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mhterp90

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mhterp90

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 18 July 1990 (25 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 1309
  • Number of comments : 18
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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mhterp90's page activity

Visits<b>feeloona</b> - the 10/20/2015 at 7:21am<b>im_a_squid</b> - the 08/20/2015 at 6:55pm<b>Big_Bear99</b> - the 07/27/2015 at 12:46am<b>hfudge</b> - the 04/28/2015 at 7:29pm<b>random_funnygirl</b> - the 04/23/2015 at 9:58am<b>MaybeMoo</b> - the 04/14/2015 at 5:37pm<b>MistyKittyx</b> - the 04/04/2015 at 12:31pm<b>Chrissyella</b> - the 04/03/2015 at 4:26pm<b>Queenf</b> - the 03/06/2015 at 6:45am<b>Vball6</b> - the 12/14/2014 at 9:50am<b>shadow_heart_13</b> - the 11/06/2014 at 10:00am<b>Mr_snuggels</b> - the 09/16/2014 at 9:39am<b>TrackGirl19</b> - the 09/15/2014 at 7:58pm<b>superwolf33</b> - the 07/18/2014 at 1:27am<b>Mmkay1515</b> - the 06/16/2014 at 11:32am<b>AlliTheKat</b> - the 05/23/2014 at 4:28pm<b>lirideout</b> - the 05/19/2014 at 4:45pm<b>Rainhawk94</b> - the 05/02/2014 at 10:24pm

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You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

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You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

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You have left your thumbprint on 2500 comments.

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mhterp90's favorite FMLs

Today, my 17-year-old son managed to easily convince my 13-year-old daughter that if you have sex before getting married, you'll instantly get horrible diseases that will kill you. Her freaking out is how I found out she's not only gullible as hell, but sexually active as well. FML

#21283066
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45220) - you deserved it (5770)

On 10/22/2014 at 12:09pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Norway (Rogaland)

Today, my mom got genuinely angry at me because I refused to let her pop a zit that I had "promised" she could pop a few days back. She said with utmost look of disappointment that I'm "not a man of my word". FML

#21267417
78 comments

Today, my girlfriend got up in the middle of sex saying, "You're taking too long, I'm gonna go make some popcorn." I asked her if she could get me some. She said no. FML

#21251846
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47866) - you deserved it (10345)

On 09/04/2014 at 3:32pm - intimacy - by candy man - United States (North Carolina)

Today, while my teacher was demonstrating how to use the ultrasound equipment, we all figured out that I'm pregnant. FML

#21245451
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55139) - you deserved it (11234)

On 08/25/2014 at 10:37pm - health - by whotouchedyou1 - United States (Texas)

Today, my girlfriend took our prank war way too far and had a package sent to me at home. Confused, I opened it. It contained a dildo and a bottle of lube. I didn't know my dad was watching over my shoulder until I heard him choke on his coffee and felt it splash over my neck. FML

#21241836
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53191) - you deserved it (9553)

On 08/20/2014 at 5:03pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my husband was disgusted by me expressing breast milk while we were in the shower together. This is the same man who thinks it's funny to pee on my legs because, "It'll wash off." FML

#21229021
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46324) - you deserved it (4845)

On 08/04/2014 at 1:42am - health - by Ew?Really? (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I had to explain what "cashback" was to a customer. She called me a liar and wanted to talk to a manager because she felt I made up the concept. I'm the manager. She wouldn't believe me and waited in the store for an hour. Apparently this is what a Masters degree gets me. FML

#21194527
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49731) - you deserved it (4381)

On 07/01/2014 at 12:26am - work - by where do they come from - United States (Washington)

Today, my doctor got my blood test results from the lab. He looked at me gravely and told me I had just weeks left to live. After I started hyperventilating and crying, he burst out laughing and said he was kidding. He then prescribed me some iron tablets and sent me on my way. FML

#21182241
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55046) - you deserved it (6341)

On 06/20/2014 at 7:03pm - health - by legitfile.bat.virus.exe (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my cat decided to hide in the garbage can so he could get a free trip outside, but was too fat to climb all of the way inside of it. He got stuck half-way in. It took me ten minutes to get him out. FML

Today, one of my most problematic students remained after class, whence he strongly insinuated his interest in receiving oral sex; I tried to convey just how inappropriate that was, when he interrupted, "Look, will you at least touch it?" FML

#21114779
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (62729) - you deserved it (6517)

On 04/16/2014 at 6:03pm - intimacy - by MILF (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, I had to convince my 3-year-old son that there were monsters in the house just so he would lie in bed and cuddle me. FML

#21112742
190 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36879) - you deserved it (27060)

On 04/14/2014 at 12:57pm - kids - by tinytiny1124 (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I realized that my boyfriend is so obsessed with tickling me that my body has developed a conditioned response. Now I flinch every time he touches me, no matter what we're doing. FML

#21111720
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43951) - you deserved it (4291)

On 04/13/2014 at 5:33am - love - by Ticklish - United States (Iowa)

Today, I thought it would be funny to smack my daughter's head gently with a balloon. It hit her hair clip and exploded. She won't stop crying, and my wife will be home any minute. I'm screwed. FML

#21100295
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44805) - you deserved it (19295)

On 03/30/2014 at 4:36pm - kids - by and not even in the good way (man) - United States

Today, I was at Walmart and had to use the bathroom. I sat down and farted real loud. I didn't realize someone was in there with me until I heard a voice say, "Dude, that was a good one." It was a man's voice. I then realized I was in the men's restroom. FML

#21095689
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50392) - you deserved it (12966)

On 03/24/2014 at 11:39pm - misc - by dani (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, my boyfriend finally succeeded in unhooking my bra with one hand, excitedly exclaiming, "Boobies be free!" FML

#21043704
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46053) - you deserved it (11888)

On 01/29/2014 at 12:13am - love - by freed - United States (Ohio)



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