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macone

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macone

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 196
  • Number of comments : 6
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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macone's page activity

Visits<b>KayDee29</b> - the 01/24/2016 at 2:12pm<b>ciaraash</b> - the 01/21/2016 at 4:40pm<b>walktowardslight</b> - the 12/16/2014 at 9:31am

macone's FML badges

Why am I up so early?

You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

See all of macone's badges

macone's favorite FMLs

Today, I came inside a girl's vagina by accident. Neither one of us wants her to be pregnant, and I had to spend half an hour with her sitting on my face, while I sucked my own cum out of her. I don't even know if this will work. FML

#21524955
188 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7356) - you deserved it (39028)

On 02/10/2016 at 9:12pm - intimacy - by nickncik (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, after my fiancé of seven years and the father of our four kids broke up with me, saying he slept with another girl but not to worry, he thought about me the whole time and still wants to marry me one day, it turns out he's moved to another state. FML

Today, while I was taking a shit, a guy went into the next stall and narrated what he was doing in song. I'm still traumatized by his lyrics. FML

#21522585
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19683) - you deserved it (1517)

On 02/03/2016 at 10:13pm - misc - by Lord_Nick (man) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I tried to be sexy by pulling down my girlfriend's panties with my teeth. I didn't expect to be faced with the mother of all shit stains and start gagging so bad I nearly puked. FML

#21522398
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25490) - you deserved it (3638)

On 02/03/2016 at 10:40am - intimacy - by :x (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I was taking a dump at work. I had my two-way radio attached to the back of my belt. When I stood up and pulled my pants up, I managed to send the antenna straight up my butt. FML

#21520186
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20094) - you deserved it (4400)

On 01/27/2016 at 7:29pm - misc - by poopsicle (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I woke up from an amazing dream I was having about my girlfriend. We were laughing and holding hands, the kind of dream I wanted to stay asleep for. When I finally got up, I was excited to tell her about the dream but then I remembered. We broke up a week ago. FML

#21516669
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22319) - you deserved it (1540)

On 01/18/2016 at 5:30pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, I lost my virginity to my boyfriend of 7 years. He thrusted as fast as rabbits. I waited years for 10 seconds. FML

#21514734
15 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22512) - you deserved it (5905)

On 01/13/2016 at 1:30pm - intimacy - by ShouldveStayedAVirgin - United States (Texas)

Today, my father contacted me for the first time in years to ask about my upcoming wedding and possibly walking me down the aisle. He claimed the only reason he left was because he thought I'd be gay. I am. FML

#21514376
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21297) - you deserved it (1898)

On 01/12/2016 at 4:03pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (Tennessee)

Today, this beautiful girl that I've known for a long time told me that she just can't date me anymore because I remind her too much of her cat. FML

#21511346
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20694) - you deserved it (1758)

On 01/04/2016 at 10:14am - love - by Anonymous - United States (Georgia)

Today, my husband and I were getting frisky. All was going well until I decided to go down on him, causing him to freak out, thinking I was going for his butt, ending the night with a black eye from being knee'd in the face. FML

#21511250
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21982) - you deserved it (2270)

On 01/04/2016 at 1:59am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend's dad came onto me. I was shocked and awkwardly tried to exit the situation. My boyfriend then sprang out and started shouting at me. Apparently, it was a "test" to see if I would still be attracted to him in 30 years. I failed. What. The. Fuck. FML

#21508382
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27813) - you deserved it (1650)

On 12/27/2015 at 12:31pm - love - by _schaden_freude - United Kingdom (Kent)

Today, I came home early to surprise my boyfriend. I walked into our bedroom to find him in dressed completely in my clothes, and in makeup. It took me a moment to realize it was him and not a female intruder. FML

#21503943
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23424) - you deserved it (2032)

On 12/15/2015 at 8:03am - misc - by ConfusedGirl (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, my wife knelt down in front me to give me a blowjob. As she took my underwear off a moth flew out of them. I've got no idea how it got there but I was cock-blocked by a moth. FML

#21503854
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26007) - you deserved it (5454)

On 12/14/2015 at 11:50pm - intimacy - by Moth_Balled (man) - Australia

Today, while working as a barista, a customer asked me for "gluten free milk". When I told her that most milk is gluten free, she flew into a fit of rage and cussed me out for being a "cheeky bitch". My manager then lectured me about not being "patronising" to customers. FML

#21502119
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21159) - you deserved it (2512)

On 12/10/2015 at 12:29am - work - by Anonymous - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, my cat regurgitated his food right on top of a heating vent located on my floor. Now the whole house smells like hot vomit. FML

#21501908
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21582) - you deserved it (1959)

On 12/09/2015 at 2:26pm - animals - by Jack W. - United States



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