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maverik5124

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maverik5124

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
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  • Number of visits : 2356
  • Number of comments : 17
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

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Visits<b>ireply_wlyrics</b> - the 07/07/2013 at 9:03pm

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maverik5124's favorite FMLs

Today, working as a nurse, I asked a 61-year-old patient if he did any physical activity. His reply was, "Well, I do masturbate a lot". He then went on to describe the various techniques he uses. FML

#17643019
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31629) - you deserved it (3758)

On 09/02/2011 at 8:47am - intimacy - by rochellamaya - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I was getting a bit intimate with my boyfriend. Just when things were getting interesting, my dog managed to get into my room. He jumped on the bed and my boyfriend spent the next 20 minutes playing with the dog, while I sat next to him, half naked. FML

#17575324
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28098) - you deserved it (4163)

On 08/25/2011 at 3:12am - intimacy - by Puppy Loverr - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I discovered the reason my favorite stick of deodorant hasn't smelled right for the past two weeks. My dad uses it on his butt crack and balls "to clean up the stank". FML

#17404409
288 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52531) - you deserved it (3505)

On 08/08/2011 at 3:16am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I realized that as a U.S. Marine in the infantry, I'm more afraid to talk to girls than I am of getting shot at. FML

#17352313
263 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40994) - you deserved it (5496)

On 08/03/2011 at 3:40am - love - by Tim - United States

Today, my boyfriend decided it'd be funny to create a "place" on Facebook for my vagina. Now he "checks-in" every time we have sex. FML

#17338945
333 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51235) - you deserved it (9845)

On 08/02/2011 at 12:52am - intimacy - by INside (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, while having sex, my boyfriend decided to sing the Star Wars theme song as he entered his penis into me. FML

#17304826
304 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37636) - you deserved it (9720)

On 07/30/2011 at 1:14am - intimacy - by Taylor - United States (Texas)

Today, my boyfriend and I had sex, and it was my first time being on top. I got so into it that when I went to put my hands on the wall for support, the shelf above my bed snapped, with my favorite little cactus falling onto his face. FML

#17294808
222 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37822) - you deserved it (9727)

On 07/29/2011 at 3:24am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, it was hot out, so I opted to stay cool and wear my bathing suit all day. My mom took it as me rubbing in the fact that I'm thinner than her and grounded me. FML

#17242973
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36298) - you deserved it (5202)

On 07/24/2011 at 4:21pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, as I was hung over from a concert and refusing to get out of bed, my dad decided to hook up his top notch speaker system and play Christmas music that shook the house. It's July. Let the family weekend begin. FML

#17228318
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23039) - you deserved it (14098)

On 07/23/2011 at 10:18am - kids - by lauramarie (woman) - Canada

Today, I accidentally asked a one-armed man which arm he wanted me to take blood from. He asked for a different nurse. FML

#17207535
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13864) - you deserved it (43285)

On 07/21/2011 at 7:35pm - work - by ohmygosh - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my boyfriend proposed to me by tossing the ring at me and saying "Here, wear this." FML

#17194109
354 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48180) - you deserved it (7818)

On 07/20/2011 at 7:07pm - love - by Username - United States

Today, my boyfriend told me my vagina looks like an old man in a hat. It's OK though, he said it was a nice hat. FML

#17187875
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39133) - you deserved it (5366)

On 07/20/2011 at 5:17am - intimacy - by growlr - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I found out my boyfriend has checked every girl he has ever slept with for 'vagina teeth'. I'm apparently no exception. FML

#17184971
380 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36118) - you deserved it (5290)

On 07/20/2011 at 12:40am - intimacy - by knolan - United States

Today, I found out my boyfriend has checked every girl he has ever slept with for 'vagina teeth'. I'm apparently no exception. FML

#17184971
380 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36118) - you deserved it (5290)

On 07/20/2011 at 12:40am - intimacy - by knolan - United States

Today, I surprised my four year old daughter with a stuffed dinosaur. She named it 'Horny.' FML

#17145702
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34620) - you deserved it (7591)

On 07/17/2011 at 3:14am - kids - by douglas - United States (Washington)



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