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mikemocapaldi

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mikemocapaldi
  • Town/Country : london, canada
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 17 May 1995 (18 years)
  • Number of visits : 662
  • Number of comments : 3
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About mikemocapaldi : ye well i thought id make an account cause i come here A LOT i love seeing fmls xD

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Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

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mikemocapaldi's favorite FMLs

Today, I attended a funeral. During the minute of silence, my phone went off. My ringtone is "It's good to be alive". FML

#15616538
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16403) - you deserved it (41613)

On 04/03/2011 at 3:02am - misc - by JJMan217 (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I learned that when I leave skid marks in the toilet my wife uses my toothbrush to remove them. FML

#15598918
275 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30010) - you deserved it (41482)

On 04/02/2011 at 1:03am - misc - by Toothy (man) - United States (California)

Today, I heard the four most dreaded words known to man during my first time: "Is it in yet?" It was. FML

#15546300
420 comments

I agree, your life sucks (66912) - you deserved it (9318)

On 03/29/2011 at 1:26pm - intimacy - by Johntheladdo (man) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I found out why my parents forgot my birthday. Facebook didn't remind them. FML

#15414208
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35668) - you deserved it (4075)

On 03/21/2011 at 11:03am - misc - by Unlovedchild -

Today, in an attempt to impress a girl I like, I tried to crush a soda can by hitting it with my forehead. Not only did I fail, I knocked myself out in the process. When I regained consciousness, the girl was gone and someone had taken the liberty of drawing a penis on my face. FML

#15296176
263 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10504) - you deserved it (53728)

On 03/13/2011 at 6:26pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Missouri)

Today, I was trying to help a very slow-witted client over the phone. After a while, I realised he was just delaying while pleasuring himself to the sound of my voice. FML

#14775233
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30894) - you deserved it (3438)

On 01/30/2011 at 2:25pm - intimacy - by Milly (woman) - United Kingdom (Lancashire)

Today, my brother and father thought it would be a good idea to wake me up by turning on a chainsaw and wearing hockey masks. FML

#14753442
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29661) - you deserved it (3868)

On 01/29/2011 at 2:29am - misc - by unlucky dudebag - United States (California)

Today, I signed my own plaster-cast to make people believe that I actually have friends. FML

#14608704
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23588) - you deserved it (6621) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/17/2011 at 1:24am - health - by SkinsCastSelection - France - Chosen by the cast of Skins

Today, I was naked on top of my boyfriend looking lovingly into his eyes. He then started to use my boobs as punching bags while singing "Eye of the Tiger". FML

#14305984
212 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38589) - you deserved it (8374)

On 12/23/2010 at 1:36am - intimacy - by nemo518 (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was playing hide and seek with a few friends. I hid in the bathroom, under the sink in a cabinet. I ended up having to sit there quiet as a mouse while my grandfather took an incredibly long and vile dump. I was too afraid to move. Let's just say he didn't rush it. FML

#14272041
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29152) - you deserved it (8243)

On 12/20/2010 at 12:09pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my boyfriend was going down on me. When I orgasmed, my leg flew out and I accidentally kicked him in the balls. For the next ten minutes, he lay in the fetal position. FML

#14161331
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25160) - you deserved it (18578)

On 12/11/2010 at 1:00am - intimacy - by caligirl921 - United States

Today, I was texting my trainer to rearrange our training session. My girlfriend texted me during the exchange, asking what I wanted for Christmas. I accidentally texted my trainer, "All I want are your sweet titties in my face". I'm awaiting a response. FML

#14000546
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13671) - you deserved it (37408)

On 11/27/2010 at 3:36pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, in my college class, our teacher asked us what we wanted to do when we get out of college. I guess being a U.S. Marine gets you a lecture for the whole class to hear that I'm a war hungry pig, and should get a real job that requires a brain. My job field is Aircraft repair. FML

#13506521
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26849) - you deserved it (3538)

On 10/19/2010 at 12:21am - misc - by S3R1AL K1LL3R X - United States

Today, I was robbed of five bucks by a vending machine that said "Enjoy Life!" FML

#13220613
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21192) - you deserved it (3115)

On 09/27/2010 at 9:09am - misc - by lovelife - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex for the first time when my 4 year old sister walked in. She thought we were making a dog pile, so just as soon as my boyfriend was about to finish, she jumped on his back. FML

#12948197
176 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22093) - you deserved it (20102)

On 09/07/2010 at 12:06pm - intimacy - by Ashley - United States (California)



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