Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

maverik5124

Search for a member

maverik5124

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1894
  • Number of comments : 17
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

maverik5124's page activity

Visits<b>ireply_wlyrics</b> - the 07/07/2013 at 9:03pm

maverik5124's FML badges

A new Thumb

You’ve used your thumb on 1000 comments.

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

Beginner

You have looked through 5 pages of the website. That’s a start.

See all of maverik5124's badges

maverik5124's favorite FMLs

Today, I found out that in the three years I've been dating my boyfriend, his parents have secretly been going through all of his emails, including the ones I've sent him with "sexy" pictures attached. I can't look his parents in the eye without being reminded that they've both seen me naked. FML

#13818432
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21660) - you deserved it (13085)

On 11/12/2010 at 7:30pm - intimacy - by penguins (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I need to find a way to explain to my 5, 7 and 12 year old kids their uncle wants to become their aunt. FML

#13773002
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49716) - you deserved it (9419)

On 11/09/2010 at 12:32am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, while cleaning out my garage, I found a pregnant spider. I couldn't step on the spider without releasing the baby spiders, so I went inside to get a glass jar to trap it. While trying to relocate the spider, I accidentally stepped on it. I now have a bunch of baby spiders roaming around. FML

#13657606
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24013) - you deserved it (6343)

On 10/31/2010 at 12:25am - animals - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my boyfriend and I decided to have sex for the first time. While we were undressing each other, he said, "Wow, if we have children, you're gonna have to shave, or they'll die from rug-burn as they come out!" FML

#13654098
209 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34748) - you deserved it (27648)

On 10/30/2010 at 8:37pm - intimacy - by tht1chk - United States (California)

Today, the only one that became aroused while looking at me in my sexy Halloween costume was my dog. FML

#13650212
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19831) - you deserved it (11265)

On 10/30/2010 at 2:09pm - intimacy - by Shelly - United States (Florida)

Today, my boyfriend described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur.' FML

#13493485
177 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10955) - you deserved it (34642)

On 10/18/2010 at 12:10am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my sister and I were both on Facebook, updating our statuses. I set mine to "just got released from hospital with Baby Lily", as I'd had a baby earlier this week. My sister set hers to "menstrual blood smells like shrimp". Her status got 37 likes. Mine got none. FML

#13469972
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32550) - you deserved it (6391)

On 10/16/2010 at 8:31am - love - by married (woman) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I was giving my boyfriend road head. He closed his eyes when he came, and crashed into a pole. I have whiplash, and a very very angry father. FML

#13321339
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9308) - you deserved it (54040)

On 10/04/2010 at 8:47pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I went to a zoo that had a gorilla in a cage. I walked up, and the gorilla stopped what he was doing, looked me in the eyes, and started jacking off. FML

#13005397
294 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37878) - you deserved it (9626)

On 09/11/2010 at 3:25pm - intimacy - by gorillalove - United States (Texas)

Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex for the first time when my 4 year old sister walked in. She thought we were making a dog pile, so just as soon as my boyfriend was about to finish, she jumped on his back. FML

#12948197
177 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26189) - you deserved it (22294)

On 09/07/2010 at 12:06pm - intimacy - by Ashley - United States (California)

Today, I put a tampon in. The string broke. I had to go to the hospital to get it out. FML

#12894128
237 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39998) - you deserved it (6547)

On 09/03/2010 at 11:47pm - health - by lalalasmiles06 -

Today, my boyfriend questioned why I always put my shirts in the dryer right before wearing them. I told him it was because the dryer causes my shirts to regain their form and tightness. His response: "You should throw your vagina in there along with them." FML

#12822018
230 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39295) - you deserved it (14812)

On 08/30/2010 at 1:51pm - intimacy - by FYouBoyfriend (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was watching TV when a Dentyne gum commercial came on and stated that the average person spends more than 20,000 minutes kissing. I've spent less than three. FML

#12786707
287 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29898) - you deserved it (5505)

On 08/28/2010 at 12:19pm - love - by doesntkissalot - United States (Florida)

Today, my brother's girlfriend and my girlfriend went out shopping. My brother's girlfriend bought a pair of killer black heels and a box of condoms. My girlfriend bought a pair of orange Crocs and a vibrator. FML

#12408550
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40613) - you deserved it (13268)

On 08/09/2010 at 9:24am - intimacy - by Mikey832 (man) - United Kingdom (Cheshire)

Today, I was looking through my boyfriends phone, when I found a naked picture of myself. Too bad I haven't sent him any. Ever. FML

#12187876
218 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34602) - you deserved it (13541)

On 07/29/2010 at 2:28pm - intimacy - by Sunshine.0.ninja - United States (Ohio)



FML's blog

  • FML on vacation #1: Getting there
  • A lot of people will spout off the tired old cliché that the destination isn't as important as the journey itself. Well, what if you're on your way to the Playboy Mansion then?…

Tuesday 22 July 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: