Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

lmbachman

Online | Search for a member

lmbachman

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 1767
  • Number of comments : 117
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 21 posted

About lmbachman : I see you peeking.

lmbachman's page activity

Visits<b>brwneyes</b> - the 02/27/2015 at 6:53pm<b>c_wyld</b> - the 02/16/2015 at 4:33am<b>Bulldozer36</b> - the 02/09/2015 at 3:39pm<b>gottahandittome</b> - the 02/09/2015 at 6:14am<b>birdybirdchirp</b> - the 02/08/2015 at 10:59pm<b>papygeorges</b> - the 01/21/2015 at 9:03am<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 01/21/2015 at 8:25am<b>WildHorses1987</b> - the 01/20/2015 at 4:21pm<b>yaboi19</b> - the 01/19/2015 at 11:00pm<b>cokeman666</b> - the 01/19/2015 at 10:29pm<b>HairIsEverything</b> - the 01/19/2015 at 6:58pm<b>AprilBlahBlah</b> - the 01/19/2015 at 4:22pm<b>kramona</b> - the 01/19/2015 at 3:43pm<b>londoner86</b> - the 01/19/2015 at 3:20pm<b>avatarwill5</b> - the 01/19/2015 at 2:19pm<b>Zookne</b> - the 01/06/2015 at 6:49am<b>Brandi_Faith</b> - the 01/05/2015 at 1:12am<b>sammiess12</b> - the 01/05/2015 at 12:39am

lmbachman's FML badges

100 kick ass comments

100 of your comments are neither buried or moderated. Popular is your middle name!

It’s in the can

Hey, you uploaded your photo, and you’re cute as a kitten!

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

See all of lmbachman's badges

lmbachman's favorite FMLs

Today, I'm moving from Arizona to Washington State with my 2 cats in my car. I've only just left and just learned that one cat gets carsick and the other stress farts. Only 956 more miles to go. FML

#20962468
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43135) - you deserved it (5847)

On 11/18/2013 at 6:47pm - animals - by Catcrap! - United States (California)

Today, I decided to confront my friend who has been stealing from me for months. She denied it, while wearing a pair of my pants. FML

#20959350
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44102) - you deserved it (3977)

On 11/16/2013 at 12:17am - misc - by CODgirl102 - United States (Florida)

Today, I was watching TV when my sister-in-law called me, laughing. It turns out my brother got his head stuck between the bars on the stairs. Again. My brother is 29. FML

#20957769
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38035) - you deserved it (2810)

On 11/14/2013 at 5:44pm - misc - by AshlynnPrime - United States (Kentucky)

Today, after making several comments about how I didn't exactly look thin, my boyfriend said, "Well, at least we know you'll look good pregnant." FML

#20954137
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42508) - you deserved it (9573)

On 11/11/2013 at 4:41pm - love - by Cheer4Life (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I met my brother's girlfriend. We got talking, and we got onto the subject of tattoos. I said how much I hated tramp stamps, and how they make girls look trashy. She said, "Like this?" and showed me hers. FML

#20952213
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38754) - you deserved it (17962)

On 11/10/2013 at 12:51am - misc - by tramp - United States

Today, I watched as my grandma beat the shit out of my dad at the zoo. FML

#20948659
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46468) - you deserved it (4260)

On 11/07/2013 at 12:52am - misc - by Grandson - United States (California)

Today, at work, I had to explain to my co-manager at work what a period was, after he refused to let an employee go change her tampon. Afterwards, he panicked, saying he thought women made that up so they didn't have to have sex, before trying to send her to the hospital and fainting. We're 24. FML

#20944786
203 comments

I agree, your life sucks (62346) - you deserved it (4054)

On 11/04/2013 at 12:45am - intimacy - by TheTruthofWomen (woman) - United States

Today, I sat down with my daughter to have the sex talk, because she recently started seeing a guy. I mentioned at one point how disappointed I would be if she got pregnant. She went wide-eyed and asked, "Didn't mom tell you?" FML

#20942769
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57740) - you deserved it (6029)

On 11/02/2013 at 5:10pm - kids - by unknown (man) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I woke up to a brand new password on my phone that only my wife knows. Apparently, she thinks I've been looking at my phone more than I've been talking to her lately. FML

#20942179
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24839) - you deserved it (42923)

On 11/02/2013 at 2:27am - love - by LockedOut (man) - United States

Today, I took my two and a half year-old son Trick or Treating for the first time in our new neighborhood. At the very first house, a girl told us we were too early and slammed the door in our face. My son cried. FML

Today, while I was working out, I was listening to music with my earbuds in. The Pokémon theme started playing and I begun singing along. It wasn't too long after that I remembered I was in a crowded gym on a military base. FML

#20940589
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37360) - you deserved it (10647)

On 10/31/2013 at 7:18pm - misc - by GymBattle (man) - United States

Today, I rushed to a dentist's appointment. Once in the chair, I apologized for not having had the time to brush my teeth beforehand. He responded with, "Ah that's alright, I just took a piss and forgot to wash my hands." FML

#20937985
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45898) - you deserved it (12453)

On 10/29/2013 at 2:57pm - health - by Anonymous - Zimbabwe

Today, a hornet thought it would be fun to fly into a candle that I had lit. As the hornet burned to death, it flung its charred body at my face, which is more painful than it sounds. FML

#20936891
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39700) - you deserved it (3099)

On 10/28/2013 at 4:18pm - misc - by Asshole hornet - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I found out that my husband told his mom that she can move in with us once his time in the army is over. We are moving into my house, and he didn't think it was important to run it by me first. FML

Today, my mother came over to visit, and my kids started excitedly telling her Christmas is coming soon. She freaked out, saying Christmas is a "Satanic holiday" and telling them that Santa is going to hell along with everyone who celebrates it. My children are now traumatized. FML

#20933801
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41294) - you deserved it (3241)

On 10/25/2013 at 7:20pm - kids - by Jane M (woman) - United States (Indiana)



Mathilde Morieux's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • The Best of the Worst #12
  • Another month, another bunch of shitposts. Yes, it's time to delve into the postbag and have another look at the weird and wonderful stuff we've been sent by people from all over the world. Hope you…

Tuesday 3 March 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: