About lucky22888 : I love creampies!!! No seriously though I just love to joke around and have fun!!! Life is too short.
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Today, I found out the hard way that you can get carpal tunnel from masturbating. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9400) - you deserved it (27355)
On 02/27/2011 at 8:36pm - intimacy - by Nuttjacob (man) - United States (Vermont)
Today, I got a call from my daughter’s teacher asking me to come pick her up. My daughter wouldn’t tell her what was wrong. I left an important work meeting. When I got there she stated her boyfriend broke up with her and she couldn't emotionally make it through the rest of the day. She's 5. FML
I agree, your life sucks (45147) - you deserved it (5736)
On 02/08/2011 at 12:46pm - kids - by mom21 - United States (Wisconsin)
Today, I flirted with a guy for ten minutes before realizing I was sitting between him and his girlfriend. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8729) - you deserved it (28230)
On 02/07/2011 at 12:41pm - love - by Lindsay (woman) - United States (Missouri)
Today, I found out my husband is sleeping with my best friend. The best part? We all just signed a 12 month essentially non-breakable lease on a house together. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29476) - you deserved it (3472)
On 02/06/2011 at 10:18pm - intimacy - by cllutz (woman) - United States (Arizona)
Today, my 400 pound roommate brought home a 400 pound guy. Now there's 800 pounds of sex going on in the next room, and it sounds like the invasion of Normandy in there. FML
I agree, your life sucks (59857) - you deserved it (5174)
On 02/04/2011 at 12:42am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Virginia)
Today, in gym class, we were forced to learn the "Hoedown Throwdown" dance, by Miley Cyrus. This will actually be counted toward my grade. I'm in high school. FML
I agree, your life sucks (32161) - you deserved it (3557)
On 01/06/2011 at 5:57pm - misc - by UltraHoe69 - United States
Today, my boyfriend decided to re-enact a scene from Family Guy. He locked me in the car with him and farted deadly ones repeatedly. He wouldn't let me out until I learned to "love the gas." FML
I agree, your life sucks (31803) - you deserved it (6158)
On 01/04/2011 at 3:09pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Reserved
Today, I was about to kiss my girlfriend right as the clock struck midnight for New Year's. She put her hand in front of my mouth, and broke up with me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (37591) - you deserved it (2473)
On 01/01/2011 at 12:19am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Georgia)
Today, I looked deep into my wife's eyes and told her how much I loved her and how much she meant to me. Her reply was "Clean your glasses." FML
I agree, your life sucks (21837) - you deserved it (2921)
On 12/21/2010 at 12:25pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom
Today, my boyfriend and I were playing around. He threw me over his shoulder and turned around, smacking my face against the wall. Then he smacked my head into the fridge after turning round to see "what that loud bang" was. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27480) - you deserved it (3058)
On 12/18/2010 at 4:11am - love - by anonymous - United States (South Carolina)
Today, I realized the nicest thing my fiancé has said to me all month was that I have "very suckable titties." FML
I agree, your life sucks (19508) - you deserved it (3966)
On 11/11/2010 at 8:48pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I texted my ex boyfriend that I still loved him. He texted back asking if this was some sort of booty call. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8102) - you deserved it (24195)
Today, I realized that the full body wax I got two weeks ago that my wife told me would look sexy doesn't just make me look like a completely hairless ten-year-old boy. The ingrown hairs everywhere now make me look like someone with chicken pox. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16211) - you deserved it (5021)
On 10/14/2010 at 9:05am - health - by mikey - United States (Michigan)
Today, I came home from a four day trip. Apparently, my cat thought I was gone for good and is now very unhappy that I'm home. I know this because she has been positioning herself between me and my husband all night, and hisses every time I try to touch him. He thinks it's hilarious. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22585) - you deserved it (3620)
On 10/11/2010 at 12:34am - love - by JLD - United States (Georgia)
Today, while on my run, I was attacked by my neighbor's new dog. It apparently didn't like me running past their house and broke free from its chain. I now have stitches and was just told that I'm probably being taken to court for the emotional distress I caused her and the dog. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26483) - you deserved it (1710)
On 10/10/2010 at 8:57pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Missouri)
Monday 20 May 2013
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