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mazor

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mazor

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 1459
  • Number of comments : 17
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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mazor's page activity

Visits<b>bsmallz3</b> - the 09/15/2014 at 7:08pm<b>gunda95</b> - the 09/13/2014 at 11:43pm<b>DiJsLifeStyle</b> - the 09/13/2014 at 1:33pm<b>kristabelli</b> - the 05/05/2014 at 4:13pm<b>LAUREN_1053</b> - the 09/08/2013 at 10:46am<b>rosenkrieger223</b> - the 09/06/2013 at 7:49pm<b>phatdaddy62</b> - the 09/06/2013 at 4:29pm<b>iluvpeanutbutter</b> - the 09/06/2013 at 8:50am

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An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

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You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

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mazor's favorite FMLs

Today, I was having sex with this amazingly hot guy. Things got pretty intense, and right as I was about to orgasm, the gold crucifix came flying off his necklace and sliced my eyelid open. Message received. Well played, God. FML

#21262317
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30430) - you deserved it (4489)

On 09/21/2014 at 7:27am - intimacy - by Sinnersinner - United States (California)

Today, while on the bus, a friendly-looking guy smiled at me, so I smiled back. He then pointed at my teeth and said, "You gonna get those fixed, or just keep them as a conversation starter?" FML

Today, a guy asked me out, and I felt butterflies in my stomach. I soon realized that it wasn't butterflies, but an unexpected bowel movement. I stood there awkwardly, looking him in the eyes, then farted hard. FML

#21260355
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37520) - you deserved it (4186)

On 09/17/2014 at 11:14pm - love - by HappilyNeverAfter - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my 4 year old son groped my breasts and said, "This is what daddy told me to do." FML

#21260160
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31940) - you deserved it (3726)

On 09/17/2014 at 5:57pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Michigan)

Today, I was watching a movie with my boyfriend. We were getting into the mood so I tried to eat the popcorn kind of sexually, causing me to choke on the popcorn and throw up. FML

#21257293
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31666) - you deserved it (15758)

On 09/13/2014 at 2:29am - misc - by Nat - United States (Texas)

Today, I had to take my husband's laptop to University for an in-class exam. I opened the screen, and loud porn started to auto-play. The silence in the class was deafening as I tried to make it stop. FML

#21256842
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41042) - you deserved it (5360)

On 09/12/2014 at 9:17am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)

Today, at the restaurant where I work, a guest choked on a bone from her crosscut ribs. She asked me to bring the manager over, so I did. When he got there, she complained that the bone could have seriously injured her, and we should be more careful of where we put the bones in the ribs. FML

#21256772
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38465) - you deserved it (2541)

On 09/12/2014 at 4:05am - work - by Diachronic (man) - United States (Idaho)

Today, I asked out the girl I really like. She turned me down, saying that she's a lesbian. That'd be fine, if I were a guy. FML

#21252521
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40411) - you deserved it (3665)

On 09/05/2014 at 5:11pm - love - by apparentlybutch (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, I complimented a guy on his beard. His response? "Thanks. Wanna sit on it?" FML

Today, I was walking my dogs when a woman at a bus stop quite rudely exclaimed, "Keep those mutts away from my kid". I replied just as rudely that I wouldn't want them anywhere near her dirty sprog. It was then we both realised she was a customer that I regularly talk to at work. FML

Today, I proposed to my girlfriend with a ring from Kay Jewelers. She saw the box, started giggling, whispered, "'Kay", and then started laughing so hard at her joke she had to excuse herself. FML

#21250887
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42886) - you deserved it (5235)

On 09/02/2014 at 11:18pm - love - by very punny (man) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I proposed to my girlfriend. She just grabbed the ring and said in a raspy voice, "My precious..." FML

#21250558
35 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41007) - you deserved it (7793)

On 09/02/2014 at 2:58pm - love - by anonymous - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I asked my girlfriend to talk dirty to me. Her response was to impersonate a saxophone. FML

#21250455
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32144) - you deserved it (7497)

On 09/02/2014 at 11:32am - intimacy - by ihatejasonderulo - United Kingdom (Hounslow)

Today, I work at a bakery. As I was putting out some cakes with fruit on top of them, a customer asked me how we get the little hairs to stay on the raspberries, and if we glue them on. FML

#21249886
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32873) - you deserved it (2777)

On 09/01/2014 at 5:37pm - work - by s0728 - United States (Texas)

Today, I won a gruelling fitness competition, only to find out the mystery prize was a voucher to get 10 free spray tans. I'm black. FML

#21249089
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46645) - you deserved it (3794)

On 08/31/2014 at 2:44pm - misc - by disappointedjamaican - United Kingdom (Coventry)



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