mhterp90

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mhterp90

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 18 July 1990 (25 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 1559
  • Number of comments : 18
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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mhterp90's page activity

Visits<b>kitteh90</b> - the 02/15/2016 at 7:43am<b>feeloona</b> - the 10/20/2015 at 7:21am<b>im_a_squid</b> - the 08/20/2015 at 6:55pm<b>Big_Bear99</b> - the 07/27/2015 at 12:46am<b>hfudge</b> - the 04/28/2015 at 7:29pm<b>random_funnygirl</b> - the 04/23/2015 at 9:58am<b>MaybeMoo</b> - the 04/14/2015 at 5:37pm<b>MistyKittyx</b> - the 04/04/2015 at 12:31pm<b>Chrissyella</b> - the 04/03/2015 at 4:26pm<b>Queenf</b> - the 03/06/2015 at 6:45am<b>Vball6</b> - the 12/14/2014 at 9:50am<b>shadow_heart_13</b> - the 11/06/2014 at 10:00am<b>Mr_snuggels</b> - the 09/16/2014 at 9:39am<b>TrackGirl19</b> - the 09/15/2014 at 7:58pm<b>superwolf33</b> - the 07/18/2014 at 1:27am<b>Mmkay1515</b> - the 06/16/2014 at 11:32am<b>AlliTheKat</b> - the 05/23/2014 at 4:28pm<b>lirideout</b> - the 05/19/2014 at 4:45pm

mhterp90's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

The Thumb strikes back

You have left your thumbprint on 2500 comments.

See all of mhterp90's badges

mhterp90's favorite FMLs

Today, I had a dream where I was having the best sex of my life. With Donald Trump. My boyfriend hasn't stopped laughing. FML

by whatthefuck / 12/27/2015 at 6:22pm / United States (Utah) / Intimacy

Today, after weeks of keeping it a secret, I excitedly gave my boyfriend what I thought to be the perfect Christmas present. Turns out lock picking sets are illegal in Ohio. FML

by BahHumbug / 12/27/2015 at 12:18am / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous

Today, I finally stood up to the guy who's been bullying me for the last 2 years. Even though he's been caught in the act several times, he never gets punished, so I figured I'd get away with gut-punching him. Nope. An hour later, I was suspended from school. FML

by Anonymous / 10/30/2015 at 6:22pm / United States (Missouri) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was talking with some friends and the girl I like. During a lull in the conversation, she looked at me and said, "Ugh, I really wanna pop your zits." FML

by Anonymous / 10/14/2015 at 9:45am / United States (Arizona) / Love

Today, the guy I've been seeing bought me a nice bottle of wine and cooked dinner for me. Later, we started having sex for the first time. All was going well until he ran to the bathroom mid-sex and I had to listen to him with explosive diarrhea. The worst part is, he wanted to keep going after. FML

by westie732 / 09/09/2015 at 10:44pm / United States (Ohio) / Intimacy

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I told my boyfriend about how I'm self-conscious about my B-cup breasts. About 20 minutes later, he pointed to another girl with a small chest and said, "See, you're not the only one with small tits!" FML

by Anonymous / 09/08/2015 at 6:33pm / United States (Nevada) / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend was putting baby powder on my bare ass, when his dad walked into the room, casually set a laundry basket next to the bed, and walked out like nothing happened. FML

by ManderDander / 09/05/2015 at 2:48pm / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, I found dog poop in my room that had probably been there for days. My girlfriend, who was watching the house, said she didn't realize it was there, because she thought it was the smell of her own farts. FML

by Anonymous / 08/29/2015 at 8:06pm / Canada (Ontario) / Animals

Today, my brother said he was cleaning his room. When I walked in, he was giving my cousin a blowjob. FML

by Anonymous / 08/29/2015 at 7:01pm / United States (West Virginia) / Intimacy

Today, my girlfriend thought it'd be hilarious to secretly swap her and my mom's numbers in my phone, then sexually tease me before going to work. I found out about the prank when I texted my "girlfriend", saying I was going to fuck her so hard she wouldn't walk straight for days. FML

by Anonymous / 07/19/2015 at 12:36am / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, while trying to score a date, I almost made a girl pass out. No, I didn't try to chloroform this one. I just came across as so pathetic that she laughed hard enough to have an asthma attack. FML

by Anonymous / 07/18/2015 at 11:45pm / Australia (Australian Capital Territory) / Miscellaneous

Today, I lost my virginity. The most memorable aspect of it wasn't the fact that my boyfriend finished after two thrusts, but rather the fact that he first said, "The pilot has entered the cockpit." FML

by henhouse / 07/18/2015 at 7:09am / Australia (Victoria) / Intimacy

Today, I got fired, apparently for being racist to black people. When I told my boyfriend, he couldn't stop laughing. He's black. FML

by Razz / 07/15/2015 at 6:02pm / Australia (Victoria) / Miscellaneous

Today, I went downstairs early in the morning to watch a movie. As I walked into the living room and reached for the light switch, I heard my dad say "Knew you'd change your mind. Get them panties off." followed by the sound of a zipper being undone. I've never been so mortified in my life. FML

by Anonymous / 07/15/2015 at 12:29pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend called me while I was at work. He sounded very excited and told me he had a surprise for me. He doesn't usually do this kind of thing, so I was excited. When I came home, I found him naked, with "Bone Appetite" written right above his penis. FML

by stillhungry / 06/27/2015 at 2:37pm / United States (California) / Love