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marmots

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marmots
  • Town/Country : Canada
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1976
  • Number of comments : 60
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

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marmots's favorite FMLs

Today, after I have spent $3,000 dollars in preparations to move in with my girlfriend of 2 and 1/2 years, she confesses she's a mental patient who stole someone elses identity. She was telling the truth. FML

#5811757
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34839) - you deserved it (3026)

On 10/13/2009 at 2:38am - misc - by IMayBeAFool (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I was taking a bubble bath, and had my iPod touch on the side of my bathtub so I could listen to my music. My dog walked up to the side of the tub, looked me in the eye, and nudged my iPod into the water. FML

#5789992
170 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11223) - you deserved it (48766)

On 10/12/2009 at 1:36am - animals - by bubbles (woman) - United States

Today, I was walking out of class when I saw a girl enthusiastically run to her boyfriend, jump on him, and smother him with kisses. I thought to myself "I wish my girlfriend did that." When the girl jumped off and turned around I realized she did, just not to me. FML

#5689238
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49851) - you deserved it (2313)

On 10/06/2009 at 8:04pm - misc - by zitroskies (man) - United States (California)

Today, I went to the coffee shop for my usual morning latte before class. When I got my drink, I asked again to make sure it was soy. The barista assured me it was. It wasn't. I'm ridiculously lactose intolerant and just spent six hours throwing up because she was too lazy to correct her mistake. FML

#5564287
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36589) - you deserved it (3013)

On 09/30/2009 at 11:12am - health - by sick (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I got my wisdom teeth pulled. Apparently the medicines don't work on me. I woke up in the middle of the surgery and felt EVERYTHING. One of the nurses asked if I was okay, and the doctor just kept saying "Don't worry she's just dreaming", while tears were pouring down my face. FML

#5310529
194 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44811) - you deserved it (1534)

On 09/17/2009 at 10:31am - health - by NoPainNoGain (woman) - United States (California)

Today, while my girlfriend and I were getting it on, she suddenly stopped and yelled "STOP!". I stopped, scared I'd hurt her. She then yelled "HAMMER TIME!" and started to dance. We never finished. FML

#5286193
189 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25731) - you deserved it (4757)

On 09/16/2009 at 1:19am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Rhode Island)

Today, I found out my mom was getting remarried, to my dad. He's been in prison for five years because he pushed her out a window. FML

#5116471
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52804) - you deserved it (2060)

On 09/07/2009 at 10:28pm - misc - by kennedygeeee (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I was at an amusement park with my kids. When we were on the Ferris wheel, I discovered my fear of heights. I hyperventilated, screamed from our seat "LET ME OUT! OH GOD LET ME OUT!!" I also began crying hysterically. They stopped the ride for me to get off. I'm a 45 year old man. FML

#4970470
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34287) - you deserved it (12951)

On 09/01/2009 at 2:30am - health - by pussyOUT (man) - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex. After about 10 minutes, when we change positions, he shouts: "Power Rangers - Transform!" FML

#4636801
267 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54839) - you deserved it (10826)

On 08/18/2009 at 7:45pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I ran into my ex-boyfriend who dumped me after 2 1/2 years because I got fat. The last two years I've lost 68 lbs, am happier and couldn't wait to shove that in his face. So, of course the first time he see's me I'm alone, pushing a shopping cart full of ice cream for a party later. FML

#3593405
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45043) - you deserved it (5502)

On 07/08/2009 at 9:28pm - love - by WeightAMinute (woman) - United States (Illinois)



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