lmbachman

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Offline (the 07/12/2016 at 7:04am)

lmbachman

21Fucked!

lmbachman
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 4763
  • Number of comments : 198
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 24 posted

About lmbachman : I see you peeking.

lmbachman's page activity

Visits<b>BonerFart</b> - the 07/29/2016 at 12:25am<b>blaze17</b> - the 07/28/2016 at 1:17pm<b>yanalynch</b> - the 07/14/2016 at 2:48am<b>billcosby31</b> - the 06/15/2016 at 9:27pm<b>JETarchitect</b> - the 05/26/2016 at 7:07am<b>Cbnotme</b> - the 05/20/2016 at 3:21pm<b>MrGibbs25</b> - the 05/07/2016 at 12:49pm<b>Rababco</b> - the 05/03/2016 at 4:03pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 05/01/2016 at 10:51pm<b>anonymous198913</b> - the 04/25/2016 at 8:27pm<b>bolee997</b> - the 04/23/2016 at 3:37pm<b>tin_cup</b> - the 04/22/2016 at 12:40am<b>LuxEtTenebris</b> - the 03/17/2016 at 11:54pm<b>n_a_v_y</b> - the 03/09/2016 at 5:53am<b>Michelle1121</b> - the 03/01/2016 at 7:01am<b>MissDarkness</b> - the 02/29/2016 at 6:21pm<b>EmmaMK</b> - the 02/20/2016 at 5:15pm<b>pupeve</b> - the 02/20/2016 at 11:04am

Fucked!<b>billcosby31</b> - the 06/16/2016 at 3:27am<b>JETarchitect</b> - the 05/26/2016 at 1:07pm<b>Michelle1121</b> - the 03/01/2016 at 1:01pm<b>orcatheseapanda</b> - the 02/18/2016 at 12:15pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 02/10/2016 at 8:12pm<b>bigirlsrockoxox</b> - the 02/06/2016 at 4:56am<b>FujisakiChihiro</b> - the 02/05/2016 at 11:08pm<b>WoodKiller</b> - the 02/03/2016 at 4:32pm<b>EmmaMK</b> - the 01/29/2016 at 12:05am<b>pop17123</b> - the 01/26/2016 at 4:15pm<b>FalloutScrolls</b> - the 01/24/2016 at 11:27pm<b>ughlifesuck</b> - the 01/19/2016 at 8:49pm<b>dyoy_87</b> - the 01/10/2016 at 2:32pm<b>eski2015</b> - the 01/08/2016 at 5:05am<b>NarutoLove</b> - the 01/02/2016 at 2:08am<b>lukian</b> - the 12/25/2015 at 10:19pm<b>gobiteme2</b> - the 11/14/2015 at 12:44am<b>dramaelf</b> - the 08/19/2015 at 8:41pm

lmbachman's FML badges

Socialite

You’ve used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

See all of lmbachman's badges

lmbachman's favorite FMLs

Today, I got a phone call letting me know my grandmother was arrested for trying to light my grandpa on fire. She's now in jail, asking for bail money. FML

by tkoester / 08/29/2015 at 12:29am / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous

Today, a cute guy approached me at a nightclub. I was really excited, until he drunkenly slurred "Babe, I'd suck the farts from your asshole!" and then threw up everywhere. FML

by Brooke / 08/14/2015 at 12:50pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, at my grandmother's funeral, my senile grandfather kept asking me "Where's granny? I've been looking for her, but I can't find her." FML

by Anonymous / 08/14/2015 at 11:08am / Denmark / Miscellaneous

Today, frustrated with my very energetic kids, I told them that if they dug a hole deep enough in the backyard, they'd find China. What they really found was the previous owner's dog. FML

by pheonixxe / 06/01/2015 at 6:45pm / United States (Wyoming) / Kids

Today, a couple asked me donate my eggs so they could start a family. When I refused, I was called heartless by my ex-husband and the woman he cheated on me with for over two years. FML

by Anonymous / 05/16/2015 at 1:46pm / United Kingdom (Southampton) / Miscellaneous

Today, I finally worked up the courage to tell my dad about my worries for my mental health. He then told me about the tracking device the aliens had implanted in his hand when they abducted him. There's nothing like family. FML

by flibbertigibbet / 05/07/2015 at 4:56pm / United States (California) / Health

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I was supposed to light candles at my aunt's wedding. I accidentally lit the groom on fire. FML

by why? / 05/01/2015 at 9:41am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, a guy asked me for my number. Now I deeply regret giving it to him, because he won't stop sending me Bible quotes and pictures of Jesus. FML

by Iwtumn / 04/30/2015 at 2:15pm / Austria (Steiermark) / Love

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, while with a large group of friends, my best friend started talking about my struggles with dating and intimacy. I quietly asked her to stop talking about it, as it was personal and I wasn't comfortable with everyone else knowing. Her response? "Um, it's really none of your business." FML

by guitarki / 04/26/2015 at 2:49pm / United States (North Carolina) / Miscellaneous

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, in a crowded doctor's waiting room, my two-year-old daughter let a loud fart rip. I asked her, "What do we say?" She replied, "IT'S ME!" FML

by bleue / 04/23/2015 at 8:27am / France (Midi-Pyrenees) / Kids

Today, I was working in the garden, when some fire ants ran up my shorts and bit me on an intimate part of my anatomy. My 4 year old nephew will not stop telling people about my rapid strip tease. FML

by Exodiafinder687 / 04/12/2015 at 5:06am / United States (Florida) / Kids

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, at a mind-numbingly boring support session, everyone was talking about their hardships. One guy was talking about losing his leg in a car accident. I was half-asleep and asked without thinking, "Did you ever find it?" I almost shat my pants at the roomful of death glares that followed. FML

by S to the HIT / 04/08/2015 at 12:08pm / United States (California) / Work

Today, at the DMV I was told I had to prove, with a doctor's note, that I was an amputee and my disability was permanent to get my placard. Apparently, setting my prosthetic leg on the counter wasn't proof enough, and is considered "threatening". The police were called. FML

by usadisvet / 04/02/2015 at 2:43am / United States (Tennessee) / Health

Today, I got in an argument with an ex-girlfriend who kept tactlessly bragging to me about her new boyfriend. I told her to read what she'd sent me, then pretend her boyfriend was telling her that. Fifteen minutes later, her boyfriend calls me, yelling for making her feel sad. FML

by lucasbeck99 / 03/31/2015 at 5:35am / United States (Texas) / Love

Today, I was playing charades with my boyfriend and family. The answer was "Beckoning" so I acted it out with a "come here" gesture. He looked confused for a second, then blurted out "Fingering?" FML

by ajodasdojsad / 03/21/2015 at 11:12am / United Kingdom (Surrey) / Miscellaneous