Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

mandyk5918

Offline (the 11/26/2014 at 12:02am) | Search for a member

mandyk5918

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Sunday 27 October 1996 (18 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 359
  • Number of comments : 48
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

mandyk5918's page activity

Visits<b>amandam21</b> - the 06/14/2014 at 4:08pm<b>DHoang22</b> - the 05/13/2014 at 3:26am<b>FrankHotpants</b> - the 05/10/2014 at 8:00pm<b>JayBunny</b> - the 05/09/2014 at 9:41am<b>PCJJacket</b> - the 05/06/2014 at 10:34pm<b>bigboi1992</b> - the 05/06/2014 at 12:48pm<b>PsychoNyanCat</b> - the 12/03/2013 at 10:39pm<b>hendy34</b> - the 11/26/2013 at 9:17pm<b>Vnzlan_girl</b> - the 11/05/2013 at 1:27pm<b>mein_blut69</b> - the 11/05/2013 at 12:09pm<b>Jessica1239</b> - the 08/17/2013 at 10:09am<b>taylor27gang</b> - the 07/08/2013 at 12:06pm<b>FATTY_MCDOOGLE</b> - the 07/07/2013 at 11:27am<b>bobbyb13</b> - the 07/06/2013 at 9:02pm<b>pipefitter69</b> - the 07/06/2013 at 9:00pm<b>Hammer940</b> - the 07/06/2013 at 11:25am<b>woiz</b> - the 06/05/2013 at 6:10am<b>dfens</b> - the 05/30/2013 at 7:13am

mandyk5918's FML badges

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

See all of mandyk5918's badges

mandyk5918's favorite FMLs

Today, my five year old sister won't stop saying, "shit buckle fuckle ton." My boyfriend's excuse was that he was teaching her how to rhyme. FML

#21303585
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24475) - you deserved it (2589)

On 11/21/2014 at 10:29pm - kids - by angkal2002 - Australia

Today, my boss flipped me off in traffic on my way to work. FML

#21303116
45 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28465) - you deserved it (3465)

On 11/21/2014 at 1:11am - work - by TJ AJ RJ / IV the V - United States (California)

Today, I was rock climbing. I had my equipment on and I saw a really cute girl. I went for the hardest climb in the gym, and while jumping up to grab the rock, I simultaneously farted, missed the rock, fell to the mat and broke my arm in the process. FML

#21303024
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30821) - you deserved it (14596)

On 11/20/2014 at 10:25pm - misc - by AOart1st (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was sitting on a bench at the local park, eating a banana. A guy old enough to be my grandfather walked by, turned to look at me, then said "Young man, I wish I were that banana." He walked away, and I almost blacked out choking on it in shock. FML

#21265897
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35724) - you deserved it (3648)

On 09/26/2014 at 4:40pm - misc - by Operation Yewtree here I come (man) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, I found out that the neighborhood call-girl my husband and I secretly joke about is the same woman who secretly pleasures my husband for money. FML

#21263093
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40792) - you deserved it (4761)

On 09/22/2014 at 12:43pm - intimacy - by mislead - United States (Louisiana)

Today, I was having sex with this amazingly hot guy. Things got pretty intense, and right as I was about to orgasm, the gold crucifix came flying off his necklace and sliced my eyelid open. Message received. Well played, God. FML

#21262317
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39925) - you deserved it (5621)

On 09/21/2014 at 7:27am - intimacy - by Sinnersinner - United States (California)

Today, I went on Facebook, only to see my grandpa had posted "feeling horny" with my grandma. FML

#21261512
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35987) - you deserved it (3372)

On 09/19/2014 at 10:27pm - misc - by failingdaily - New Zealand (Hawke's Bay)

Today, I found out that my wife of 12 years has slept with the workmen we've had working on our long term building project. They call her the "quickie queen". FML

#21226819
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54262) - you deserved it (3660)

On 08/01/2014 at 2:27pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Glasgow City)

Today, I spent six hours at the ER. Why? My husband dared our seventeen-year-old son to recreate a 'Jackass' trolley-hedge diving stunt at the local supermarket. What wasn't on my groceries list was a broken arm, fractured wrist, whiplash and cuts and bruises. FML

#21224521
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40844) - you deserved it (4656)

On 07/30/2014 at 4:21am - kids - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Bristol, City of)

Today, I accidentally farted in the middle of class. Thinking I got away with it, I just kept doing my work until some kid across the room says, "I could have done better." FML

#21224311
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34432) - you deserved it (5919)

On 07/29/2014 at 11:49pm - work - by dealtit - United States (Georgia)

Today, my cousin asked me what it's like to be so fat. I chastised him and said that was a rude thing to ask. He apologized, then asked me what it's like to be such a pussy. He didn't stop until he, a 10 year old kid, had reduced me, a 26 year old woman, to tears. FML

#21190580
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41730) - you deserved it (7468)

On 06/27/2014 at 5:57pm - kids - by keelah (woman) - United States (Alabama)

Today, the girl who broke up with me and disappeared 6 years ago wished me a happy Father's Day. FML

#21176638
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50949) - you deserved it (5806)

On 06/16/2014 at 11:30am - misc - by IneedMaury (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I was at Sea World and was about to take a picture of the big walrus. I noticed my phone was still set to use the front camera, and I muttered "Oops, selfie mode." A guy next to me turned, looked at me, and said "Not like there's a difference for you." FML

#21175629
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50100) - you deserved it (8404)

On 06/15/2014 at 4:01pm - animals - by furball (woman) - (Perth and Kinross)

Today, I was spinning some yarn around to make my new cat run in circles. After about 10 seconds, he stopped going in circles and went straight ahead, happily running several feet into the wall and knocking himself out. My bowel movements have more brain-power than this thing. FML

#21168476
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34957) - you deserved it (8502)

On 06/09/2014 at 5:45pm - animals - by jaqen h'garrrhghhgfgjhfuck (man) - France (Provence-Alpes-Cote d'Azur)

Today, I went to the restroom to pee. A loud fart exploded out of my ass and echoed in the toilet bowl. I could practically feel my face on fire when I saw the horrified look on a little girl's face as I walked out. FML

#21166563
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43162) - you deserved it (6109)

On 06/07/2014 at 10:34pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Colorado)



FML's blog

  • Cynthia's illustrated FML
  • TFIF indeed. It's time to kick off the suit and tie and forget about work. Some of us are going out for drinks with friends, others are going to enjoy some live music and some brave fools are going to keep fit…

Friday 28 November 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: