This member hasn't filled in the description.
Why am I up so early?
You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.
Happy Ending
Brandon may have an FML, but he ended up marrying Jessica. You found this out by reading “FML, the follow up.”
Seen it!
You’ve watched 5 FML videos on the website, and commented on them.
Today, I was supervising some kids, who were playing on a bouncy castle. One of them managed to kick me in the face during a jump, and looking for an apology, I asked, "What do you say?" He paused, then shouted, "HEADSHOTTTTT!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (37618) - you deserved it (16779) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!
On 04/12/2013 at 8:14pm - kids - by xx-look-at-xx - France (Provence-Alpes-Cote d'Azur)
Today, I was violently throwing up due to severe morning sickness. My boyfriend looked at me, then turned and walked away. In the end, my daughter gave me some paper towel and her juice. My 18-month-old is more supportive of my pregnancy than her 30-year-old father. FML
I agree, your life sucks (32143) - you deserved it (4820)
On 03/27/2013 at 3:34pm - misc - by InfamousLastWord (woman) - United States
Today, I finally figured out why I've been getting diarrhea so often over the past six months. It only happens whenever I do something "sneaky". My body reacts strongly to how I stress over potentially getting caught. I'm a private investigator, and I apparently need a new career. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25706) - you deserved it (2804)
On 02/10/2013 at 5:41am - work - by screwed - United States
Today, my dream finally came true, I slept with the woman I love. Sadly, after that I got friend-zoned, because she's in love with my brother, and she wanted my help to get to him. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23932) - you deserved it (1930)
On 04/04/2012 at 12:41pm - love - by Sociallyawkwardpenguin (man) - Sent from mobile version
Today, I was yelled at for smoking at a bus stop, because a woman didn't appreciate me smoking by her children. She did this while waving her own lit cigarette in my face. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24987) - you deserved it (3391)
On 03/23/2012 at 11:34am - kids - by Confused (woman) - United Kingdom (London, City of)
Today, I watched as my step-dad put locks on my window, because he's convinced that I've been sneaking out at night. All my mom did was casually remark that I'm fucked if there's ever a fire. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22790) - you deserved it (2240)
On 03/18/2012 at 4:02pm - misc - by Rapunzel (woman) - United States (Arizona)
Today, I watched as my step-dad put locks on my window, because he's convinced that I've been sneaking out at night. All my mom did was casually remark that I'm fucked if there's ever a fire. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22790) - you deserved it (2240)
On 03/18/2012 at 4:02pm - misc - by Rapunzel (woman) - United States (Arizona)
Today, my fiancé and I decided to have a romantic rendezvous on the trampoline in our backyard. Or at least it was romantic, until I accidentally rolled off and all but crushed our dog. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8342) - you deserved it (10643)
On 03/18/2012 at 3:18pm - love - by Jacklyn - United States (Illinois)
Today, I called pizza hut to order a pizza. A voice recording was reading me their specials. The man had a horrible country accent so I began to make fun of it. Then I realized it was an actual person on the line. FML
I agree, your life sucks (4301) - you deserved it (29677)
On 03/15/2012 at 5:45am - misc - by muzikmaler91 - United States (Georgia)
Today, my dad sat me down for the sex talk. Almost before he could open his mouth, my mother popped her head into the room and said, "Be realistic, Dan. Who would want to sleep with that?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (28332) - you deserved it (1765)
On 03/14/2012 at 10:01pm - misc - by CallaC (man) - Canada (New Brunswick)
Today, my mother screamed and swore at me because I said I was looking to move out soon. Apparently, the idea of me moving out at 27 and her getting a job to pay her own way is devastating. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22511) - you deserved it (2214)
On 03/10/2012 at 6:37pm - misc - by whyme - United States (Arizona)
Today, I spat up blood and had horrible chest pain. My mom still made me go to school, claiming she needed to take the cat to the vet instead of me to the doctor. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22990) - you deserved it (1355)
On 03/07/2012 at 5:07pm - health - by Hungrytoothbrush (woman) - United States (Virginia)
Today, my stomach muscles are still sore from yesterday. Not because I was doing sit-ups or working out or anything, but because I have to work that hard to take a dump. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13836) - you deserved it (4039)
On 03/05/2012 at 12:12am - health - by wtbfiber (man) - United States
Today, my dad made me deliver a welcoming cake to our new neighbors. While I was making small-talk, I saw him climb over their backyard fence. A minute later, he climbed back over, with a plastic deck-chair in hand. I feel like an accessory to the pettiest theft in history. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17526) - you deserved it (1305)
On 03/02/2012 at 9:24pm - misc - by wtf dad (woman) - United States (North Carolina)
Today, I went to ask my boss for a raise. He laughed at me and said, "That's hilarious because I was going to ask you if you could take a pay cut!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (19562) - you deserved it (1305)
On 02/27/2012 at 10:41pm - work - by corey - United States
Monday 17 June 2013
The website: FML t-shirts -
Love - Animals - Money - Kids - Work - Health - Intimacy - Miscellaneous - Members
RSS feeds: 
Follow the FML 
Follow the FML blog Follow the FML comments
Go on the road: BlackBerry - Android - iPhone/iPod Touch - Windows Phone 7 - Mobile version
Give stuff to people: FML book - FML t-shirts
FML Everywhere: Français - Italiano - Español - Türk - Pусский - Svenskt - Indonesia
