metakirby

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metakirby

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  • Number of visits : 1860
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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metakirby's page activity

Visits<b>xXHollowIchigoXx</b> - the 12/17/2012 at 6:59pm

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50 favourites

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I agree, their lives suck

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metakirby's favorite FMLs

Today, I asked my professor what happened to the assignment I gave him several weeks ago. Turns out he lost it, and graded me zero as a result. Now if I want a mark, he says I'll have to hand-write it all over again, but that I "probably shouldn't bother," because it was "a bit shit, really." FML

by Anonymous / 02/06/2012 at 4:10pm / United States (Idaho) / Miscellaneous

Today, some guy hit my car and then threatened to sue me for "parking my car in such a way that it was impossible not to hit it." My car was in the driveway. FML

by dreefsa / 02/05/2012 at 3:08am / United States (California) / Transportation

Today, the pervert in my computer class asked me if I "mowed my lawn." Not knowing this was a vaguely sexual term, I replied, "No, my dad does." FML

by xX_nsn_Xx / 02/03/2012 at 9:47am / United States (Texas) / Intimacy

Today, it was our class field trip. I got five dollars from ten different people because they wanted me to sit away from them. FML

by Arniii / 02/01/2012 at 1:53pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I found out how it feels when a refrigerator door unhinges and falls on your toes. FML

by kb / 02/01/2012 at 12:06am / United States (Texas) / Health

Today, our school chorus went to a senior citizens' home. An elderly lady died during my solo. FML

by sorrygrandma / 01/31/2012 at 10:34pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Miscellaneous

Today, I found out my little sister is marrying my ex, and that my mother set them up. FML

by Random / 01/31/2012 at 9:41am / United States / Love

Today, I went over to my neighbours' to politely complain about their dog, which had been barking non-stop for hours. This issue has been going on for months, and I finally decided today, of all days, was the day to resolve it. When I got there, they'd just got home from giving birth at the hospital. FML

by Lentil / 01/31/2012 at 8:13am / Australia / Miscellaneous

Today, my grandfather sent everyone in my family an email thanking them for the photo we got him. I'd bought the frame, edited the picture, and delivered it to him. All everyone else did was show up and complain while the picture was being taken. I'm the only one who didn't get a thank you email. FML

by the forgotten one / 01/29/2012 at 10:01pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I found out we have new neighbors in our apartment complex that park in the stall next to our truck. Turns out their car is the same make of our truck. And it also turns out that when I unlock our truck it will set off their car alarm - every time. FML

by delamer / 01/29/2012 at 11:00am / United States (California) / Transportation

Today, I was sitting on a bus. I'm deaf. An old lady looked very angry at me and started talking. Then she looked like she was screaming. I had to type on my phone that I'm deaf. Apparently, I'd been stepping on her foot. She decided to poke me in the eye and type, "Now you're blind too." FML

by Come on / 01/28/2012 at 7:46pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend gave me twelve roses and told me that he would love me until the last one dies. Remembering the Facebook like, I began looking for the fake one but couldn't find it. When I pointed out that all twelve were real and would die within days, he responded, "Exactly." FML

by Shelly P. / 01/28/2012 at 7:10pm / United States (Colorado) / Love

Today, our rodent problem was taken care of. I discovered this when my cat projectile-vomited a soggy, death-scented wad of dark fur and tiny organs onto the couch. FML

by tannarox / 01/28/2012 at 10:46am / United States (California) / Animals

Today, I had to Google how to find the area of a circle. I'm working on my PhD in engineering. FML

by pirsquared / 01/27/2012 at 8:20pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Miscellaneous

Today, I made a drunken bet with friends that I could pour lighter fluid on my hands, light it, and shake it out before I got burned. I lost. FML

by batsu / 01/27/2012 at 1:48am / Canada (British Columbia) / Health