lvlcapblue

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lvlcapblue

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 3236
  • Number of comments : 24
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 11 posted

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lvlcapblue's page activity

Visits<b>DerSuldam</b> - the 04/06/2016 at 5:00pm<b>Oh_Bob_Saget</b> - the 11/14/2015 at 10:54pm<b>Princess_Eevee9</b> - the 09/02/2015 at 9:50pm<b>3051628</b> - the 04/02/2015 at 10:52am<b>Random4Dayz</b> - the 02/22/2015 at 10:41pm<b>jordanmicheala</b> - the 02/20/2015 at 11:31pm<b>kerstileann</b> - the 01/23/2015 at 3:57am<b>drureos</b> - the 12/19/2014 at 7:53pm<b>ilikeirony</b> - the 08/25/2014 at 12:24pm<b>I_Am_Melanie</b> - the 07/24/2014 at 10:53pm<b>CougeeSwagg</b> - the 07/24/2014 at 9:46am<b>jazmin3012</b> - the 07/03/2014 at 7:01pm<b>markcallanan_</b> - the 06/27/2014 at 6:52pm<b>AHotCupOfCoffee</b> - the 06/18/2014 at 2:52pm<b>jonjonguapito</b> - the 03/15/2014 at 3:34pm<b>tigerfish</b> - the 02/20/2014 at 9:23pm<b>Demonking</b> - the 02/10/2014 at 7:43am<b>camsaltysquares</b> - the 01/26/2014 at 4:28am

lvlcapblue's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

lvlcapblue's favorite FMLs

Today, I was washing my hands in the bathroom when I looked up and saw a spider on my cheek. Panicking, I slapped myself in the face as hard as I could to kill it. Turns out the spider was on the mirror. FML

by Anonymous / 10/18/2011 at 2:55am / United States (Missouri) / Animals

Today, as part of the treatment for my bulimia, my doctor informed me that I will not be allowed to go to the bathroom unsupervised. Meaning there will have to be another person in the bathroom with me at all times. I have a nervous bladder. I couldn't go if I wanted to. FML

by Anonymous / 10/13/2011 at 8:07pm / United States (New Hampshire) / Health

Today, my dad took my phone away. This would be fine if I was 14. I'm 22 and pay for all of my own bills. FML

by Anonymous / 10/13/2011 at 7:25pm / United States (Nevada) / Miscellaneous

Today, my brother in law got into a fight with my husband. My pregnant sister was yelling at her husband to stop beating my husband up. When I came into the room, I asked why they were fighting. You'll never guess who the real father of my sister's baby is. FML

by Good sister / 10/13/2011 at 7:20pm / United States (Georgia) / Love

Today, I was late for work. Trying to cut a few seconds off the clock, I tried to open my breakfast candy bar while taking a piss. I ended up pissing all over myself and dropping the bar in the toilet. FML

by Massasam / 10/11/2011 at 4:53pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I walked in on my flatmate squatting over the bathroom scales, completely naked. When I asked what he was doing, he replied very seriously, "weighing my testicles, you should try it sometime, if they're too heavy you may have cancer". I'm a girl. FML

by Anonymous / 10/10/2011 at 4:29am / Reserved / Health

Today, while I was waiting in line at McDonalds, I found out I can sneeze, pee, and poop all at the same time. FML

by Anonymous / 10/08/2011 at 12:00pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, my car got acquainted with about 3 dozen eggs. FML

by Anonymous / 10/06/2011 at 11:21pm / United States / Transportation

Today, I was asked if my bellybutton was an 'innie' or an 'outtie.' My bellybutton has been hidden by fat for so long that I couldn't remember. FML

by knzknz / 10/06/2011 at 8:40pm / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous

Today, I told my boyfriend I had an appointment for laser hair removal. He responded by making "pew pew" noises and pretending to shoot my underarms. He's 28. FML

by pixiebubz / 10/05/2011 at 11:59pm / Australia / Health

Today, I got a text from someone I've been avoiding saying, "Can I come visit you today?" I replied, "No, sorry, I'm not home." They then replied "Then who is that in your living room?" FML

by Pookaa / 10/05/2011 at 7:48pm / United States (Maine) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was playing video games at 2am. My guinea pig started squealing at me, and wouldn't stop until I turned out the lights and got into bed. I'm 20 years old, and I've let a rodent dictate my bedtime. FML

by Beeisc00l / 10/05/2011 at 2:58pm / Reserved / Animals

Today, after a long bike-ride home, I thought my roommate was being a douche and holding the door shut to our apartment. After about ten minutes of shoulder-slamming and name calling, I discovered that I just wasn't turning the key all the way, which I found out when my roomie came home. FML

by nooooooooob / 10/05/2011 at 4:59am / United States (Nevada) / Miscellaneous

Today, on my way home, my girlfriend started sexting me, telling me that she was waiting at my house. In my rush to get home to see her, I got pulled over and had to be patted down. He found no weapons, but he did find my stiffy. FML

by Username / 10/04/2011 at 8:02pm / United States / Intimacy

Today, my boyfriend got drunk and tried to french-kiss my dog. Now he has 12 stitches in his face, and he's insisting we have to get my dog put down. FML

by Anonymous / 10/04/2011 at 12:03pm / United States (Wisconsin) / Animals