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mich23's favorite FMLs
Today, I got mugged. But luckily I had on my keyring the pepper spray that my husband had insisted I keep with me. Unlucky for me, my husband's co-worker, who borrowed my keys, emptied my pepper by spraying it on a brick wall one day when he was bored. FML
by Username / 02/08/2011 at 10:27pm / Miscellaneous
by nomoreart / 02/08/2011 at 7:30pm / United States (Virginia) / Miscellaneous
Today, I went to get an ultrasound of my reproductive system done because I was having some abdominal pain. Everything was fine until the tech suddenly gasped and said, "Oh my God! You have two uteruses! Want me to print off a picture so you can show them off to your friends?" FML
by Anonymous / 02/08/2011 at 6:29pm / United States (South Carolina) / Health
Today, I got a call from my daughter’s teacher asking me to come pick her up. My daughter wouldn’t tell her what was wrong. I left an important work meeting. When I got there she stated her boyfriend broke up with her and she couldn't emotionally make it through the rest of the day. She's 5. FML
by mom21 / 02/08/2011 at 12:46pm / United States (Wisconsin) / Kids
by Username / 02/08/2011 at 11:57am / United States (Nevada) / Love
by Anonymous / 02/08/2011 at 11:27am / United States (Missouri) / Work
Today, I was leaving school to get tested for peptic ulcers, because my stomach has been hurting for a few months. To wish me luck, one of my friends gave me a friendly punch in the stomach. I threw up blood. FML
by CatLitterLover / 02/08/2011 at 1:51am / United States (California) / Health
Today, I found out the real reason why me and my boyfriend of four and a half months have "so much in common". He used to be my stalker, who followed me around in a black hoodie and always posted stuff on my Myspace as an anonymous person. FML
Today, scarcely having time to look at myself, I quickly got dressed and went to work. Only when I got there and saw my reflection in the bathroom mirror did I notice that the colour and detail of my black lacy bra could easily be seen. I work for a construction company. Full of men. FML
by Anonymous / 02/07/2011 at 2:57pm / Australia (New South Wales) / Work
by hushnow / 02/07/2011 at 1:04pm / United States / Work
by Raprotcommander / 02/07/2011 at 10:47am / United States (Georgia) / Health
by bob / 02/07/2011 at 1:52am / Canada (Alberta) / Money
Today, I went to go use an automatic cart in Walmart because I broke my hip in January. They were all being used by morbidly obese people throughout the store. I asked a manager if she could get me one, but apparently their weight issues are more impeding than my broken hip. FML
by LimpMcgee / 02/06/2011 at 9:36pm / United States (Maryland) / Health
by bymyself / 02/06/2011 at 9:05pm / Miscellaneous
- 1Today, my parents let me babysit my baby sister for the first time. About an hour after they left,… 2Today, I saw an elderly lady fall over in the street. Nobody bothered to do anything, so I went… 3Today, I was fired for being late to work, even though the only reason I was late was because I had…