a human being shoved me away from the bacon I was looking at. I fell, busted my lip, then got screamed at by another woman for not watching where I was going. FML

by Anonymous / 06/22/2013 at 4:55pm / United States / Health

Today, I walked in on my grandma playing with herself. Every time I close my eyes, I see things that no mortal was ever meant to see. FML

by bleeeaaaaaacccccchhhhhhhh / 06/21/2013 at 5:00pm / United States (District of Columbia) / Intimacy

Today, I found out I'm going to be a grandfather. I'm 29, my son is 13 and the girl in question is 16. FML

by young grandpa / 06/17/2013 at 6:49pm / United States (Georgia) / Kids

Today, my grandma's new dildo arrived in the mail. We buried her yesterday. FML

by hinting / 06/17/2013 at 12:43pm / United States (Michigan) / Intimacy

Today, I got to drive my mom's car. I'd recently watched the new Fast and Furious movie, I thought it'd be fun to drift around a few corners. I ended up smashing straight into someone's front yard. FML

by Anonymous / 06/07/2013 at 6:00pm / United States / Transportation

Today, at work, I was trying to get the octopus out of its tank to transfer it to another one. It instantly latched to my face and sprayed ink all over me. My boss told me to stop playing with the animals. FML

by FenRackety / 05/10/2013 at 8:37am / Canada / Animals

Today, working at a fast food restaurant, I was cleaning dishes in the back. I started to sing to myself. During the chorus I heard the echo of my voice in my ear. My boss had pushed the talk button on my headset so every staff member and everyone in the lobby could hear me over the intercom. FML

by legit247 / 05/10/2013 at 12:44am / United States (Missouri) / Work

Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend, and I told him I was close to having an orgasm. He smirked and started talking like Yoda, saying, "Strong with the cum, this one is". Orgasm gone. FML

by iwassoclose / 04/10/2013 at 12:32pm / United States / Intimacy

Today, I refused to go down on my boyfriend of 9 months. He then shoved me off the couch and, half crying, yelled that I was the third girl this week to turn him down. After sobbing for a bit, he looked me in the eyes and said, "I need you to do this so I can prove my manhood." FML

by saywhat / 04/09/2013 at 7:05am / United States (Washington) / Intimacy

Today, I found an invisible ink pen. I drew on my arms, thinking nobody would see it. I had an allergic reaction to the ink, and I now have three very large, very visible, red penises on my forearm. FML

by maturity / 04/07/2013 at 8:30pm / Australia (New South Wales) / Health

Today, I seemingly decided not to remove my foot from the pedal-clip of my bicycle until I had properly introduced myself to the cement. FML

by Anonymous / 04/03/2013 at 8:06am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Miscellaneous

Today, I awoke to my husband talking to someone on the phone at 2am. I heard him say, "Baby you're making me hard." Immediately, I asked him who he was talking to. His response? "It's Jake, from State Farm." FML

by anonymous / 03/27/2013 at 7:55pm / United States (Hawaii) / Intimacy

Today, I got so drunk that I tasered myself in the balls as a joke, fell down my friend's porch stairs and rolled out into the street. FML

by anon / 03/25/2013 at 2:31pm / United States / Health