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mattman1994

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mattman1994

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 12 April 1994 (20 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 6777
  • Number of comments : 472
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 6 posted

About mattman1994 : I'm Matt. I like art, football, and I play the guitar. I like to make people laugh.

I'm 16, of course I'm not going to shut up

mattman1994's page activity

Visits<b>ChaCerCam1</b> - 19 hours ago<b>XBurytheCastleX</b> - the 09/16/2014 at 6:59pm<b>BigSeedDeed99</b> - the 09/16/2014 at 1:52pm<b>polarbearpiss</b> - the 09/13/2014 at 9:47am<b>Hunterx700</b> - the 09/11/2014 at 1:05am<b>sims_addict16</b> - the 09/08/2014 at 6:34pm<b>InfinaDerp</b> - the 09/08/2014 at 7:39am<b>RvBCaboose</b> - the 09/02/2014 at 12:31pm<b>akacruz</b> - the 08/30/2014 at 9:22pm<b>cattturine</b> - the 08/28/2014 at 7:09pm<b>AcousticKid1</b> - the 08/27/2014 at 6:30pm<b>Firewar</b> - the 08/16/2014 at 10:34pm<b>lui_pg</b> - the 08/10/2014 at 2:29pm<b>Kordellf</b> - the 08/10/2014 at 2:29pm<b>Liamj774</b> - the 08/08/2014 at 11:26pm<b>Gemma_Mansonite</b> - the 08/08/2014 at 7:26am<b>Nerfherder69</b> - the 08/03/2014 at 10:33am<b>Bullet75</b> - the 07/30/2014 at 4:47pm

mattman1994's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

mattman1994's favorite FMLs

Today, I was sucking on a Tic Tac. Just as I was starting to get into it, the Tic-Tac suddenly shot down my throat. After a minute of coughing and gagging, it came back up... out my left nostril. FML

#13652209
170 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32260) - you deserved it (5512)

On 10/30/2010 at 5:28pm - health - by DeepTaccer (man) - United Kingdom (Norfolk)

Today, at an Aunt's wake, my five year old son walked up to the coffin, and, with the whole family around him, exclaimed, "Well that's good, I was wondering where she's been." FML

#13635730
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27614) - you deserved it (3060)

On 10/29/2010 at 4:31am - kids - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my dads cremated remains came in the mail. This is the first time, in my entire adult life, that he has visited me at my home. FML

#13512801
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33082) - you deserved it (2334)

On 10/19/2010 at 3:40pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I had to sneeze really bad in a restaurant. To avoid sneezing on everybody's food, I turned my head to the side and sneezed, it just so happens a waitress was there serving a table. My nose went straight into her ass. FML

#13274666
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26953) - you deserved it (5374)

On 10/01/2010 at 9:06am - health - by Embarrassed - United States

Today, my chemistry professor made us all leave our classroom mid-lab because the class was complaining of the smell, and he was worried that there was a gas leak from one of the Bunsen burners. There wasn't, but it's nice to know my "silent but deadly" smelled like it might actually kill. FML

#13169331
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10000) - you deserved it (32993)

On 09/23/2010 at 12:19pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I spent the entire day at school being called Meg. My name isn't Meg, so I started to get really annoyed and confused. Later, I found out it was because I look like Meg from the show Family Guy. She's known for being unpopular, unwanted, ugly, and stupid. FML

#13145609
303 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33314) - you deserved it (5887)

On 09/21/2010 at 6:47pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, at dinner, my grandmother informed us that my cousin's newborn baby has been having seizures. My verbal filter did not switch on in time and I replied, "It's not a seizure if you're shaking it." FML

#12978436
232 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8431) - you deserved it (38136)

On 09/09/2010 at 4:04pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was in a public restroom with my 4 year old daughter. I took her in the stall with me, and as I was using the restroom she looked down and loudly asked, "Mommy! Why do you have a beard on your peepee?!!" Then I heard everybody in the stalls next to us laughing. FML

#12677495
262 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41718) - you deserved it (12561)

On 08/22/2010 at 2:58am - kids - by Bailey - United States (Nebraska)

Today, my mom revealed to me that when I was in Preschool, I used to get caught in the bathroom with little boys while I was feeling their "no no" area. I was giving hand jobs to boys before I could read. FML

#6768891
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28251) - you deserved it (6929)

On 12/15/2009 at 9:20pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was eating MandMs on a chair when I dropped one and it fell under my crotch. My mom came in to see my hand on my crotch and me muttering, "Where is that little bastard?" FML

#5187635
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59142) - you deserved it (15253)

On 09/11/2009 at 2:26pm - misc - by awilson (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I was trying to have sex with my boyfriend, David. I moaned his name and he whispered, "I'm not David." Then, with an Italian accent, he said, "It's-a-me! Mario!" FML

#4882481
346 comments

I agree, your life sucks (62986) - you deserved it (16004)

On 08/28/2009 at 1:11pm - intimacy - by Michelle (woman) - United States (Maine)

Today, I was responsible for taking care of Hoppers, the rabbit belonging to my sons 3rd grade class. Tomorrow my son returns Hoppers so the next student can care for him. That won't be happening because Hoppers hopped out my 5th story window. FML

#1091481
229 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61206) - you deserved it (13878)

On 04/18/2009 at 5:12pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I was responsible for taking care of Hoppers, the rabbit belonging to my sons 3rd grade class. Tomorrow my son returns Hoppers so the next student can care for him. That won't be happening because Hoppers hopped out my 5th story window. FML

#1091481
229 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61206) - you deserved it (13878)

On 04/18/2009 at 5:12pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I was responsible for taking care of Hoppers, the rabbit belonging to my sons 3rd grade class. Tomorrow my son returns Hoppers so the next student can care for him. That won't be happening because Hoppers hopped out my 5th story window. FML

#1091481
229 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61206) - you deserved it (13878)

On 04/18/2009 at 5:12pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Colorado)



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