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  • Number of visits : 589
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  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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miicifer's page activity

Visits<b>Chinman12</b> - the 10/23/2015 at 4:48am<b>Matheo</b> - the 12/02/2014 at 4:59pm<b>CaptainSmith28</b> - the 07/19/2014 at 6:32pm<b>zzzaman</b> - the 06/16/2014 at 8:19pm

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miicifer's favorite FMLs

Today, I got several angry messages on Facebook, demanding to know how I could cheat on my wife. They didn't believe me when I said I had no idea what they meant. Turns out my wife made a sarcastic post about my "new mistress". She was talking about Fallout 4. FML

Today, I heard a noise outside in the middle of the night, so I went out for a look. I'm also pregnant and can't stop farting. I get 2 steps outside and accidentally let a huge one rip, then, from the shadows I hear "Oh my god!" and then running in the opposite direction. I farted away a prowler. FML


I agree, your life sucks (28857) - you deserved it (2939)

On 09/21/2015 at 10:45am - misc - by Gassy - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I was walking to my car with 600 dollars worth of books because I start college next week, when I was robbed by some guy that sounded like Cartman. He punched me because I could not stop laughing whenever he would try to threaten me. FML

Today, I was using the toilet. I was still insanely pissed off over an argument with my girlfriend, which kind of explains why I was wiping my ass so furiously that my fingers broke through the tissue and ended up in my ass, causing me to shriek like a little girl. FML


I agree, your life sucks (21207) - you deserved it (13104)

On 06/19/2015 at 9:22pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, for my birthday, my boyfriend made me a coupon book. I thought it was sweet until I noticed they were all conditional. For example; "Give your boyfriend a blowjob and he'll give you a 10 minute back massage!". They're all like that and he's mad because I refuse to use them. FML


I agree, your life sucks (31509) - you deserved it (3548)

On 05/28/2015 at 11:39pm - intimacy - by shmoooopie (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I started getting really bad chest pains at work. I googled it and the internet convinced me I was having a heart attack. Scared for my life, I started to dial for an ambulance when I let out the biggest fart you could ever imagine. Turns out it was trapped gas. FML


I agree, your life sucks (27346) - you deserved it (10082)

On 04/21/2015 at 3:55am - health - by Not dying. (woman) - United Kingdom (Hertford)

Today, I was at a big meeting at work. The CEO was reaming the hell out of us for our recent poor profits, when I accidentally let rip a vile fart. I was then subjected to a 10 minute tirade of abuse for "trying to be a funny man", and told that whatever small chance I had for a promotion is now gone. FML


I agree, your life sucks (25634) - you deserved it (5741)

On 03/27/2015 at 5:19pm - work - by screwedupfuck (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today my girlfriend of a month told me that the only thing keeping her from swallowing a bottle of pills is being in a relationship with me, because she doesn't handle breakups well. FML

Today, I am still finding glitter in my ass crack after a concert last night that had a confetti cannon. Thanks Marilyn Manson, I feel so metal now. FML

Today, I came home from work to find that my girlfriend had sold all of my N64 and Atari games and both the consoles and bought me a PS4 with the money. While I was standing there in shock, she kissed me on the cheek and said, "I know, I'm the greatest." FML


I agree, your life sucks (46638) - you deserved it (4378)

On 02/22/2015 at 3:41pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, as I walked into the bank, I tripped and bumped into a security guard. He thought I was assaulting him, so he pinned me to the floor and called for backup as he held me at gunpoint. FML


I agree, your life sucks (34899) - you deserved it (2960)

On 11/25/2014 at 3:15pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I was sitting on a bench at the local park, eating a banana. A guy old enough to be my grandfather walked by, turned to look at me, then said "Young man, I wish I were that banana." He walked away, and I almost blacked out choking on it in shock. FML


I agree, your life sucks (38361) - you deserved it (4012)

On 09/26/2014 at 4:40pm - misc - by Operation Yewtree here I come (man) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, I had to take my husband's laptop to University for an in-class exam. I opened the screen, and loud porn started to auto-play. The silence in the class was deafening as I tried to make it stop. FML


I agree, your life sucks (50920) - you deserved it (7092)

On 09/12/2014 at 9:17am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)

Today, I had some painful gas at work, so I tried to silently ease it out. It was silent all right; silent, and so deadly that someone exclaimed, "What the fuck?!" My coworkers traced it back to me. Now they're all pointing their mini desk fans in my direction to make a point. FML


I agree, your life sucks (40043) - you deserved it (11157)

On 08/19/2014 at 5:54pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, while at work as a telemarketer, I called a customer on his home phone. Once I was connected, an automated voice said, "To speak with a customer, please press 1." Confused, I pressed one. I then heard loud laughter followed by, "Oh my god! What a dumbass!" before they hung up. FML


I agree, your life sucks (40142) - you deserved it (21495)

On 05/07/2014 at 11:57pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)

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Tuesday 24 November 2015

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