Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

lolly_bags

Offline (yesterday at 11:52am) | Search for a member

lolly_bags

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 4170
  • Number of comments : 1
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

lolly_bags's page activity

Visits<b>Cautocracy</b> - the 03/15/2015 at 5:46am<b>dicroda</b> - the 05/29/2014 at 7:42pm<b>LeeB</b> - the 04/04/2014 at 2:25pm<b>Hannahbunzbabyz</b> - the 11/24/2013 at 10:28pm<b>tea_brewer</b> - the 09/07/2013 at 8:33pm<b>chargers2588</b> - the 09/05/2013 at 3:00pm<b>Zoeythedinosaur</b> - the 08/21/2013 at 7:38am<b>ifhydomo23</b> - the 07/24/2013 at 10:16pm<b>ZombieGuyCXV</b> - the 07/24/2013 at 6:26pm<b>jackson38</b> - the 05/17/2013 at 1:15am<b>LaLince</b> - the 04/30/2013 at 11:20pm<b>aleqsbro</b> - the 04/30/2013 at 4:15pm<b>Sonfang</b> - the 04/23/2013 at 8:57am<b>WOWcats</b> - the 04/12/2013 at 10:23am<b>CloudEnvy</b> - the 04/06/2013 at 7:14am<b>umyeahh</b> - the 03/08/2013 at 7:51pm<b>JustAGirlOnFML</b> - the 01/13/2013 at 1:32pm

lolly_bags's FML badges

Inception

You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of lolly_bags's badges

lolly_bags's favorite FMLs

Today, I found out that if you wake your 7-year old sister up by plugging her nose, you'll wake up the next morning, taped down and unable to move as she pours ice water on you. FML

Today, I was doing a design sketch for work. I snapped a pic and sent it to my boss. She replied, "Impressive. Nice sketch too." I was drawing at home, naked. My dick was in the picture. FML

Today, my mom and dad played rock, paper, scissors over who gets to spend the night with me in the hospital tonight while I have surgery. FML

#21209860
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47696) - you deserved it (4008)

On 07/15/2014 at 4:11pm - health - by smh (woman) - United States

Today, my dad finished installing our new home security system. One of the features lets him control any light in the house from his phone. He keeps trying to piss me off by turning my bedroom light on at random intervals. I don't know how to make it stop, and I can't sleep. FML

#21196465
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47364) - you deserved it (4569)

On 07/02/2014 at 5:52pm - misc - by pissed off (man) - United Kingdom (Milton Keynes)

Today, I took my driving test. It was all going well until out of habit from driving with my boyfriend, I reached over and held my instructor's hand. FML

#21154900
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43519) - you deserved it (16235)

On 05/28/2014 at 5:12pm - misc - by chevygirl51 - United States

Today, I saw the hottest nurse ever. Too bad he was pulling out a piece of wax the size of a raisin from my blocked ear. FML

#21154073
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41645) - you deserved it (7627)

On 05/27/2014 at 11:23pm - health - by idk - United States (Virginia)

Today, I took my driving test. I had pulled out of my three point turn in a neighborhood and started driving again, thinking something wasn't quite right. The lady testing me looked over at me and said, "Sweetie, you're driving on the wrong side of the road." FML

#21150097
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39158) - you deserved it (19032)

On 05/24/2014 at 11:22am - misc - by Lindsey (woman) - United States

Today, while at work as a telemarketer, I called a customer on his home phone. Once I was connected, an automated voice said, "To speak with a customer, please press 1." Confused, I pressed one. I then heard loud laughter followed by, "Oh my god! What a dumbass!" before they hung up. FML

#21133762
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38876) - you deserved it (20801)

On 05/07/2014 at 11:57pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my little brother put a battery to my tongue while I was sleeping with my mouth open. The shock found its way right to my metal filling. FML

#21123309
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42916) - you deserved it (3706)

On 04/26/2014 at 7:36am - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Georgia)

Today, I met up with an old friend of mine who acts in a TV show. I hadn't seen him in a long time, but I'd been watching episodes of the show almost daily, so when he showed up I could only see him as his TV character and not as my friend. I ended up calling him by his character's name. FML

#21114249
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40260) - you deserved it (13102)

On 04/16/2014 at 12:13am - misc - by Confused (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my house was robbed. My two 70-pound German Shepherds obeyed me when I told them to attack. They also obeyed the robber when he said, "Sit". FML

#21113538
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54323) - you deserved it (4924)

On 04/15/2014 at 8:08am - animals - by stupiddog (man) - United States (California)

Today, I called my mom to ask for some help with my dishwasher. Somehow, the call got turned into a video call. I was wearing a bathrobe, and she was naked in her bathroom. Most awkward call ever. FML

#21105694
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37899) - you deserved it (4560)

On 04/06/2014 at 2:57am - misc - by FaceTime issues - United States (Arizona)

Today, I was randomly selected for a pat-down while at the airport. Being from the south, I said thanks out of pure habit. The guy replied, "No sir, thank YOU." and winked. FML

#21098671
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38056) - you deserved it (4870)

On 03/28/2014 at 4:30pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I was at Walmart and had to use the bathroom. I sat down and farted real loud. I didn't realize someone was in there with me until I heard a voice say, "Dude, that was a good one." It was a man's voice. I then realized I was in the men's restroom. FML

#21095689
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48108) - you deserved it (12245)

On 03/24/2014 at 11:39pm - misc - by dani (woman) - United States (Ohio)



Sophie Marie's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • OK jkjk it was FMLS April Fools
  •   Yah its know over, ive stoppd wrotting… Sorry, I'll try again. There, it's over, I can stop typing TXT language with my forehead. Yes, you probably cottened on that it was our little…

Monday 30 March 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: