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You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
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mich23's favorite FMLs
by Anonymous / 02/14/2011 at 12:31am / United States (North Carolina) / Health
Today, a man pulled me violently into an alleyway and informed me I was being mugged. Being a body-builder, I said, "Oh yeah? I dare you." He kicked my ass in a matter of seconds, stole my wallet, then farted on my bruised face. He called me a wimp. FML
by NotAsToughAsHeThinks / 02/13/2011 at 10:25pm / United States (Montana) / Health
Today, on the bus, water kept dripping on my head so I stood up to move. As I got up, the bus turned round a corner and I fell over into a man's lap. When I tried to get up, I slipped down between his legs. FML
by alice / 02/13/2011 at 8:18pm / United Kingdom / Transportation
by jobless / 02/13/2011 at 12:31am / United States (North Dakota) / Work
by FlatTire / 02/13/2011 at 12:30am / United States (Colorado) / Transportation
by cs / 02/12/2011 at 9:21pm / United States (Wisconsin) / Miscellaneous
Today, I cleaned up my dog's crap after my wife asked me. 5 minutes later she yelled at me for being lazy as she slammed the door leaving for work. My dog shit in the exact same spot apparently to make me look stupid. FML
by Username / 02/12/2011 at 9:17pm / United States (Kentucky) / Animals
Today, I took sexy pictures for my boyfriend. I am at my Aunt's house. I uploaded the pictures and after successfully posting them in a message I deleted them. I accidentally deleted the whole photo library. Now she is taking the computer to Apple tomorrow to recover the "lost" photos. FML
by Hailey / 02/12/2011 at 8:36pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 02/12/2011 at 1:40pm / United States (California) / Health
by Anonymous / 02/12/2011 at 11:52am / United States (California) / Love
Today, a police officer gave me a ticket for smoking. He told me that my parents would have to be contacted to come pick me up. My drunk dad came to the rescue, and almost hit the police car. Way to go dad. FML
by savanna(: / 02/12/2011 at 3:05am / United States (Utah) / Miscellaneous
Today, I woke up in the middle of the night to get a glass of water. Groggy and disoriented, I bumped into several pieces of furniture and made a lot of noise. My dad woke up, mistook me for a burglar, and knocked me out with his fist. FML
by anonymous / 02/12/2011 at 12:48am / Canada (British Columbia) / Miscellaneous
Today, I found out that my boyfriend cheated on me with my best friend. I texted her and I would never talk to her again. But I accidentally sent it to my other best friend, who responded, "I'm so sorry, I never meant for you to find out". My two best friends cheated with my boyfriend. FML
by Anonymous / 02/12/2011 at 12:19am / United States (Texas) / Love
by allgrowedup / 02/11/2011 at 10:10pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous
Today, I realized that as a result of working in an office which has an oddly-placed window, the direct sunlight has caused the left side of my face to become significantly darker than the right. Just call me Harvey Dent. FML
by Anonymous / 02/11/2011 at 1:15pm / United States (California) / Work
- 1Today, my boyfriend presented me with a 30-minute montage video of him working out and flexing his… 2Today, my boyfriend finally told me that he loved me. This would've been fantastic if he didn't say… 3Today, I was fired from my job because I, in my bosses words, "Abided by company policy to such an…