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memphis201

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memphis201

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 3215
  • Number of comments : 12
  • Number of FMLs : 1 confirmed out of 50 posted

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memphis201's page activity

Visits<b>Civilian</b> - the 11/04/2014 at 9:20am<b>kelseysking</b> - the 10/03/2014 at 7:46pm<b>brokenjawskhan</b> - the 09/19/2014 at 1:49am<b>AustinDenton</b> - the 07/30/2014 at 11:29am<b>ireply_wlyrics</b> - the 06/21/2014 at 12:23pm<b>Ian_from_0070</b> - the 06/13/2014 at 10:46am<b>vanna88</b> - the 05/06/2014 at 9:18am<b>niccc7373</b> - the 04/26/2014 at 10:34pm<b>DedicatedNova</b> - the 02/03/2014 at 12:22am<b>dvojplisen</b> - the 01/22/2014 at 8:51pm<b>umakemesic</b> - the 01/17/2014 at 11:26am<b>artiststatement</b> - the 11/30/2013 at 10:35pm<b>Borngemini77</b> - the 10/18/2013 at 7:29am<b>amanda1472</b> - the 08/30/2013 at 8:08pm<b>srbuckley322</b> - the 08/21/2013 at 9:44pm<b>sdunbar06</b> - the 08/12/2013 at 11:24pm<b>ThePaul007</b> - the 08/07/2013 at 1:29am<b>ndndnsns</b> - the 07/31/2013 at 11:36am

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memphis201's favorite FMLs

Today, I walked past a church with a bunch of people standing outside waiting for the bride and groom to walk out. When the church doors opened, I yelled congratulations as loud as I could. It was a funeral. FML

#811533
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19882) - you deserved it (73640)

On 04/05/2009 at 1:20am - misc - by oops (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I went to see my gynecologist. She was writing my symptoms up in my chart on her computer. After a little while, I noticed that she had a confused look on her face and was reading something instead. When I took a peek at the computer screen, I saw that she was Googling my symptoms. FML

#792519
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (90247) - you deserved it (3949)

On 04/03/2009 at 11:10pm - health - by blehhh (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my friends were being rude to me, so I decided to be nice to a boy that didn't have many friends. While I was talking to him he popped a pimple on his face and tasted it. FML

#777672
301 comments

I agree, your life sucks (171057) - you deserved it (30641)

On 04/03/2009 at 1:16am - misc - by lalanon (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I was babysitting for a new family. While the father was telling me about bed times and how to reach him, their dog started humping my leg. As I tried to discreetly push the dog away, his paw got caught in the pocket of my huge sweatpants, pulling them down. I was wearing a thong. FML

#771625
225 comments

I agree, your life sucks (64903) - you deserved it (11052)

On 04/02/2009 at 7:05pm - animals - by darlingditz (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I got into a huge fight with my boyfriend after driving 200 miles to see him. While arguing, I told him I never wanted to see him again and left after slamming the front door. I left my car keys in his kitchen. FML

#768625
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18272) - you deserved it (54784)

On 04/02/2009 at 4:16pm - misc - by nokeys (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, me and my friend decided to spy on my crush. He lives across the street, so we climbed on the roof of my house and watched him with binoculars. He was working out, and after 5 minutes he started writing something. He put a piece of paper against the window and it said, 'Stop watching me.' FML

#650213
225 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14941) - you deserved it (134885)

On 03/27/2009 at 8:24pm - misc - by Creep (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I was at QuickTrip. As I was leaving, I passed a woman who was saying "stay" very sternly through her open driver's side door. I smiled as I passed, saying "Your dog wants to follow you huh? I've been there." She glared at me and said "No. That's my son. He's mentally challenged." FML

#628837
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46506) - you deserved it (24394)

On 03/26/2009 at 7:39pm - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I had my girlfriend over and we we're watching a movie in my basement. I run upstairs and pop a bag of popcorn. Later I come downstairs to find my 10 year old brother sitting next to my girlfriend saying," My brother always says he wants to screw your brains out, whatever that means". FML

#620278
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26509) - you deserved it (69768)

On 03/26/2009 at 11:42am - kids - by CaoNiMa (man) - China (Beijing)

Today, I fell asleep in class. As a joke, my professor used an airhorn to wake me up. I got so freaked out that I punched the girl next to me in the face. She got knocked out. FML

#553935
204 comments

I agree, your life sucks (84392) - you deserved it (31517)

On 03/23/2009 at 3:06pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, when I walked into work all of my co-workers were giggling and asking "How was YOUR night last night?". Last night I had sex for the first time with someone I'm seeing secretly (with good reason). That person is my boss. He told everyone. FML

#548239
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (66499) - you deserved it (28349)

On 03/23/2009 at 2:43am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my crush and I were hooking up and as he slipped his hands up my shirt in order to "feel me up" he started rubbing around my whole torso. When I asked him what he was doing he replied "well I was looking for your boobs but apparently you have none" FML

#544318
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (96041) - you deserved it (8401)

On 03/22/2009 at 11:18pm - intimacy - by tinytitty (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I had to sleep in the same room as my grandparents. They checked to see if I was asleep, so I pretended to be to avoid getting scolded for staying up. Turns out they were checking so that they could make love. I witnessed two 70-year-olds have sex in the bed next to me for 20 minutes. FML

#507959
296 comments

I agree, your life sucks (216539) - you deserved it (28018)

On 03/21/2009 at 11:38am - intimacy - by Mike (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I went over to surprise my girlfriend of two years with flowers and dinner at her apartment. After I knocked, a handsome young man answered the door. Thinking I had the wrong apartment, I apologized, only to hear my girlfriend's voice call from the background, "Baby, who's there?" FML

#504108
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (147585) - you deserved it (7128)

On 03/21/2009 at 1:33am - intimacy - by willywonks (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I went into my older brother's room to get a condom. This happened the other day too when my boyfriend forgot one. So I went in there today and there was a note that said "Little Sister, stop using my condoms. And your boyfriend sounds like a girl when he climaxes." FML

#497309
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29670) - you deserved it (110818)

On 03/20/2009 at 8:43pm - intimacy - by Stacy (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)



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