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maverik5124

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maverik5124

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1972
  • Number of comments : 17
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

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Visits<b>ireply_wlyrics</b> - the 07/07/2013 at 9:03pm

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maverik5124's favorite FMLs

Today, my parents were out, so I lit up my first ever joint. I got so stoned out of my mind that when my dad came back home and asked what the smell was, I said a stray cat had left an upper-decker in the toilet. He found the joint in my room, and now I'm grounded for the rest of the school year. FML

#19059244
219 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9698) - you deserved it (73835)

On 02/12/2012 at 7:01pm - misc - by Alyssa - United States

Today, I realised how socially inept I am, when I muttered an apology to my laptop after I noticed I hadn't plugged its charger in. FML

#19001637
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19965) - you deserved it (5822)

On 02/05/2012 at 2:39pm - misc - by KDM - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I was getting intimate with my girlfriend. It was going well until she started talking dirty, saying stuff like, "You like my tushy, baby?" "I want to fellate you so bad," and "You'll need some ice after this one." My boner practically retracted into my body. FML

#18954927
264 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30824) - you deserved it (4965)

On 01/30/2012 at 7:25pm - intimacy - by ugh (man) - United States

Today, while my boyfriend and I were in the shower, we began to get a bit frisky. That was until I lifted my arms and he immediately made one of his "Chewbacca Calls." He was referring to my armpits that I had forgotten to shave. FML

#18867304
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14290) - you deserved it (25290)

On 01/21/2012 at 12:47am - love - by Reliena (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I was walking to the bus stop when someone slapped an innocent person in the face with a fish. I was that innocent person. FML

#18812835
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31408) - you deserved it (3354)

On 01/15/2012 at 5:24am - misc - by lolwtfbbq444 - Australia

Today, my boyfriend stated that we should play a game where one person asks the other a question, and they answer it with a picture. I thought it sounded fun so I said yes. His first question was, "Do you shave your vagina?" FML

#18802490
180 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26611) - you deserved it (8602)

On 01/14/2012 at 1:52am - intimacy - by haggisbowl - United States

Today, I met my son for the first time since I had to put him up for adoption over two decades ago. I wanted to make amends and get to know him. Instead, all I got to know was how well he can throw a punch. FML

#18799303
346 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20057) - you deserved it (51128)

On 01/13/2012 at 8:38pm - kids - by me (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I went to the gynecologist for the first time. I was so nervous that when she extended her hand to shake mine, I gave her my handbag instead. FML

#18792975
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22394) - you deserved it (3683)

On 01/13/2012 at 2:48am - health - by shellie - Reserved

Today, my girlfriend's Marine dad walked in on us fooling around naked. Now we can only hang out with "parental supervision". Oh, and I have to record my visits on a clipboard by the door. FML

#18785732
234 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20947) - you deserved it (34857)

On 01/12/2012 at 3:16pm - intimacy - by Duplighost (man) - United States (Colorado)

Today, my boyfriend asked me for a blow job. After I said "no" over ten times, he decided to get up and slap me across the face with his penis. FML

#18744677
231 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49159) - you deserved it (46241)

On 01/08/2012 at 9:36am - intimacy - by omgwhyme (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I was surprised that my husband suggested we take a shower together to save water. He also suggested we should wear our bathing suits so we don't have to see each others "privates." FML

#18744255
199 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51710) - you deserved it (4404)

On 01/08/2012 at 7:24am - intimacy - by anonymous - United States (Virginia)

Today, I went down on my boyfriend for the first time. Afterwards, he laid on the bed, silent and naked in the fetal position, I had to sit there stroking his head for an hour. I think I raped my boyfriend. FML

#18483356
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48499) - you deserved it (7723)

On 12/11/2011 at 6:54am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, my husband and I got into an argument. I tried to assault him with a laptop. He yelled, "Don't hit me with the computer." My apartment neighbor yelled through the wall, "Do what you gotta do, girl." FML

#18439975
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14607) - you deserved it (39183)

On 12/05/2011 at 9:31pm - love - by Anonymous - United States

Today, at my job as a waitress, I fell, landed on my ass, managing not to spill the drinks or drop the food in my hands. A little boy yelled "NINJA WAITRESS!" Every one at work has been calling me that all day, and purposely been trying to trip me to see if I could do it again. FML

#18390822
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34924) - you deserved it (5302)

On 11/30/2011 at 12:39am - work - by immy504 - United States (Louisiana)

Today, I went to go get my driver's license, only to be told that I need a copy of my birth certificate. In order to get the copy of my birth certificate, I need a driver's license or my passport. In order to get a passport, I need a copy of my birth certificate or a drivers license. I have none. FML

#18385235
241 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42548) - you deserved it (4944)

On 11/29/2011 at 1:40pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States



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