This member hasn't filled in their description.
maiden_girl's FML badges
Up and coming moderator
It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.
Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!
You have looked through 5 pages of the website. That’s a start.
maiden_girl's favorite FMLs
by Taylor / 01/20/2009 at 3:41pm / United States (Oklahoma) / Love
Today, I called up my ex girlfriend to ask her if I could come round hers to get my pyjamas back. She replied: "I'm keeping them just in case..." - "In case of what?" - "In case I want to dress up like an asshole". FML
Today, in the forest, I hit my foot against a half-buried metal thing. I dug into the ground, and found a beautiful box, heavy enough to not be empty. I imagined myself with gold coins. Inside was the corpse of a cat. FML
by Wenny / 01/18/2009 at 7:41am / United States (Connecticut) / Love
Today, I crashed into a ditch on my way home from work. I had to walk 2 miles in -25 below zero weather before I could pick up a cell phone signal to call a tow truck. When I got back to my car, a cop was waiting for me with a ticket for leaving the scene of an accident. FML
by dirk855 / 01/18/2009 at 5:29am / United States (Michigan) / Transportation
by Ohai / 01/16/2009 at 3:46pm / United States (Oklahoma) / Intimacy
by Noname / 01/16/2009 at 12:31pm / United Kingdom / Love
by Gob / 01/16/2009 at 9:36am / United States (Massachusetts) / Miscellaneous
by Camm. / 01/15/2009 at 6:32pm / United States (New York) / Love
by noname / 01/14/2009 at 1:33am / France (Languedoc-Roussillon) / Love
Today, my man and I were having sex on edge of bed. We were using chocolate spread and I was riding him. When we were done, he got up and I noticed a long brown line on the edge of the bed. I knelt down to smell it. It was NOT chocolate. FML
by Poopy / 01/12/2009 at 11:19am / United States (California) / Intimacy
by Christoams / 01/11/2009 at 11:35pm / Miscellaneous
Today, I came home from work. I crept up to the bedroom to gently wake up my girlfriend. I touch her shoulder and slowly leant in to give her a tender kiss. She suddenly wakes up and grabs me by the throat... I keep forgetting she's in the army. FML
- 1Today, I found out my parents have been slipping birth control pills into my morning orange juice… 2Today, I found out my husband has been catfishing my sixteen year-old brother for over a year. FML 3Today, I babysat a kid who was such a bratty little prick that I actually considered walking out on…
- Today, after shaking my boss's hand, I noticed that he had a piece of toilet paper stuck to one of… Today, I’m a student in China, and I attended a welcoming party for the new students. It consisted… Today, I sprayed pepper spray on a guy who appeared to be following me. He was really cute, and was…