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lmbachman

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lmbachman

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 1076
  • Number of comments : 105
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 21 posted

About lmbachman : Doing what I do.

lmbachman's page activity

Visits<b>cotteb</b> - the 11/15/2014 at 1:58pm<b>yeannie</b> - the 11/14/2014 at 11:30pm<b>gurbism</b> - the 11/14/2014 at 2:36pm<b>FunnyDude1215</b> - the 11/14/2014 at 1:44pm<b>killerkcpup</b> - the 11/13/2014 at 12:16pm<b>TheRealHarleyCat</b> - the 11/13/2014 at 8:44am<b>xokpxo</b> - the 10/16/2014 at 5:17pm<b>KILLROY570</b> - the 10/16/2014 at 9:28am<b>rocker_chick23</b> - the 09/26/2014 at 8:50pm<b>MrItalia</b> - the 07/07/2014 at 7:12am<b>mzweier</b> - the 07/06/2014 at 12:51pm<b>crazykitty121</b> - the 07/06/2014 at 3:15am<b>conman531</b> - the 05/06/2014 at 9:40am<b>tymarie2012</b> - the 10/21/2013 at 4:25am<b>pantherfan0877</b> - the 09/04/2013 at 5:37am<b>IndridCold</b> - the 09/03/2013 at 2:43pm<b>Domo17</b> - the 08/25/2013 at 10:29pm<b>lewisite</b> - the 08/13/2013 at 8:47pm

lmbachman's FML badges

It’s in the can

Hey, you uploaded your photo, and you’re cute as a kitten!

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

See all of lmbachman's badges

lmbachman's favorite FMLs

Today, my boyfriend broke a glass in the kitchen and accidentally stepped on it, cutting his foot. He asked me if I could help him clean his cut. Apparently, he's ticklish and I now have a huge bruise on my chest from where he kicked me. FML

#20929509
41 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38160) - you deserved it (3134)

On 10/21/2013 at 9:24pm - health - by ouch.... (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I tried Ambien for the first time. I now have to apologize to most of my exes for excessively rambling emails about getting together for some naked Twister. FML

#20929399
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31553) - you deserved it (10625)

On 10/21/2013 at 8:12pm - health - by OutOfMyMind (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, my father was taking pictures of my friend and me as we got ready for homecoming. After the pictures were taken, he offered to show us. He scrolled one picture too far and ended up showing us a picture of his penis. FML

#20927261
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59512) - you deserved it (4536)

On 10/20/2013 at 9:02am - intimacy - by Female_Lucifer (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, after recently complaining that the reality show "The Great Norway Adventure" portrays us as a country of nationalistic rednecks, I saw my drunk dad chasing my uncle on a tractor while bellowing the national anthem at the top of his lungs. FML

#20926483
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43571) - you deserved it (4768)

On 10/19/2013 at 3:37pm - misc - by overly nationalistic redneck (woman) - Norway (Hordaland)

Today, my mom let me stay home from school, because I was sick. We both agreed not to tell my dad, since he's adamant that I never miss even one day of school. A few hours after my mom left for work, he came back home, with another woman. FML

#20925128
180 comments

I agree, your life sucks (67087) - you deserved it (3096)

On 10/18/2013 at 12:26pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Norway (Hordaland)

Today, my five-year-old daughters realized that if one of them rang the doorbell, it would keep me distracted long enough for the other one to steal cookies from the kitchen. FML

#20922561
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46819) - you deserved it (6528)

On 10/16/2013 at 9:33am - kids - by TiredMum - United States (Washington)

Today, my boyfriend dumped me for knowing more about Batman than he does. He's only seen some of the movies, and as a kid my dad owned a comic book store. He still doesn't see why I should know more, because I'm a girl, and "girls aren't supposed to know about super heroes." FML

#20921778
199 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49269) - you deserved it (3623)

On 10/15/2013 at 5:48pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, my parents dropped by my new house, and my mother offered to tidy up for me while I was out. After they left, I noticed that her "tidying up" included throwing out all the pictures of my girlfriend and replacing them with pictures of herself. FML

#20921711
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47083) - you deserved it (4457)

On 10/15/2013 at 4:52pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Cambridgeshire)

Today, I got dumped because a guy sat next to me at a party and I didn't get up to change seats. Apparently, it means I subconsciously like the guy who sat down. FML

#20919316
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41931) - you deserved it (3751)

On 10/13/2013 at 8:33pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Arkansas)

Today, my ex-wife put my number on Craigslist as a gay fashion designer needing a one night stand. I only found out when I got a text from an unknown number asking me when was the last time I "ate a black anaconda". FML

#20894419
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50373) - you deserved it (4831)

On 09/24/2013 at 2:12pm - intimacy - by Craigslist is Evil. - United States (Tennessee)

Today, my 2-year-old daughter overheard my wife and I arguing and fixated on one particular insult my wife threw at me. Now my daughter won't stop saying "Daddy a numbnuts", always with a big smile on her face. FML

#20892563
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34987) - you deserved it (5450)

On 09/23/2013 at 1:48am - kids - by numbnuts (man) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my sister and her two-year-old came to my place for a visit. Not long after arriving, my niece ripped off her diaper and immediately took a dump on my white carpet. Guess who had to 'suddenly' leave afterwards, leaving me to clean up the mess. FML

#20892017
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38652) - you deserved it (2586)

On 09/22/2013 at 8:08pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, my husband refused to let our 7-week-old daughter have a pacifier, because he doesn't want her growing up to be a "whore." FML

#20891477
166 comments

Today, I helped my brother propose to his girlfriend of 5 years in the spot where they had first met. As he delivered his heartfelt speech, a sizable crowd appeared. When he got down on one knee, she punched him in the gut, yelled, "I never loved you", and ran away. Now he won't talk to me. FML

#20887080
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48167) - you deserved it (3038)

On 09/18/2013 at 9:45pm - love - by ElizaZee (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I met my birth mother. My dad won't talk to me, my mom won't stop crying and thinks I'm replacing her, and the rest of my family won't stop calling me a bitch. I'm 21, and I just wanted to meet the woman who pushed me head-first out of her vagina. FML



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