malait

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malait

10Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 3305
  • Number of comments : 25
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About malait : Engineer to be

malait's page activity

Visits<b>billboob</b> - the 03/13/2016 at 11:06am<b>StormfrontX33</b> - the 03/11/2016 at 8:01pm<b>doubledutchy</b> - the 03/09/2016 at 3:07am<b>914smv</b> - the 02/28/2016 at 12:41am<b>tin_cup</b> - the 02/24/2016 at 12:32pm<b>karacakal2</b> - the 02/21/2016 at 11:51am<b>sabby7</b> - the 02/19/2016 at 12:04am<b>moocowmilk0</b> - the 02/17/2016 at 11:14pm<b>Muthaschlucker</b> - the 02/17/2016 at 9:50pm<b>tranced_</b> - the 02/17/2016 at 3:56pm<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 02/17/2016 at 2:12pm<b>kaz55</b> - the 02/16/2016 at 10:47pm<b>ireply_wlyrics</b> - the 02/16/2016 at 5:41pm<b>Y0UI34574RD</b> - the 02/16/2016 at 4:44pm<b>S232Flash</b> - the 02/16/2016 at 3:58pm<b>JZY1989</b> - the 02/16/2016 at 2:47pm<b>Kamorka</b> - the 01/04/2016 at 6:25am<b>DeMamp</b> - the 12/26/2015 at 4:21am

Fucked!<b>StormfrontX33</b> - the 03/12/2016 at 2:01am<b>914smv</b> - the 02/28/2016 at 6:41am<b>tin_cup</b> - the 02/24/2016 at 6:32pm<b>karacakal2</b> - the 02/21/2016 at 5:51pm<b>moocowmilk0</b> - the 02/17/2016 at 12:10pm<b>tranced_</b> - the 02/17/2016 at 7:39am<b>Y0UI34574RD</b> - the 02/16/2016 at 10:44pm<b>S232Flash</b> - the 02/16/2016 at 9:58pm<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 01/05/2016 at 1:25am<b>Kamorka</b> - the 01/04/2016 at 12:25pm

malait's FML badges

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

See all of malait's badges

malait's favorite FMLs

Today, I was cuddling in bed with my boyfriend when he started squeezing me as if I were a ketchup bottle. He said he wanted my period to end quicker, and he honestly thought that would work. FML

by Keladrylady / 04/17/2015 at 8:47pm / New Zealand (Auckland) / Intimacy

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, when I dropped my 6-year-old daughter off at school, a little boy ran up to her so I asked his name. My daughter explained: "Oh, don't pay any attention to him, he's my slave. He's come to carry my bag. See you later, mom!" FML

by mafille / 03/18/2015 at 11:22pm / France / Kids

Today, I found out how much those tiny dogs cost when my German Shepherd ate one. FML

by brokeforever / 03/18/2015 at 6:23pm / Latvia (Riga) / Animals

Today, my ex-boyfriend asked me to homecoming, in front of the whole school, knowing I have social anxiety. I was forced to say yes to not seem like an asshole. Now I can't back out. FML

by TooMuchAnxiety / 03/10/2015 at 4:03am / United States (Hawaii) / Love

Today, I rolled up a newspaper and smashed a huge spider in my room. As I went to scoop it up with a tissue, it lurched away and fell near my bed. I can't find it, but I can sure as fuck sense the pure evil coming from it. Looks like I'll be sleeping on the couch tonight. FML

by farksh / 03/07/2015 at 7:14am / Australia / Animals

Today, I rolled up a newspaper and smashed a huge spider in my room. As I went to scoop it up with a tissue, it lurched away and fell near my bed. I can't find it, but I can sure as fuck sense the pure evil coming from it. Looks like I'll be sleeping on the couch tonight. FML

by farksh / 03/07/2015 at 7:14am / Australia / Animals

Today, while cleaning my son's room, I found an envelope labelled "PRIVATE AND CONFIDENTIAL" under his bed. I opened it, only to find it was a glitter bomb. I couldn't get it all cleaned off myself before he got home. He just said "HAH! Serves you right!" and went to his room smirking. FML

by Anonymous / 02/28/2015 at 1:11pm / United States (Oregon) / Kids

Today, my husband again lost his keys. It's a daily struggle to find them. This time they were in an ice cube, literally. He said he must have accidentally put them in there when making ice. He's going to be the father of my future children. FML

by wife / 02/21/2015 at 10:47pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I'm an intern working in a company's reception area, which happens to have a coffee dispenser. As I'm the new girl, every client getting coffee wants to buy me one. I'm too polite to say no. It's 10:26 AM, and I'm on cup #17. FML

by chloe_zjk / 02/18/2015 at 12:22am / France / Work

Today, at work, I sneezed so hard that I hit my head on my cash register. A second later, I heard roaring laughter from the security room, followed by someone saying to play it back. I'd almost convinced myself it wasn't about me, when one of the guys came out and gave me a thumb up. FML

by fxck / 02/04/2015 at 2:28pm / Work

Today, I found out that my 4-year-old son is truly convinced that I am a ghost. He also thinks that I died from burning, "because of your face". FML

by burned / 02/03/2015 at 3:45pm / Kids

Today, I felt a painful lump on my jaw. After going on Google, I was convinced I either had an infected tooth or jaw cancer. In a panic, I rushed to the dentist and told the receptionist the problem. She pulled the dentist from an appointment, and he felt around my jaw. It was just a pimple. FML

by not a cancerous pimple / 01/30/2015 at 7:11pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Health

Today, I realized my job working with food is getting to me. While having sex with my boyfriend, I fell asleep. He asked me what I was doing, and apparently I sleep-talked, saying "I'm chopping lettuce". FML

by xoragebaby / 01/23/2015 at 8:29pm / United States / Intimacy

Today, after the longest time, I went to the gym. I ran and ran and ran on the treadmill for an eternity, beating myself up for getting so overweight. Then I tripped and fell off, sweating and sobbing for being so useless. When I looked up, I saw I'd been on the machine for barely 2 minutes. FML

by Anonymous / 01/18/2015 at 11:34am / Ireland / Health

Today, at work, due to a mix up, I had to call an answering service. I am also from an answering service. We got the problem fixed but I couldn't hang up due to company policy. She couldn't hang up either. We both had to get our supervisors for permission to hang up. FML

by ring-a-ding-ding / 12/06/2014 at 12:18am / United States (Nevada) / Work