lvlcapblue

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lvlcapblue

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 3016
  • Number of comments : 24
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 11 posted

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lvlcapblue's page activity

Visits<b>DerSuldam</b> - the 04/06/2016 at 5:00pm<b>Oh_Bob_Saget</b> - the 11/14/2015 at 10:54pm<b>Princess_Eevee9</b> - the 09/02/2015 at 9:50pm<b>3051628</b> - the 04/02/2015 at 10:52am<b>Random4Dayz</b> - the 02/22/2015 at 10:41pm<b>jordanmicheala</b> - the 02/20/2015 at 11:31pm<b>kerstileann</b> - the 01/23/2015 at 3:57am<b>drureos</b> - the 12/19/2014 at 7:53pm<b>ilikeirony</b> - the 08/25/2014 at 12:24pm<b>I_Am_Melanie</b> - the 07/24/2014 at 10:53pm<b>CougeeSwagg</b> - the 07/24/2014 at 9:46am<b>jazmin3012</b> - the 07/03/2014 at 7:01pm<b>markcallanan_</b> - the 06/27/2014 at 6:52pm<b>AHotCupOfCoffee</b> - the 06/18/2014 at 2:52pm<b>jonjonguapito</b> - the 03/15/2014 at 3:34pm<b>tigerfish</b> - the 02/20/2014 at 9:23pm<b>Demonking</b> - the 02/10/2014 at 7:43am<b>camsaltysquares</b> - the 01/26/2014 at 4:28am

lvlcapblue's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

lvlcapblue's favorite FMLs

Today, while bitching some girl out for spilling coffee all over me, she looks at me with accepting eyes and says after I'd finished, "I can understand your anger, big girls like you get grumpy when they're hungry." FML

by Anonymous / 08/28/2011 at 5:41pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, my son was eating a plum. I was busy in the kitchen, and he came running in saying "Mummy my plum is wet", I told him it was fine and bit a bit off to prove it. He looked at me and said "No Mummy! Can you wash it please, I dropped it in my potty". I feel ill. FML

by cjay2200 / 08/28/2011 at 5:25pm / United Kingdom (Lincolnshire) / Kids

Today, I was installing updates on my 16 year old daughter's laptop, when I got the urge to snoop around. I found a 5,000 word sex story involving her and the Edward and Jacob weirdos from the Twilight movies. I can't even look her in the eyes. I can't believe I raised this freak. FML

by f*ckingdisgusted / 08/26/2011 at 9:13pm / United States / Kids

Today, I had to take my dog to the vet for him to be put to sleep. I could feel the cold, hard shaft of irony slide its way up my ass and slowly fuck me senseless with every step I took on this beautiful National Dog Day. FML

by Anonymous / 08/26/2011 at 1:49pm / United States / Animals

Today, I started my new job as a teacher. Worried about how I looked, I asked a coworker if I looked okay. She said, "You look fine. Just like a normal high school kid." I spent the next half hour convincing her that I was not a student, but a teacher. FML

by Meagan smith / 08/24/2011 at 4:33pm / United States (Colorado) / Work

Today, I work by myself at a retail store and I was bored so I called my boyfriend. I woke him up and he was feeling frisky, and as things were getting heated I started to moan and say dirty things. Until the entire rack of clothes fell over and revealed my boss hiding. He had a boner. FML

by MissCan'tKeepAJob / 08/23/2011 at 12:18pm / United States (Texas) / Intimacy

Today, I asked my two children why they smelled like pee after we had gotten lunch at McDonald's. They told me that they were playing in the puddles in the play-place. FML

by Username / 08/23/2011 at 11:55am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Kids

Today, while at the grocery store an elderly woman farted very loudly next to me. Everyone in the aisle looked our way. The woman pointed at me, and left the aisle. I received many disgusted looks from children and their parents. FML

by kykynevs / 08/23/2011 at 3:14am / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous

Today, my 4 year old asked to go outside and play in the sprinkler. I told him not right now because I was busy and he's too little to play outside by himself. I came out of the laundry room later to find he'd brought the sprinkler in the house and turned the water on. At least he listened. FML

by Anonymous / 08/20/2011 at 10:08am / United States / Kids

Today, my girlfriend sexted me for the first time in months. Half way through reading it I was getting kind of hot. Then I found a spelling mistake and all I could think to do was correct her. She won't talk to me. FML

by KiDCuSHi / 08/20/2011 at 12:58am / Canada (Ontario) / Intimacy

Today, my mom went to grab my sheets off my bed. I said that I would do it, to which she responded, "Calm down, it's not like I've never seen 'spludge' before." FML

by Anonymous / 08/17/2011 at 9:51pm / United States / Intimacy

Today, I had a cop pull me over because he claimed that he saw me taking a bunch of colorful pills at the previous stop sign. I was eating skittles. FML

by candymansvan17 / 08/17/2011 at 5:50pm / United States (Oklahoma) / Miscellaneous

Today, my friend and I went for a late night walk along the beach. We decided to sit down on a log. It was a dead seal. FML

by squishylog / 08/12/2011 at 3:44am / United States (California) / Animals

Today, since I'm too ashamed to go buy a proper sex toy, I used an old Star Wars toy sword instead. FML

by Anonymous / 08/11/2011 at 1:53am / Mexico (Distrito Federal) / Intimacy

Today, I discovered the reason my favorite stick of deodorant hasn't smelled right for the past two weeks. My dad uses it on his butt crack and balls "to clean up the stank". FML

by Anonymous / 08/08/2011 at 3:16am / United States (Massachusetts) / Intimacy