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machiavelli2

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machiavelli2

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Thursday 6 October 1994 (19 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 130
  • Number of comments : 21
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About machiavelli2 : a simple engineer.

machiavelli2's page activity

Visits<b>pikawarriors</b> - the 05/04/2014 at 10:22pm<b>Rababco</b> - the 02/28/2014 at 2:51pm<b>billionair11</b> - the 02/06/2014 at 10:36pm<b>AstronautCreeper</b> - the 01/27/2014 at 10:40pm<b>Allthatiam</b> - the 01/19/2014 at 3:06am<b>goldenturtlez</b> - the 08/20/2013 at 5:48pm<b>georgemac</b> - the 08/05/2013 at 3:04am<b>lucilu89</b> - the 04/07/2013 at 4:58am<b>grogers311</b> - the 03/14/2013 at 11:55am<b>eusue</b> - the 02/22/2013 at 5:53pm<b>NinjaPegasus</b> - the 02/18/2013 at 1:50am<b>bushyyboy</b> - the 02/17/2013 at 8:57pm<b>Elgaard</b> - the 02/17/2013 at 4:21am<b>ghostmachine</b> - the 02/15/2013 at 9:14pm<b>alliewillie</b> - the 02/15/2013 at 8:05am<b>xxblmpknxx</b> - the 02/15/2013 at 6:53am<b>vina88</b> - the 02/15/2013 at 4:04am<b>hellaflushfa5</b> - the 02/15/2013 at 2:50am

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machiavelli2's favorite FMLs

Today, my department found out that we're getting a new supervisor for the third time this month. I joked about how we're like "the foster kid nobody wants." One of my coworkers burst into tears and ran off. I later found out that she had been a foster child and never once had a stable home. FML

#20550513
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32952) - you deserved it (26739)

On 03/19/2013 at 5:59am - work - by Luke - United States (New York)

Today, as always, I'm dating one of the few girls who, without fail, always finishes first when we get intimate. She's also one of those girlfriends who doesn't want to continue once she's done. FML

#20542189
192 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44921) - you deserved it (7417)

On 03/13/2013 at 3:51pm - intimacy - by WhyDoINeedAName - Canada (Alberta)

Today, a wasp knocked me out, broke my glasses, and left a gash over my eyebrow. It did so by flying under my glasses while I was playing my guitar, causing me to reflexively bat at it with the hand that was still grasping the guitar neck. FML

#20526426
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24260) - you deserved it (6567) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 02/28/2013 at 8:55pm - health - by JimiHendrix (man) - France (Provence-Alpes-Cote d'Azur)

Today, I was sitting on the chair-lift on a ski trip. There was a shift in gears and the metal in the seat began to vibrate. My dad, sister, and step-mom were all on the lift with me, not feeling a thing. It's terribly awkward to converse with your family while you involuntarily orgasm. FML

#20523671
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42692) - you deserved it (5387)

On 02/26/2013 at 10:00pm - intimacy - by Frostbitten (woman) - United States (Maine)

Today, a guy I went on one date with asked me out again via text. Being honest, I texted back, politely saying that he was a good guy but I wasn't really interested. He came over to my house, screaming about how awful I was for "text message breaking up with him" and then cracked my windshield. FML

#20522936
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35696) - you deserved it (4210)

On 02/26/2013 at 11:43am - love - by fuckedover - United States

Today, I was holding the door open for a friend. She told me to wait a second because she had to finish a text. Nearly a minute passed before I asked why she wouldn't come inside to finish typing. We were at a Chinese restaurant. She thought the "No MSG" sign meant you couldn't text inside. FML

#20519764
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31866) - you deserved it (3490)

On 02/24/2013 at 2:53am - misc - by cls_x (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I stole a pen from the doctor's office while she wasn't looking. Later on at work, I idly pulled the pen out during a meeting. My colleague looked at me, horrified. The pen had the words "minimally invasive gynecological surgery" emblazoned on it. I'm a man. FML

#20516811
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6889) - you deserved it (45242)

On 02/21/2013 at 9:56pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I lost a bet with my friends. I had to go to the super market and buy a copy of 50 Shades of Grey along with a cucumber. The cashier was trying so hard not to laugh while ringing me up. FML

#20516035
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39034) - you deserved it (10309)

On 02/21/2013 at 8:43am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Idaho)

Today, I felt frisky, so I did my hair and put on make-up and some lingerie. I walked into the living room, where my husband was playing a video game. He glanced up, said, "Oh, for fuck's sake." and made me wait nearly 15 minutes for him to reach a save-game point. FML

#20506870
271 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36148) - you deserved it (8065)

On 02/14/2013 at 6:00pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Staffordshire)

Today, I went to the market to buy some groceries. Before I got even half-way home, a guy stormed toward me, pulled what looked like a knife, and chased me around the block while screaming that he'd kill me for sleeping with his wife. Nope, still a 15-year-old virgin here. FML

#20506765
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34068) - you deserved it (2117)

On 02/14/2013 at 4:50pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Saudi Arabia (Ash Sharqiyah)

Today, my girlfriend bought herself a brand new iPad and iPod Touch, and returned my aging iPod and Kindle, which she constantly steals for her own use. She considers it my Valentine's Day present. FML

#20506625
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27415) - you deserved it (3266)

On 02/14/2013 at 3:23pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - Germany

Today, I had to use a public bathroom. I have problems going when other people are there, so I waited until everyone left. Two girls noticed I was taking a long time, and started giggling and throwing notes under the door asking if I was alive. This continued for half an hour. FML

#20505035
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27895) - you deserved it (5641)

On 02/13/2013 at 2:33pm - misc - by please leave... - United States (Texas)

Today, my boyfriend and I were visiting his parents. I'm nervous around them so he encouraged me to drink so I'd loosen up. I got so drunk I tore up all the things in his old room I thought were from ex-girlfriends and accidentally flashed his dad my crotch. FML

#20504494
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8707) - you deserved it (50193)

On 02/13/2013 at 12:07am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Kansas)

Today, a cute girl asked if my dog was available for a date on Valentine's Day. Thinking I was in luck, I asked if I should come along. She said no. My dog has better game than I do. FML

#20503854
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25901) - you deserved it (6159)

On 02/12/2013 at 4:50pm - animals - by Doggotmytongue - United States (Illinois)

Today, while walking on a nearly empty street, my friend dared me to slap a tall muscular chick on the butt and run away. I went and did it, but before I even had a chance to turn and run, she grabbed me, bent me over her knee and spanked me until I cried. My friend filmed it. FML

#20130842
186 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6961) - you deserved it (46483)

On 10/24/2012 at 1:53am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)



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