Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

mario2012

Offline (the 01/27/2014 at 4:22am) | Search for a member

mario2012

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Saturday 12 December 1981 (32 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 3114
  • Number of comments : 413
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

mario2012's page activity

Visits<b>kelseysking</b> - the 11/15/2014 at 3:01pm<b>fantasyworld</b> - the 11/09/2014 at 8:25am<b>ilikeoreos222</b> - the 11/07/2014 at 5:24pm<b>ethan043</b> - the 11/02/2014 at 8:22am<b>epic174</b> - the 10/21/2014 at 11:32am<b>JHPugh</b> - the 09/27/2014 at 10:42pm<b>FusionPlacebo</b> - the 09/09/2014 at 2:56pm<b>crazyostrichlady</b> - the 08/29/2014 at 5:12pm<b>toiletgod</b> - the 08/20/2014 at 1:22pm<b>MrAwesomenezz</b> - the 08/16/2014 at 2:32pm<b>username869</b> - the 07/27/2014 at 12:12am<b>Tobiaspe</b> - the 07/06/2014 at 3:33pm<b>Robbieisadowg</b> - the 06/30/2014 at 7:53am<b>ghostsoul21</b> - the 06/29/2014 at 1:59pm<b>iPoptard</b> - the 06/29/2014 at 1:34pm<b>MsMarti</b> - the 06/26/2014 at 10:36am<b>JustTemporary</b> - the 06/24/2014 at 4:19am<b>SIimShady</b> - the 06/17/2014 at 6:59pm

mario2012's FML badges

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

Socialite

You’ve used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…

Profile completed

You’ve filled out the necessary details. Having done so will be much appreciated.

See all of mario2012's badges

mario2012's favorite FMLs

Today, my water broke. I called my mom, who had agreed to watch my other two kids while I went to the hospital. When I asked her to come over, she just said, "Sorry, now isn't a good time." FML

#20781242
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47655) - you deserved it (3253)

On 07/14/2013 at 12:32am - health - by Upset Mommy - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were out cliff jumping, when for the first time, he told me he loved me. I panicked and pushed him over the edge and into the water. He's now in hospital. FML

#20770545
252 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30204) - you deserved it (66584)

On 07/08/2013 at 1:27pm - love - by Erica (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I had to get an MRI. I double and triple checked to make sure there was no out-of-pocket cost. When I arrived at the testing center, I was expected to pay full price for the test. It costs $2,360. FML

#20770351
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44915) - you deserved it (3563)

On 07/08/2013 at 10:48am - health - by insurance lies - United States

Today, I was asked to help my sister clean her room. The moment I opened the door, I was greeted by her screaming "TASTE THE RAINBOW" with a full mouth. She then spat the skittles into my face. FML

#20768354
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42712) - you deserved it (4403)

On 07/07/2013 at 6:55am - kids - by tastetherainbow - United States (Texas)

Today, I was working as a nurse, and an elderly man had just passed away. As the patient's wife was leaving she said, "Thank you for taking such good care of my husband." Then I, intending to say "Sorry for your loss," said "Thank you for your loss." FML

#20758244
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47310) - you deserved it (8584)

On 07/01/2013 at 4:35pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I was explaining to my son that porn isn't a realistic depiction of sex. Just as I finished explaining to him that threesomes rarely happen in real life, he started crying. I feel like a dream-crushing monster. FML

#20756438
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48271) - you deserved it (9361)

On 06/30/2013 at 5:44pm - kids - by sorry, kiddo (man) - Belgium (Brussels Hoofdstedelijk Gewest)

Today, I bought some makeup supplies at the supermarket. The cashier snorted and muttered, "Not enough in the world for you." FML

#20756122
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44051) - you deserved it (3508)

On 06/30/2013 at 2:09pm - misc - by foreversingle (woman) - Netherlands (Noord-Brabant)

Today, what started off as an amazing date with my girlfriend ended with me driving her drunk ass home while she sat in the backseat making out with her new boyfriend. FML

Today, my husband finally returned from his 18-month deployment. Sexually starved, we wasted no time getting busy. Later as we finally cooled off, I got a message from my Aunt. She was hiding in our closet the whole time to surprise us with cake for his safe return. FML

#20743795
214 comments

I agree, your life sucks (79450) - you deserved it (7233)

On 06/24/2013 at 12:37am - intimacy - by jgtrflynn (woman) - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, I went on a date with a seemingly really awesome guy. It went quite well, until dessert came and he started telling me why bestiality "isn't really so wrong, you know?" Riiiggghhttt. Looks like I'm still single. FML

#20742848
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43387) - you deserved it (3955)

On 06/23/2013 at 3:39pm - love - by kittyfiddlernono (woman) - Bulgaria (Pernik)

Today, I took my cat to the vet. The creepy vet looked me in the eyes and said, "This isn't the only pussy I'll be checking out today." FML

#20742647
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51527) - you deserved it (3671)

On 06/23/2013 at 1:26pm - misc - by o_O (woman) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, I heard my roommate moaning my name in the shower. FML

#20728960
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60642) - you deserved it (6237)

On 06/16/2013 at 7:37am - intimacy - by idontwanttoknow - United States

Today, my mom walked into the bathroom while I was taking a pic to send to my long-distance boyfriend. She then told me I would go to hell for flaunting myself at guys. I was fully clothed, sending a pic to see if he liked my new haircut. That and I'm 21. FML

#20716841
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55008) - you deserved it (4209)

On 06/10/2013 at 1:13am - misc - by Crazy Mom (woman) - United States

Today, I went to the local pharmacy to buy some condoms. When I went to go purchase them, the elderly lady behind the counter took one look at me and said, "Honey, you're your own birth control." FML

#20715175
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56991) - you deserved it (9864)

On 06/09/2013 at 10:29am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, after telling my mother-in-law about my recent miscarriage, she cheerfully made a cake to celebrate. FML

#20714826
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48944) - you deserved it (3282)

On 06/09/2013 at 2:02am - misc - by Anoymous - United States (California)



Emily Chan's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Emily Chan's Illustrated FML
  • This week, we landed a spacecraft on a comet. Not FML, though. You've got to admit that the human brain is quite amazing when it comes to resources, creativity and inventing new ways to push things forward. On…

Friday 14 November 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: