About manic_maniac11 : I wish I had something funny to say here or perhaps a piece of insightful observational humor I could share but alas, I'm simply not that interesting.
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manic_maniac11's favorite FMLs
by 613tanner / 05/19/2011 at 1:30am / Transportation
Today, we got a new dry-erase board, and I drew the Gotham City skyline complete with the Bat Signal. Later, I went downstairs, only to find my mom had written "BATMAN'S GAY" over the top of the picture. FML
by Anon / 05/18/2011 at 7:47am / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous
Today, my girlfriend finally got a Facebook account. Too bad she doesn't know the difference between a wall post and a message. She just described how much she enjoyed our sex last night, in great detail. My mom liked it. FML
by anon / 01/31/2011 at 5:46pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Intimacy
Today, I had a job interview. When I got there, the lady interviewing me shook my hand and said, 'Hello, I'm gay.' I found this strange and I didn't know what to say, so I stated, 'Aw, it's OK, I support you.' She looked pretty offended, and I realized why when I found out that her name was Gaye. FML
by Anonymous / 11/04/2010 at 5:18am / United States (Michigan) / Work
Today, I found out that my employers hired me under the assumption that I was gay. Apparently, they are attempting to be perceived as more open-minded. I'm not gay, but I'm afraid being straight could cost me my job. FML
by confused / 09/02/2010 at 5:09pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Work
by merse / 02/18/2010 at 8:20am / United States (North Carolina) / Love
Today, I found out my little sister was a stripper. At the same time, she found out that when I said I was having a "quiet birthday with some friends," what I really meant was "hiring a stripper to jump out of a cake." FML
by Jon / 01/18/2010 at 3:26pm / United States (Oregon) / Miscellaneous
by crappygirlfriend / 01/10/2010 at 2:59am / United States (Kentucky) / Miscellaneous
Today, my entire extended family was over for Christmas. I opened a gift to see that it was a fruitcake and saw everyone looking at me, smiling. This is their way to tell me that they know I'm gay and that they accept me. I'm straight. FML
by notgay / 12/25/2009 at 2:34pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
by SheWentCrayola / 10/16/2009 at 10:04pm / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous
by betchyo / 10/01/2009 at 2:10am / United States (Massachusetts) / Intimacy
Today, I was swimming in the ocean, not too far off shore. I had asked my mom to come in, but she was afraid of the water because fish had nipped at her toes or something back in the day. I told her there was nothing to fear. I ended up getting stung in the balls by a Jelly fish. FML
by The_HML / 03/23/2009 at 10:48pm / United States (Maryland) / Holidays
Today, I was having sex with a guy I met and in the middle of it his mother called him. After stopping to answer the phone, he tried to put me on with her because she didn't believe anyone would actually sleep with him. FML
by MarMar / 03/15/2009 at 4:47pm / United States (Oregon) / Intimacy
by Mick / 02/20/2009 at 3:29am / United States (Colorado) / Miscellaneous
Today, I went to the doctor for my yearly checkup. After getting my blood-pressure taken, my finger pricked, etc, the doctor began to ask me some questions. When asked if I was sexually active, I responded "Yes". The doctor started laughing. FML
by jons / 02/17/2009 at 4:54pm / United States (Connecticut) / Intimacy
- 1Today, someone stole my purse and phone while I was giving CPR to someone who had a heart attack on… 2Today, my boyfriend said I didn't give him enough attention because of my busy work life. So… he… 3Today, I was making the daily commute to work when suddenly my mother calls me, crying that there's…