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lolfood

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lolfood

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 2704
  • Number of comments : 414
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 58 posted

About lolfood : Welcome to my profile.




















































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... Why are you still here?

lolfood's page activity

Visits<b>BirdieCurls</b> - the 09/18/2014 at 6:42pm<b>CareFreeBanana</b> - the 09/09/2014 at 7:05am<b>dying_to_know</b> - the 09/04/2014 at 5:39pm<b>Global_User</b> - the 08/27/2014 at 2:31pm<b>awesomepantTamia</b> - the 08/17/2014 at 6:37pm<b>Maria_BVB_Army</b> - the 08/17/2014 at 2:08am<b>Tl471</b> - the 07/13/2014 at 8:49am<b>CubanBitchh</b> - the 07/08/2014 at 12:21am<b>thatcrazygiirl</b> - the 07/06/2014 at 2:27pm<b>trinalporpus</b> - the 06/25/2014 at 8:46pm<b>Wingman527</b> - the 06/23/2014 at 11:21pm<b>AHotCupOfCoffee</b> - the 06/23/2014 at 3:26pm<b>cheesybanana703</b> - the 06/02/2014 at 9:10am<b>mossbeg410</b> - the 05/23/2014 at 10:29pm<b>Death_The_Kid15</b> - the 05/22/2014 at 10:29pm<b>44LynnLynn</b> - the 05/22/2014 at 6:09am<b>hotbutthurttoast</b> - the 05/11/2014 at 9:21am<b>tuckit</b> - the 05/09/2014 at 1:31pm

lolfood's FML badges

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

Happy Ending

Brandon may have an FML, but he ended up marrying Jessica. You found this out by reading “FML, the follow up.”

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of lolfood's badges

lolfood's favorite FMLs

Today, I was speaking to an old friend and I asked her how her mother was. She replied, "She passed away, you came to her funeral last month." FML

#19121013
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8361) - you deserved it (40364)

On 02/20/2012 at 5:01am - misc - by elizabethyeo - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, I was so broke and hungry that I went to Olive Garden and faked being stood up, just so I could eat their breadsticks. FML

#19101207
218 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35229) - you deserved it (5464)

On 02/17/2012 at 4:10pm - misc - by 97 (woman) - United States

Today, I received a cute letter in my locker. It was in German, so I used Google translate. Apparently, someone hopes I choke on big fat cock. FML

#19078471
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28244) - you deserved it (3039)

On 02/14/2012 at 7:35pm - intimacy - by kittens go meow - United States (Georgia)

Today, I took my girlfriend out for a fancy dinner to celebrate our anniversary. When the waitress came, we instantly recognized each other. She was the girl I'd had a one night stand with a few weeks before. FML

#19066381
434 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9384) - you deserved it (114155)

On 02/13/2012 at 4:49pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - Canada

Today, my misanthropic malcontent of a son smashed my air freshener and turned my faulty lava lamp on in a twisted act of rebellion. The bottom of the lamp broke and got wax everywhere. My room now smells like cinnamon, with a hint of freshly embalmed corpse. FML

#19066178
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20604) - you deserved it (4150)

On 02/13/2012 at 4:31pm - kids - by Username - India

Today, I was talking to a friend about how many germs live on the average cell phone. My five year old son apparently overheard me talking, and decided to give my cell phone a bath. FML

#19066123
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24651) - you deserved it (5768)

On 02/13/2012 at 4:23pm - kids - by Katherine - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, I sat in my boss' office as he bitched me out for being "too sarcastic" to our customers. After nearly half an hour of him criticizing my "piss-poor attitude," he asked me what I was going to do to fix it. Without thinking, I said, "Your mom." Now I'm jobless again. FML

#19042299
200 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8573) - you deserved it (65264)

On 02/10/2012 at 4:33pm - work - by great - United States

Today, I received a single, hand-made Valentine's card from the weirdest kid in the school. It said, "If you ever get mauled by a bear, I hope he doesn't damage your face." FML

#18988741
225 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25811) - you deserved it (5016)

On 02/04/2012 at 12:12am - love - by Jayde - United States (Texas)

Today, our school chorus went to a senior citizens' home. An elderly lady died during my solo. FML

#18964784
185 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42390) - you deserved it (3720)

On 01/31/2012 at 10:34pm - misc - by sorrygrandma - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I realized the closest thing I've had to an intimate relationship with a female is the one I have with my cat. Even then, she ignores me. FML

#18943699
182 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22457) - you deserved it (5093)

On 01/29/2012 at 2:55pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, I got to listen while my grandma, who has dementia and therefore a poor memory, explained to me why the old man on TV was a sex god. She forgot everything once she said it. I got to listen to her explanation five times over. FML

#18942178
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21935) - you deserved it (2143)

On 01/29/2012 at 11:23am - misc - by scared for life (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I turned on the news to see a live report about an increase in crime in my town. One minute in, my drunk daughter appears behind the news reporter, butt naked, dancing. FML

#18845928
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37843) - you deserved it (6079)

On 01/18/2012 at 5:30pm - misc - by MakesMeLol (man) - Ireland (Dublin)

Today, I sold my Xbox and Kinect to a guy. I forgot that sometimes I'd play Dance Central naked, and the Kinect would make videos. This guy now has videos of me, naked, badly dancing. FML

#18791715
219 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12741) - you deserved it (46516)

On 01/13/2012 at 12:05am - misc - by anonymous (man) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my toaster scared me. Again. FML

#18784375
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14068) - you deserved it (24264)

On 01/12/2012 at 11:33am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Armagh)

Today, I was cooking with super hot ghost peppers. The package said "After handling them not to touch your eyes, nose or pets". They should've added "penis" to that list. FML

#18729935
357 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11965) - you deserved it (55319)

On 01/06/2012 at 9:22pm - health - by Anonymous - United States (Massachusetts)



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