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lolfood

Offline (the 07/22/2015 at 1:46am) | Search for a member

lolfood

3Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Saturday 31 January 1998 (17 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 4845
  • Number of comments : 419
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 59 posted

About lolfood : Welcome to my profile.




















































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... Why are you still here?

lolfood's page activity

Visits<b>EnJey0</b> - the 07/18/2015 at 3:50pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 07/13/2015 at 12:43pm<b>rachelthelime</b> - the 06/28/2015 at 5:31pm<b>kerripjones</b> - the 06/09/2015 at 10:51pm<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - the 06/03/2015 at 10:38pm<b>ionab101</b> - the 05/21/2015 at 7:50pm<b>raven83</b> - the 05/20/2015 at 9:35am<b>MaybeMoo</b> - the 04/13/2015 at 5:08pm<b>plastix</b> - the 04/11/2015 at 1:35pm<b>meladuh</b> - the 04/11/2015 at 8:19am<b>kristergirl</b> - the 04/11/2015 at 3:38am<b>skiddymarker</b> - the 04/04/2015 at 12:42am<b>ThatOtherMegan</b> - the 04/02/2015 at 7:19am<b>DovahShep</b> - the 04/01/2015 at 9:43pm<b>Demonface54</b> - the 03/31/2015 at 5:02pm<b>hodgepodge365</b> - the 03/28/2015 at 8:07pm<b>justingug76</b> - the 03/28/2015 at 7:08pm<b>Epickitty58</b> - the 03/28/2015 at 12:57pm

Fucked!<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 07/13/2015 at 6:43pm<b>rachelthelime</b> - the 06/28/2015 at 11:31pm<b>HyunnK</b> - the 01/30/2015 at 11:57pm

lolfood's FML badges

Inception

You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

See all of lolfood's badges

lolfood's favorite FMLs

Today, I was so broke and hungry that I went to Olive Garden and faked being stood up, just so I could eat their breadsticks. FML

#19101207
221 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36374) - you deserved it (5603)

On 02/17/2012 at 4:10pm - misc - by 97 (woman) - United States

Today, I received a cute letter in my locker. It was in German, so I used Google translate. Apparently, someone hopes I choke on big fat cock. FML

#19078471
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28549) - you deserved it (3060)

On 02/14/2012 at 7:35pm - intimacy - by kittens go meow - United States (Georgia)

Today, I took my girlfriend out for a fancy dinner to celebrate our anniversary. When the waitress came, we instantly recognized each other. She was the girl I'd had a one night stand with a few weeks before. FML

#19066381
438 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10507) - you deserved it (122387)

On 02/13/2012 at 4:49pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - Canada

Today, my misanthropic malcontent of a son smashed my air freshener and turned my faulty lava lamp on in a twisted act of rebellion. The bottom of the lamp broke and got wax everywhere. My room now smells like cinnamon, with a hint of freshly embalmed corpse. FML

#19066178
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23199) - you deserved it (4450)

On 02/13/2012 at 4:31pm - kids - by Username - India

Today, I was talking to a friend about how many germs live on the average cell phone. My five year old son apparently overheard me talking, and decided to give my cell phone a bath. FML

#19066123
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25829) - you deserved it (5935)

On 02/13/2012 at 4:23pm - kids - by Katherine - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, I sat in my boss' office as he bitched me out for being "too sarcastic" to our customers. After nearly half an hour of him criticizing my "piss-poor attitude," he asked me what I was going to do to fix it. Without thinking, I said, "Your mom." Now I'm jobless again. FML

#19042299
202 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9399) - you deserved it (69260)

On 02/10/2012 at 4:33pm - work - by great - United States

Today, I received a single, hand-made Valentine's card from the weirdest kid in the school. It said, "If you ever get mauled by a bear, I hope he doesn't damage your face." FML

#18988741
227 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27348) - you deserved it (5172)

On 02/04/2012 at 12:12am - love - by Jayde - United States (Texas)

Today, our school chorus went to a senior citizens' home. An elderly lady died during my solo. FML

#18964784
187 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43589) - you deserved it (3813)

On 01/31/2012 at 10:34pm - misc - by sorrygrandma - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I realized the closest thing I've had to an intimate relationship with a female is the one I have with my cat. Even then, she ignores me. FML

#18943699
186 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24711) - you deserved it (5407)

On 01/29/2012 at 2:55pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, I got to listen while my grandma, who has dementia and therefore a poor memory, explained to me why the old man on TV was a sex god. She forgot everything once she said it. I got to listen to her explanation five times over. FML

#18942178
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23584) - you deserved it (2279)

On 01/29/2012 at 11:23am - misc - by scared for life (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I turned on the news to see a live report about an increase in crime in my town. One minute in, my drunk daughter appears behind the news reporter, butt naked, dancing. FML

#18845928
170 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40517) - you deserved it (6358)

On 01/18/2012 at 5:30pm - misc - by MakesMeLol (man) - Ireland (Dublin)

Today, I sold my Xbox and Kinect to a guy. I forgot that sometimes I'd play Dance Central naked, and the Kinect would make videos. This guy now has videos of me, naked, badly dancing. FML

#18791715
221 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12872) - you deserved it (46834)

On 01/13/2012 at 12:05am - misc - by anonymous (man) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my toaster scared me. Again. FML

#18784375
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14324) - you deserved it (24644)

On 01/12/2012 at 11:33am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Armagh)

Today, I was cooking with super hot ghost peppers. The package said "After handling them not to touch your eyes, nose or pets". They should've added "penis" to that list. FML

#18729935
359 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12804) - you deserved it (57873)

On 01/06/2012 at 9:22pm - health - by Anonymous - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I had an upset stomach. I lay down in bed with a bucket nearby just in case. Later on, the urge to vomit overcame me, and I puked into the bucket. I realised too late that my cat had chosen to sleep in it. He jumped out and spread vomit all over my apartment. FML

#18716901
206 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37577) - you deserved it (4955) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/05/2012 at 3:40pm - animals - by Fat_abott - France



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