malait

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malait

18Fucked!

malaitmalait
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 4190
  • Number of comments : 29
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About malait : Dive instructor and law student, but my true talent is netflixing

malait's page activity

Visits<b>doubledutchy</b> - the 10/17/2016 at 5:06am<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 09/23/2016 at 1:42pm<b>HeatTransferFlow</b> - the 09/19/2016 at 7:16pm<b>roock87</b> - the 09/02/2016 at 5:37pm<b>Mons</b> - the 08/24/2016 at 4:36pm<b>clara_cl</b> - the 08/22/2016 at 8:12pm<b>bigbrown24</b> - the 08/16/2016 at 4:24pm<b>stryder9090</b> - the 08/16/2016 at 9:33am<b>SpartyOnWayne</b> - the 08/15/2016 at 5:03pm<b>tin_cup</b> - the 08/13/2016 at 12:25pm<b>spockadelic</b> - the 08/10/2016 at 8:56pm<b>ozzytiff</b> - the 08/10/2016 at 8:46pm<b>Capriciousfox</b> - the 08/09/2016 at 11:41pm<b>billboob</b> - the 08/09/2016 at 2:29pm<b>JadeOmega</b> - the 08/09/2016 at 2:20pm<b>sophie0908</b> - the 08/09/2016 at 6:05am<b>kokopuffs3</b> - the 08/09/2016 at 12:13am<b>1802ben</b> - the 08/09/2016 at 12:05am

Fucked!<b>stryder9090</b> - the 08/16/2016 at 3:33pm<b>doubledutchy</b> - the 08/16/2016 at 9:30am<b>Capriciousfox</b> - the 08/10/2016 at 5:42am<b>spockadelic</b> - the 08/09/2016 at 2:08am<b>newzealand</b> - the 08/08/2016 at 12:05pm<b>Mons</b> - the 08/08/2016 at 12:04pm<b>sdlr32787</b> - the 08/04/2016 at 4:40am<b>billboob</b> - the 08/04/2016 at 2:47am<b>StormfrontX33</b> - the 03/12/2016 at 2:01am<b>914smv</b> - the 02/28/2016 at 6:41am<b>tin_cup</b> - the 02/24/2016 at 6:32pm<b>karacakal2</b> - the 02/21/2016 at 5:51pm<b>moocowmilk0</b> - the 02/17/2016 at 12:10pm<b>tranced_</b> - the 02/17/2016 at 7:39am<b>Y0UI34574RD</b> - the 02/16/2016 at 10:44pm<b>S232Flash</b> - the 02/16/2016 at 9:58pm<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 01/05/2016 at 1:25am<b>Kamorka</b> - the 01/04/2016 at 12:25pm

malait's FML badges

The rules are the rules

Reading the comment rules is a really good idea. This badge is sponsored by our moderating team.

I never take things to heart

Having said that, my 3 comments on that FML were really worth it.

Perfectionist

Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.

See all of malait's badges

malait's favorite FMLs

Today, I got my driver's license. My dad made multiple copies of his insurance cards for me to give to people when I inevitably hit them. Because "Let's face it." FML

by JillianJuneBug / 05/16/2015 at 12:16pm / United States (Maine) / Miscellaneous

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I went to work at my job as a CNA at a long-term care facility. I'm also on a medication that has a side effect of confusion. I had 3 residents with Alzheimer's tell me to 'get my shit together.' FML

by Basically_ / 05/11/2015 at 5:24pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Work

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I emotionally confessed to the guy I like. His English isn't that good, so he asked me to repeat it several times. He ended up telling me no. FML

by ForeverAlone / 05/09/2015 at 11:53am / Korea, Republic of (Seoul-t'ukpyolsi) / Love

Today, I had a plan. I was going to get up early, eat a well balanced breakfast, put on my workout clothes and enjoy this beautiful day with a fulfilling jog. Instead, I put on my workout clothes, spent hours on social media, ate a pizza and ended up falling asleep on my coach. FML

by NevertheKool / 05/07/2015 at 5:43pm / United States (New Jersey) / Money

Today, I got a text from a guy I hooked up with. I'm not really interested in him, so I rushed out of his house last night. He was letting me know I left my wallet at his house, and if I want it, I'll have to let him take me to dinner. FML

by Anonymous / 05/06/2015 at 1:44pm / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, I went to the dentist for the first time in years. His first comment upon inspecting my teeth: "Meth. Hell of a drug." FML

by Anonymous / 04/18/2015 at 12:45pm / United States (California) / Health

Today, I was cuddling in bed with my boyfriend when he started squeezing me as if I were a ketchup bottle. He said he wanted my period to end quicker, and he honestly thought that would work. FML

by Keladrylady / 04/17/2015 at 8:47pm / New Zealand (Auckland) / Intimacy

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, when I dropped my 6-year-old daughter off at school, a little boy ran up to her so I asked his name. My daughter explained: "Oh, don't pay any attention to him, he's my slave. He's come to carry my bag. See you later, mom!" FML

by mafille / 03/18/2015 at 11:22pm / France / Kids

Today, I found out how much those tiny dogs cost when my German Shepherd ate one. FML

by brokeforever / 03/18/2015 at 6:23pm / Latvia (Riga) / Animals

Today, my ex-boyfriend asked me to homecoming, in front of the whole school, knowing I have social anxiety. I was forced to say yes to not seem like an asshole. Now I can't back out. FML

by TooMuchAnxiety / 03/10/2015 at 4:03am / United States (Hawaii) / Love

Today, I rolled up a newspaper and smashed a huge spider in my room. As I went to scoop it up with a tissue, it lurched away and fell near my bed. I can't find it, but I can sure as fuck sense the pure evil coming from it. Looks like I'll be sleeping on the couch tonight. FML

by farksh / 03/07/2015 at 7:14am / Australia / Animals

Today, I rolled up a newspaper and smashed a huge spider in my room. As I went to scoop it up with a tissue, it lurched away and fell near my bed. I can't find it, but I can sure as fuck sense the pure evil coming from it. Looks like I'll be sleeping on the couch tonight. FML

by farksh / 03/07/2015 at 7:14am / Australia / Animals

Today, while cleaning my son's room, I found an envelope labelled "PRIVATE AND CONFIDENTIAL" under his bed. I opened it, only to find it was a glitter bomb. I couldn't get it all cleaned off myself before he got home. He just said "HAH! Serves you right!" and went to his room smirking. FML

by Anonymous / 02/28/2015 at 1:11pm / United States (Oregon) / Kids

Today, my husband again lost his keys. It's a daily struggle to find them. This time they were in an ice cube, literally. He said he must have accidentally put them in there when making ice. He's going to be the father of my future children. FML

by wife / 02/21/2015 at 10:47pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I'm an intern working in a company's reception area, which happens to have a coffee dispenser. As I'm the new girl, every client getting coffee wants to buy me one. I'm too polite to say no. It's 10:26 AM, and I'm on cup #17. FML

by chloe_zjk / 02/18/2015 at 12:22am / France / Work