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lmbachman

Offline (11 hours ago) | Search for a member

lmbachman

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 935
  • Number of comments : 104
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 21 posted

About lmbachman : Doing what I do.

lmbachman's page activity

Visits<b>xokpxo</b> - the 10/16/2014 at 5:17pm<b>KILLROY570</b> - the 10/16/2014 at 9:28am<b>rocker_chick23</b> - the 09/26/2014 at 8:50pm<b>MrItalia</b> - the 07/07/2014 at 7:12am<b>mzweier</b> - the 07/06/2014 at 12:51pm<b>crazykitty121</b> - the 07/06/2014 at 3:15am<b>conman531</b> - the 05/06/2014 at 9:40am<b>tymarie2012</b> - the 10/21/2013 at 4:25am<b>pantherfan0877</b> - the 09/04/2013 at 5:37am<b>IndridCold</b> - the 09/03/2013 at 2:43pm<b>Domo17</b> - the 08/25/2013 at 10:29pm<b>lewisite</b> - the 08/13/2013 at 8:47pm<b>taylor27gang</b> - the 07/05/2013 at 4:09pm<b>gary3768</b> - the 05/27/2013 at 11:25pm<b>Devilpie666</b> - the 05/05/2013 at 3:44am

lmbachman's FML badges

It’s in the can

Hey, you uploaded your photo, and you’re cute as a kitten!

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

See all of lmbachman's badges

lmbachman's favorite FMLs

Today, my elderly neighbor along with our community church's priest came to my house and demanded to "give them the girl". The girl is my 3-year-old daughter, who has natural born red irises and is photo-sensitive. And yes, we are also Romanian. FML

#20985281
223 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53059) - you deserved it (2930)

On 12/08/2013 at 5:07pm - kids - by OakStake (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I was chatting with my mother. She was telling me about some new mouthwash she recently got, and the moment the word "gargle" escaped her lips, my husband muttered just a little too loudly from the kitchen, "How about gargling my balls instead, bitch." Our family is now at war. FML

#20985190
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46590) - you deserved it (5131)

On 12/08/2013 at 3:39pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I received a poorly-written letter from my asshole neighbor in which he threatened to "sew" me because my dog shat on his lawn again. I went over, asked if he needed some wool for his sewing, and told him to stop being an idiot. Now he's apparently hiring a lawyer for real. FML

#20981890
179 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39097) - you deserved it (21708)

On 12/05/2013 at 5:26pm - misc - by possibly a sweater (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, my neighbor put up an electric fence to keep my five-year-old son out. FML

#20980679
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37412) - you deserved it (12704)

On 12/04/2013 at 5:29pm - kids - by Awkward - United States (Washington)

Today, I was taking some clean bedsheets down from the top of the wardrobe. As I pulled the top sheet down, a cat jumped onto my face, claws and all, before falling to the floor and running away. Thing is, I don't own a cat and I have no idea where in the house it has hidden now. FML

#20972130
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41712) - you deserved it (2668)

On 11/27/2013 at 2:08am - animals - by Seriously_Scaredy_Cat - United States

Today, my mom visited. While she was using the bathroom, my man-child of a husband thought it would be funny to knock on the bathroom door with his penis, thinking it was me in there. She opened the door to find him standing there doing the "helicopter". FML

#20969751
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55096) - you deserved it (5818)

On 11/25/2013 at 12:22am - intimacy - by LadyLola (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I woke up from a drunken one-night-stand. The person I slept with turned out to be heavily pregnant. She tried to convince me that I am the father and that I passed out for 7 months. FML

Today, I'm moving from Arizona to Washington State with my 2 cats in my car. I've only just left and just learned that one cat gets carsick and the other stress farts. Only 956 more miles to go. FML

#20962468
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42091) - you deserved it (5719)

On 11/18/2013 at 6:47pm - animals - by Catcrap! - United States (California)

Today, I decided to confront my friend who has been stealing from me for months. She denied it, while wearing a pair of my pants. FML

#20959350
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43976) - you deserved it (3966)

On 11/16/2013 at 12:17am - misc - by CODgirl102 - United States (Florida)

Today, I was watching TV when my sister-in-law called me, laughing. It turns out my brother got his head stuck between the bars on the stairs. Again. My brother is 29. FML

#20957769
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36760) - you deserved it (2685)

On 11/14/2013 at 5:44pm - misc - by AshlynnPrime - United States (Kentucky)

Today, after making several comments about how I didn't exactly look thin, my boyfriend said, "Well, at least we know you'll look good pregnant." FML

#20954137
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41226) - you deserved it (9393)

On 11/11/2013 at 4:41pm - love - by Cheer4Life (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I met my brother's girlfriend. We got talking, and we got onto the subject of tattoos. I said how much I hated tramp stamps, and how they make girls look trashy. She said, "Like this?" and showed me hers. FML

#20952213
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37650) - you deserved it (17487)

On 11/10/2013 at 12:51am - misc - by tramp - United States

Today, I watched as my grandma beat the shit out of my dad at the zoo. FML

#20948659
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45053) - you deserved it (4110)

On 11/07/2013 at 12:52am - misc - by Grandson - United States (California)

Today, at work, I had to explain to my co-manager at work what a period was, after he refused to let an employee go change her tampon. Afterwards, he panicked, saying he thought women made that up so they didn't have to have sex, before trying to send her to the hospital and fainting. We're 24. FML

#20944786
199 comments

I agree, your life sucks (62079) - you deserved it (4046)

On 11/04/2013 at 12:45am - intimacy - by TheTruthofWomen (woman) - United States

Today, I sat down with my daughter to have the sex talk, because she recently started seeing a guy. I mentioned at one point how disappointed I would be if she got pregnant. She went wide-eyed and asked, "Didn't mom tell you?" FML

#20942769
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57571) - you deserved it (6016)

On 11/02/2013 at 5:10pm - kids - by unknown (man) - Canada (British Columbia)



Zach Stafford's illustrated FML

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  • Everybody's talking about Ebola at the moment. I have trouble keeping up with the latest trends. I'm going to wait until Christmas and see what special offers turn up in the shops, under funky new names…

Friday 17 October 2014

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