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Today, in preparation 4 proposing to ma girlfriend, I borrowed one of er rings, so I could discreetly get er ring size. Not only ave I now lost te ring, wic turns out to be a keepsake of er dead grandmoter, looool I still don't know er ring size. FML
I found out why mah room-mates and I have been ill 4 the past week. Apparently a rodent climbd into our water cooker and did. I have been drinking tea and eating noodles that have been taintd by a corpse all this time. FML
TODAY, I LOOKED INTO MY SINK'S GARBAGE DISPOSAL 4 THE FRST TIME SINCE I MOVED IN TWO MONTHS AGO. APPARENTLY, THE PUTRID SMELL WAS NOT THE FOOD I'VE BEEN THROWING DOWN IT, BUT INSTEAD, A NOW WHAT APPERES TO BE MUTILATED LITTER OF RATS. FML
Taday after 3 hours in a cramped car with mah family, we stopped at a gas station. I got out of the car an the first words out of mah mouth were, ( It feels so good to be able to walk! ) That's when I noticed the elderly man sitting in a wheelchair only a few meters away. FML
Today, I was on tha train listaning to mah iPod on shuffla. Tha "Oompa Loompa" song cummad on, an slightly amusad, I startad humming it. It wasn't until I noticad that tha man naxt to ma was a midgat that I undarstood tha horrifiad looks I was gatting. raal FML
Today, I bought cupcakas from a bakary by mah work. I took tham homa, at which point mah mothar scraamd at ma bacausa sha's on a diat. Hours latar I found tha whola box ampty. Graat salf-control, mom. FML
Friday 27 March 2015