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mattb801

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mattb801

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  • Number of visits : 84
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  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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mattb801's page activity

Visits<b>jasmine2301</b> - the 09/13/2013 at 9:10pm<b>nemo88</b> - the 06/05/2013 at 11:06pm

mattb801's FML badges

Judgmental

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Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

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You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

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mattb801's favorite FMLs

Today, a coworker thought it would be funny to put a tack on my chair. When I sat down, it went directly into my butt. When I sprang up, I hit my head on a lamp. I then hit my head on my desk on the way down. FML

#18904057
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30777) - you deserved it (2685)

On 01/25/2012 at 12:03am - work - by Benjamin - United States (California)

Today, while taking a shower, I saw shadows moving across the curtains. The shadow turned out to be a cricket that then fell into the tub. I ran out of the bathroom screaming and naked. My little sister came to my door and said, "If I hadn't just seen your balls, I would swear mom had TWO daughters." FML

#6712676
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11557) - you deserved it (36765)

On 12/11/2009 at 8:03pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was working at a hospital-level rest home. I was making the rounds when I noticed a woman was sitting in her (electric) wheelchair in the middle of the hall. Going closer I saw her battery was flat so I said "Uh-oh! Looks like you've died." She bawled her eyes out and said "Not yet." FML

#5144800
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13348) - you deserved it (48718)

On 09/09/2009 at 5:58am - misc - by Anonymous - New Zealand (Otago)

Today, I passed a homeless person asking for change. When I politely apologized and told him I had none, he yelled angrily "who comes to this city without money?" I replied "apparently, you do." Wrong answer. He followed me, now screaming. FML

#4029321
205 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45452) - you deserved it (26234)

On 07/25/2009 at 12:39pm - money - by re2K5 (man) - Korea Republic of (Kyongsang-bukto)

Today, I greeted a mom and a little girl at the place where I work. The little girl looks at me, looks back at her mom, and says, "Mommy, I hate people." FML

#19635
30 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32881) - you deserved it (2304)

On 02/10/2009 at 12:58am - misc - by neversayhiagain (woman) - United States (Kansas)

Today, I fell down the stairs twice. I fell from the top, stopped in the middle, stood up, stepped down one more step, tripped, and fell down the rest of the stairs. FML

#4121
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28809) - you deserved it (4918)

On 01/31/2009 at 12:25pm - misc - by Lars - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I fell down the stairs twice. I fell from the top, stopped in the middle, stood up, stepped down one more step, tripped, and fell down the rest of the stairs. FML

#4121
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28809) - you deserved it (4918)

On 01/31/2009 at 12:25pm - misc - by Lars - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I was teaching a class but kids were chatting. After 3 soap box speeches about "The next person who talks gets a note to take home," one kid looked right at me and went "meow". FML

#891
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20857) - you deserved it (6537)

On 01/09/2009 at 3:54am - kids - by Liz - Sent from mobile version



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  • Everybody's talking about Ebola at the moment. I have trouble keeping up with the latest trends. I'm going to wait until Christmas and see what special offers turn up in the shops, under funky new names…

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