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  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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mikalb

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mikalb
  • Town/Country : Not specified
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  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 696
  • Number of comments : 13
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

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mikalb's favorite FMLs

Today, my dad had his "sixteen years overdue" vasectomy. I'm fifteen. FML

#18367915 (131)

I agree, your life sucks (19380) - you deserved it (1599)

On 11/27/2011 at 4:41pm - misc - by davidh5012 (man) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend when he suddenly pulls out and says, "Pull my penis." So I pulled his penis and he farted. Then he started doing it again. FML

#18260975 (226)

I agree, your life sucks (25700) - you deserved it (4618)

On 11/16/2011 at 12:27am - intimacy - by halloweed (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my son asked me where babies come from. I told him, "From god." He came back with, "Daddy said it was from fucking." FML

#18255063 (199)

I agree, your life sucks (10491) - you deserved it (6022)

On 11/15/2011 at 12:20pm - intimacy - by lababy - United States

Today, a neighbor came by while I was cooking. She asked for some of my cheese, so I gave her a big slice and told her I only had cheddar. She angrily refused to accept the slice, and made her way to my fridge. She then yelled at me for not having an assortment of cheeses. FML

#18253335 (198)

I agree, your life sucks (10682) - you deserved it (937)

On 11/15/2011 at 3:40am - misc - by SetoAyumi - United States (California)

Today, the girl my boyfriend cheated on me with posted pics of them kissing on Facebook, and tagged me in them. FML

#17934010 (318)

I agree, your life sucks (46949) - you deserved it (2541)

On 10/08/2011 at 9:04am - love - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, I got kicked in the crotch. It popped my cherry. I lost my virginity to a shoe. FML

#17779717 (559)

I agree, your life sucks (44128) - you deserved it (3786)

On 09/19/2011 at 10:39am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me by covering my car with post-it notes that read "it's you not me." FML

#17673580 (127)

I agree, your life sucks (18788) - you deserved it (2405)

On 09/05/2011 at 7:14pm - love - by rplovez (woman) - Canada

Today, I asked my boyfriend why he didn't believe in marriage. His response was, "I believe in marriage. Just not marriage with you." FML

#17670643 (176)

I agree, your life sucks (28196) - you deserved it (3779)

On 09/05/2011 at 1:05pm - love - by jellyybean - United States (Kentucky)

Today, I found my husband Googling the Morse Code. He thinks his farts are trying to communicate with him. FML

#17611865 (184)

I agree, your life sucks (23352) - you deserved it (2408)

On 08/29/2011 at 11:38am - health - by KJL - United States

Today, my boyfriend came in to kiss me. Being sweaty and nasty, I said "Not now, I'm hot and sweaty." He looked at me blankly and said "So am I, just smell my ball sweat." FML

#17611743 (100)

I agree, your life sucks (7445) - you deserved it (1875)

On 08/29/2011 at 11:06am - intimacy - by hopeless-.- (woman) - United States

Today, while riding the bus, a creepy guy gave me the "rape glare" and another guy repeated every word to the conversation I was having with my friend under his breath. FML

#17597780 (145)

I agree, your life sucks (20014) - you deserved it (1710)

On 08/27/2011 at 7:06pm - misc - by Revalation - United States

Today, my boyfriend found out that if guys eat fruit often, their sperm will taste better. He bought a can of fruit for himself to eat, and said that he bought it just for me. This is the most romantic thing he's ever done. FML

#17446772 (221)

I agree, your life sucks (11181) - you deserved it (1854)

On 08/12/2011 at 1:33am - intimacy - by Pissedoff777 - United States (Arizona)

Today, my dad shaved his head. This wouldn't be so bad if he didn't expect me to address him as "Captain Picard" 24/7 now. He won't answer me otherwise. FML

#17406072 (153)

I agree, your life sucks (17068) - you deserved it (2504)

On 08/08/2011 at 10:12am - misc - by MissArizona (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I discovered the reason my favorite stick of deodorant hasn't smelled right for the past two weeks. My dad uses it on his butt crack and balls "to clean up the stank". FML

#17404409 (299)

I agree, your life sucks (42994) - you deserved it (2380)

On 08/08/2011 at 3:16am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, the guy I've had the biggest crush on came to my house to pick me up for our first date. As we were leaving, my father screams out "Do you still have diarrhea?" I don't have diarrhea. My dad thinks he's so funny. FML

#17364293 (144)

I agree, your life sucks (30353) - you deserved it (2484)

On 08/04/2011 at 4:30am - love - by Anon (woman) - United States (Nevada)



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